Confusion and a Mix of New Emotions

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    May 25, 2008 10:46 PM GMT
    This is a long post.

    I am 21 years old and Never had a relationship with a Girl (or a Guy for that matter). My Dad went through 2 really bad marriages, and my Brother also went through a bad Marriage. I have always that was the reason that i have never had, for lack of a better words, an "attraction" in a relationship since. I just figured One day it would hit me and it would be the thing everyone talks about. If that makes any sense

    Ok let me get down to the main story. I just recently moved to a new city and Got a job at the local Casino. After getting promoted from Dishwasher to a Baker. I meet a guy named Wade. He is the stewart for the other restaurant that comes and picks up the fresh bread. Wade is not shy but keeps to him self and when I first met him i wondered if he was gay. I don't really know why i thought this.

    It just so happens our gr op for friends are the same. When I first met Wade he come across as a shy to me. One of the ladies told me not to worry about it and as he get to know me he will open up. after a few weeks. He became more inclined to talk to me, and soon we became friends, not like buds but more of like I see him in the Hall and we exchange greetings then go Our separate ways. One morning while I was on break Wade happen to come sit at the outside break tables but he did not sit with me (I was alone) but at a table next to me. I told him "I don't bite" so he got up and came and sat next to me and we started to talk more like friends. About a week later I happen to be in the Bakery alone and I notice Wade walked in to deliver the bread Order. As I turned around it seemed to me Wade thought I did not notice him walk in and was going to give me a Noogie to surprise me, But As i turned he stoped like he got nervous and decided not to do it. So I acted like i did not know. My guess was he accepted me as a friend and was going to joke around with me but then figured maybe ill take offense to it. So later that after noon he was carrying some boxes over head so I decided to break the Ice and took a playful jab at his stomic. Thus causing Wade and me to become friends. So now Wade and i are starting to talk more and i find that I feel different about him then i do with my other friends. I want to spend more time talking to him at Work so I started taking my breaks a little earlier So i can talk to him before he clocks into work and looking for reasons to go to where he may be at. And I must say I enjoy talking to him and getting to know him. well just recently he got his Hair cut short and styled it kind of messy in spikes. So when I saw this first time i went and put my hands on his head and messed up his hair and he popped my butt. Not hard but more of jokingly. When he did that I enjoyed it allot and now i am starting to realize that i was seeking out his attention more and more as I got to know him better. He has also becoming more cummy. i was entering a door he was coming out of and he shut the door and actually leaned against to block me from it while we talked for a bit and sometimes he comes behind me and grab the back part of my arm and turn me towards him to say hello.

    So here I am, A guy i am getting to know pops me on the butt i get an Intense Euphoria and i am wondering could I be Gay. i don't whats happening, but my Emotions run wild when i am around him and I like it. Well I have decided not to rush into these new Emotions i am getting, but to instead take it slowly. I was going to ask him if He wanted to see the Indianan Jones movie and then grab a beer. No sexual intentions in mined just want to become better friends with him at this point and As i said I don't know if he feels the same way so I don't want to creep him out if he is just an overly friendly person.
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    May 25, 2008 11:01 PM GMT
    Ok, reading that, you just sound sweet as hehe icon_smile.gif

    Don't rush to categorise what you feel.
    Perhaps you just really like this fella and want to spend more time with him.

    Spend time with him, get to know him, see how things work out.

    On the gay thing, you wanna sleep with guys? have a relationship with them? being 21, have you ever had an inkling that you could be gay? if you ask yoru self honestly if you are and are willing to hear the honest answer from your self you'll quickly work it out.

    maybe you just have an intense man crush hehehe icon_biggrin.gif I see straight mates get it all the time, funny as hell but so adorable!
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    May 26, 2008 3:53 AM GMT
    yeah i think only time will tell. something like this actually happend to me like last month sometime too. i had the same impression from this one straight guy until he finally wrestled me and we just kissed.... he enjoyed it but was way weirded out about kissing a guy afterwards. immediately got a girlfriend and tried to cover everything up as if it never happened. aka he is going through the whole closet scene just like everyone else.

    good luck bud. keep me posted dude
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    May 26, 2008 4:24 AM GMT
    Maybe you should ask Wade out for a beer and a talk and see what he is like. If he doesnt mind patting ur bum then he might also do the first step. Try getting closer. Not too close, just to see what he likes and doesnt, girlfriends and such.

