Out. Of. Control.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 6:51 PM GMT
    It has become clear to me that it is practically impossible to reach the perfection that most gay men look for, whether that be in a partner or even someone to chat or chill with. We are forever looking for younger, more attractive, more muscular men...and ostracize those who do not fit this mold. The other day, I emailed a guy who was at the ripe age of 19. He was devastatingly handsome and muscular.

    The email sent went as follows, "hey man, you're looking really good. I am looking to build a better routine in the gym, and wondered what your workouts were looking like these days?"

    The response I received in return, "dude, you're old...don't fucking email me again"

    What would be a good response back to this crude email back? I was completely flabbergasted by the whole thing, I just didn't respond. Have we really got to this point where 26 is old, or that I'm not muscular or athletic enough even for people that are less so than I?

    My birthday is November 5th, and I will be turning 26. And, although I am turning another year older, I look and feel better than I did when I was 21. 5 years ago I was 40lbs lighter than what I am today, glasses, and braces...making for a very gawky and awkward kid. When I look at my progress I am so proud of myself and what I have accomplished in a short amount of time. I am in the gym everyday of the week now, because I believe my body is always a work in progress. But, each time I am put down or treated as if I'm a vile human being after all that work, I feel less and less comfortable with my progress and my body, even though I shouldn't be.

    When will this cycle stop?
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    Oct 14, 2011 7:13 PM GMT
    If the guy who said that to you was a 5-year-old, it wouldn't bother you, because you'd realize he's just an immature child who understands nothing.

    Now, listen closely: the guy who said that to you is just an immature child who understands nothing.

    It's convenient that he let you know that up front, before you had a chance to invest any sort of feeling in him. It's sad that he let you know by saying something hateful and obnoxious, but that's the way children are.

    As for when the "cycle" stops, there are plenty of immature children out there, of all ages. But you can stop the cycle by simply ignoring him and moving on. Once you truly realize he's just a hopeless infant, you shouldn't feel the need to respond further.

    And, by the way, you look fuckin great.
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    Oct 14, 2011 7:22 PM GMT
    I'm sure you know better than to base all of your experience around this one 19 year old. Simply, he's just a vain douche... but that's okay, because if you're not then it's all good.

    What worries me most is the fact that a lot of gays do not see others as humans unless they're attracted to them, not just the little things like age gaps. As if a veil is there full of depletion and voiding that person standing in front of them of holding any soft of compassion towards them.

    I won't continue on the subject at hand, but, you're not alone. Some people are just plain out dicks.
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    Oct 14, 2011 7:38 PM GMT
    This type of thing comes down to selfish,self absorbed a-holes that lack consideration for others. Anyone like that does not deserve the time of day. If your old at 26 then I am a walking corpse at 45.

    Even at the age of 20 I had the foresight to see and ask people, that walked the walk before me, for guidence. I also apprectiated the work and efforts gay men made so that I could have the rights and freedoms that I had. Clearly you encountered someone that just takes and will never give back.

    I firmly believe the universe will knock poeple like the one you encountered on their ass. At least untill they grasp a sense of being humble.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 7:49 PM GMT
    When you take a dump do you pay attention to what the shit in the bowl tells you?

    Same situation.
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    Oct 14, 2011 7:54 PM GMT
    This isn't a big giant trend or an indictment on gay culture. This is a douchebag. Move on.
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    Oct 14, 2011 8:21 PM GMT
    In gayland (the harsh reality that Candyland did not prepare us for) you are an old troll. I am too. It bothers me very little. Yet you created a thread about it, since you wanted a groupthink opinion on how to best serve up a cold dish of Klingon revenge.

    Alpha is correct: he is a d-bag.

    A good teaching lesson from this experience: when you are older than 19, the vast majority of 19 year olds are largely useless for anything besides sex - and only then if they have an old troll fetish and feel crushingly obligated after you buy them a quesadilla.
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    Oct 14, 2011 8:24 PM GMT
    Dude you are hot. I only go after 30 year olds and I would let you twist my nethers. Get over it and deal with it.
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    Oct 14, 2011 8:31 PM GMT

    You could just ignore him.

    It's similar to kids becoming celebrities and their soul becoming ruined for life. At 19, he'll be a star contained in that website. He'll get tons of attention, power, sex. It will corrupt him just like millions of dollars or unlimited fans with no self-respect doing anything to be noticed by him.

    If you want to be spiteful, you could say "I feel sorry for you, you've become rotten on the inside at only 19. Your life is going to be filled with broken relationships, a lack of exposure to reality, a feeling that no one actually likes you for you, and the knowledge that no one who really knows you could be proud of you. I wouldn't wish that on an enemy, and I wish I could offer you some hope, but I'm afraid you're already irreparably damaged. I won't contact you again because I am afraid of your damage dirtying me. Have a ... life."