    Now about you. Think of your teenage years and your attraction to men or women. Which felt better? Maybe you are bi. How do you view each sex?
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    May 26, 2008 4:30 AM GMT
    You came to a good choice on your own; Taking it easy. Just be yourself and go along without expectations.
  • badtouch

    Posts: 67

    May 26, 2008 5:02 AM GMT
    with regard to yourself, your indecision:

    i never went through this myself, but a very close friend of mine did. she was under the assumption that she was straight and not necessarily unhappy with it. then she began to wonder whether or not she was bi. the idea itself wasn't particularly surprising to me, but the seriousness with which she was taking this was a little jarring. she flew heavy into research mode, the way we both do, questioning me and other resources. after some heavy reading and light experimentation, she wound up discovering much more than she had anticipated about both herself and her sexual proclivities.

    test the waters, see how deep you'll like to swin, as these waters are wide.

    with regard to yourself, in context with your friend:

    regardless of your own intentions, whether known or acknowledged or hidden and surreptitious, you clearly appreciate him as an individual. seek him out as a friend, as it seems you'd want him in your life one way or the other. and as you unfold yourself, this with him will unfold concurrently.
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    May 26, 2008 11:58 AM GMT
    TroubledMind saidMaybe you should ask Wade out for a beer and a talk and see what he is like. If he doesnt mind patting ur bum then he might also do the first step. Try getting closer. Not too close, just to see what he likes and doesnt, girlfriends and such.

    Now about you. Think of your teenage years and your attraction to men or women. Which felt better? Maybe you are bi. How do you view each sex?


    a straight guy patting your backside doesn't mean anything.

    They just pat ya backside, my straight mates pat mine and each others, theres nothing actually sexual there its just umm, patting each others backsides hahaha
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    May 26, 2008 12:05 PM GMT
    lilTanker saida straight guy patting your backside doesn't mean anything.

    They just pat ya backside, my straight mates pat mine and each others, theres nothing actually sexual there its just umm, patting each others backsides hahaha


    I think it may mean more in America. Guys dont usually go around doing that.

    That was a sweet story. Good luck.

    Let us know about the first kiss!
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    May 26, 2008 12:31 PM GMT
    ah first love... *goes starry eyed*
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 27, 2008 4:57 PM GMT
    TroubledMind said
    Now about you. Think of your teenage years and your attraction to men or women. Which felt better? Maybe you are bi. How do you view each sex?


    As far as dateing I never really was looking for a date when i was younger. I was too buisy doing Plays, Singing, and School.

    My Mom, Dad and Step mother randomly say things like "If your gay were fine with it".I have been asked alot of times by people I just meet If I am gay.
    Is it possibly people know before me.

    How Do Straight guys know there straight. I wold think it something you would experance and be like i want to keep doing that.
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    May 27, 2008 11:15 PM GMT
    Karokekid said
    As far as dateing I never really was looking for a date when i was younger. I was too buisy doing Plays, Singing, and School.

    My Mom, Dad and Step mother randomly say things like "If your gay were fine with it".I have been asked alot of times by people I just meet If I am gay.
    Is it possibly people know before me.

    How Do Straight guys know there straight. I wold think it something you would experance and be like i want to keep doing that.


    hmmm, that questions a little more difficult to answer, I just knew I wasn't interested in women then but the guys always got me watching icon_smile.gif

    its just something that told me I was more interested in men then women, now its not so much the same as it was, am more interested in women then I used to be (mind you, still like the guys icon_biggrin.gif)

    if you listen to your head instead of doubting it and asking questions of it, it will usually give you the right answer.
  • mcwclewis

    Posts: 1701

    May 28, 2008 1:07 AM GMT
    Nah, some people need an experience to make the decision, and some people just know.
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    May 28, 2008 11:53 AM GMT
    seem like you can tell us weather people CHOOSE to be gay or people are BORN gay. Let us know.