    Did that really just come out of my mind? icon_surprised.gif

    Or you could be sympathetic and tell him to beware the dangers of overpopularity before you leave him behind, that way you're on the highroad and he can take the wisdom or leave it. Your choice! icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 8:32 PM GMT
    Chainers saidI only go after 30 year olds...



    What happens when they turn 31?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 8:35 PM GMT
    You look great. Block the bitch.

    Don´t give silly twink cunts that much power in your life again.

    OK?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 9:20 PM GMT
    DJBoston said
    Chainers saidI only go after 30 year olds...



    What happens when they turn 31?



    Well I generally mean guys in their 30s and up, but hey, 31 is still candy to me!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 9:22 PM GMT
    not to be insensitive, but people are assholes - regardless of age. don't let those things bother you or you will drive yourself insane!

    you're obviously a very hot and super fit dude! icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 14, 2011 9:34 PM GMT
    *sigh* This is not just a gay thing, it's an immature person thing.

    Rather than let it bother you, just use it as a lesson not to be an ass to others who you may not find desirable.

    With your looks you will not have a problem finding a nice guy.
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    Oct 14, 2011 9:54 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk said
    . Let's put this in a better perspective. When you were 21 he was 14 ... big difference huh? In his mind, you are going on 30 and he still just remembering getting his drivers license.


    I hate when people do that! It's putting it in a worse perspective. It makes it less relevant.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 14, 2011 11:38 PM GMT
    26 is NOT old, I was prepared to get botox at 30, but now, apparently, I'll need it in 5 years icon_eek.gificon_eek.gificon_eek.gificon_lol.gif
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    Oct 14, 2011 11:43 PM GMT
    He nipped at your ego, didn't he?

    Don't worry. He's missing out.
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    Oct 14, 2011 11:52 PM GMT
    Alpha_Muscle saidThis isn't a big giant trend or an indictment on gay culture. This is a douchebag. Move on.


    But "douchebag" is a group of people very similar to "gay culture."
  • iowaboy86

    Posts: 12

    Oct 15, 2011 12:00 AM GMT
    It really just depends on what you're looking for. From your post it sounds like you like younger guys, maybe he does too. I personally like older guys. Don't let it bother you bro, you're a good looking dude
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    Oct 15, 2011 12:12 AM GMT
    Thanks guys for all of the comments. I wasn't necessarily upset about the guy treating me the way he did... I was giving an example of what I was talking about in the beginning. It just seems as if there is always something with someone...you're not built enough, not handsome enough, not cocky enough etc. I wasn't trying to go after this guy either, just wanted to know workout advice...nothing more. I definitely do need to work on not taking things so personally, so thanks for those who said I shouldn't!! icon_biggrin.gif
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Oct 15, 2011 12:19 AM GMT
    Chainers said I only go after 30 year olds.



    20.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 15, 2011 8:59 PM GMT
    I would have LOL'd so hard to receive an email that said I was fucking old hahaha.

    And +1 to everyone giving love to the 30+ hotties. If 31 is fucking old, roll me into that sexy nursing home please.
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    Oct 16, 2011 1:35 AM GMT
    jpBITCHva said
    Lostboy saidYou look great. Block the bitch.

    Don´t give silly twink cunts that much power in your life again.

    OK?

    Exactly. You let one silly 19-yr old ruin your day? Shame on you. You're gorgeous. Go find someone worthwhile.

    It'll be fun when he turns 25 and hits on you, the hot 32-yr old. Think what fun it will be to tell him to fuck off.


    The OP said this individual was muscular. Therefore, not a twink, don't tarnish our reputation!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 16, 2011 6:31 AM GMT
    spaghettimonster saidIn gayland (the harsh reality that Candyland did not prepare us for) you are an old troll.


    Oh, good lord. In some freaky alternate universe, maybe. I'm 50 and I get more attention from guys in their 20s and 30s than I know what to do with. You guys are kids in comparison.

    I suspect this guy was trying to raise some very low self esteem by putting the OP down. Don't let him do it.
  • davidsticky69

    Posts: 412

    Oct 16, 2011 2:39 PM GMT
    I looked at this thread, then looked at the guy starting this thread, then ran to the bathroom and strip naked in front of the mirror to look at myself, thinking "HOLY SHIT!" icon_eek.gif

    But anyway, the kid is only 19 years old. Who'd give a damn about what a 19 years old thinks (When I was 19, I left my head in my ass all the time)

    To the ridiculously-good-looking gentleman who started this thread: Before anyone thinks you are sexy/hot/good-looking, you have to feel confident about your physical/mental state first. Be comfortable in your own skin. To me, sexiness oozes from one's outstanding, firm, confident demeanor. It ACTUALLY has got very little to do with the way he looks icon_wink.gif