What does emotionally unavalaible mean?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 29, 2011 9:24 PM GMT
    A friend asked me to explain this comment another friend said to them:

    " I am (they) emotionally unavalaible"

    One of those weird new 21st century sayings lol
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    Oct 29, 2011 9:25 PM GMT
    it means cut off, withdrawn emotionally, unable or unwilling to make any kind of connection beyond sex
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    Oct 29, 2011 9:31 PM GMT
    Emotionally Unavailable: (n)My current non-BF. icon_rolleyes.gif

    It's a really horrible thing to be. Painful to those who try to be close.
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    Oct 29, 2011 9:42 PM GMT
    I've said "I'm emotionally intangible and physically unavailable."

    They thought it was cute. icon_lol.gif

    I haveee said "I'm emotionally preoccupied."

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    Oct 29, 2011 10:20 PM GMT
    That means when you want sex, he's there, but when you want to talk or have a shoulder to cry on, he's not. icon_sad.gif

    Some of these guys won't even kiss during sex, or cuddle w/ you. inorite?

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    Oct 29, 2011 10:47 PM GMT
    FTTL11 saidA friend asked me to explain this comment another friend said to them:

    " I am (they) emotionally unavalaible"

    One of those weird new 21st century sayings lol


    It could mean all the things that everyone has said or it could mean that they are too stressed/dealing with their own shit to comfort someone else. It doesn't have to be a permanent state.
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    Oct 30, 2011 12:30 AM GMT
    I don't cuddle, don't do breakfast, don't text and will not acknowledge you in mixed company.
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    Oct 30, 2011 12:33 AM GMT
    More 20th century. Means they're a bit thick and/or a bit too intelligent for their own good. Generally.
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    Oct 30, 2011 12:36 AM GMT
    it means they can't and won't think of anyone else but themselves...it goes well with a side of peterpan complex...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2011 12:37 AM GMT
    Means what most people have already stated. Beyond a hookup or friendship, nothing is going to happen.
  • novemberfox1

    Posts: 32

    Oct 30, 2011 12:50 AM GMT
    It could also mean youre not there when the other half needs you. You have to be open to moving beyond your own comfort zone to show them the love and attention they might need. It could be praising them for liitle things they do to help out, complimenting them, or holding them when theyre scared or in pain.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:04 AM GMT
    I've been emotionally unavailable in the past. It didn't mean I was looking to just sleep with a guy... but it did mean that my emotions were preoccupied elsewhere and I really didn't have the ability at the time to give the guy i was trying to see the attention or affection or connection he really deserved.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:06 AM GMT
    Larkin_PLR saidI've been emotionally unavailable in the past. It didn't mean I was looking to just sleep with a guy... but it did mean that my emotions were preoccupied elsewhere and I really didn't have the ability at the time to give the guy i was trying to see the attention or affection or connection he really deserved.


    Yeah true, its just so hard sometimes... especially when your in a major that actually requires you to think... lol you have to focus your brain on studying and other stuff... sometimes you need to study or do something social and you feel this obligation to see someone... its not easy lol
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:23 AM GMT
    doesn't it basically mean they're not comfortable exchanging emotions? whether its sharing feelings with a friend or love with a lover?
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    Oct 30, 2011 2:08 AM GMT
    It is apparently a condition linked to "just sex".

    A little too familiar with this right now.

    Well, off to the gym for some therapy and sweat.


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    Oct 30, 2011 4:41 AM GMT
    Trollileo saidI've always been emotionally unavailable. I have a hard time sharing my true emotions with another human being.
    Wow.. someone actually being truthful in this post!
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    Oct 30, 2011 4:46 AM GMT
    Trollileo saidI've always been emotionally unavailable. I have a hard time sharing my true emotions with another human being.


    me too...
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    Oct 30, 2011 6:53 AM GMT
    Thanks for the replies, I really wa not sure myself.

    I thought it didn't mean someone was just after sex by that try were for friendship only and didn't want anyone else or just won't follow through etc.

    It seems to be an all to common occurrence why the sounds of it.
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    Oct 30, 2011 7:04 AM GMT
    Lostboy saidit means cut off, withdrawn emotionally, unable or unwilling to make any kind of connection beyond sex


    Or even sex...
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    Oct 30, 2011 12:44 PM GMT
    ThePenIsMyTier saidEmotionally Unavailable: (n)My current non-BF. icon_rolleyes.gif

    It's a really horrible thing to be. Painful to those who try to be close.


    this. i would also add, if they are emotionally unavailable, my dumb-ass is prolly really attracted to them. and always ends up being hurt by them. ah yes, plenty of irrationality and suffering for both sides. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:03 PM GMT
    I'm not into you, i find you a frog, but I'm too politically correct to actually say this

    I want to fuck as many guys, anything on two legs actually and I will feel a little guilt if I do this while seeing you.

    I want to fuck you with the attachment, while I wait for a hotter guy that's right around the corner to come along

    Love is for losers. I'm a man. I was place here to screw
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Oct 30, 2011 1:10 PM GMT
    I think it depends on how it is said..... I would take it as that they aren't
    willing to invest any real emotion into a friendship or certainly a relationship.

    I'd probably cross somebody who said that off any immediate list.... although
    it would be helpful if you knew what was going on with them. They might have lost a friend or relative or busted up from a relationship..... in which case they just need time.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:22 PM GMT
    FTTL11 saidThanks for the replies, I really wa not sure myself.

    I thought it didn't mean someone was just after sex by that try were for friendship only and didn't want anyone else or just won't follow through etc.

    It seems to be an all to common occurrence why the sounds of it.

    I'm not really sure myself, but I think it does exist for varying reasons, and this is more the realm of psychology.

    Children from homes with little affection and emotional interaction can be emotionally deficient as adults. Institutionalized children, such as orphans, have been observed to have a higher incidence of emotional detachment in adulthood, though that may not prevent them from being achievers in other ways.

    Life trauma can cause the hurt syndrome, encouraging us to erect emotional barriers so we can't be hurt as badly again. Being emotionally available can also expose us to vulnerability, and so some will chose to avoid close relationships. This past trauma can include the death of loved ones, and the breakdown of a marriage or other relationship. I've been there quite a few times myself, but always seem to recover somewhat over time.

    Though perhaps not as completely as I was before the trauma. And I've said to others I feel myself more emotionally scarred each time, not as fully functional as I was before, analogous to a loss of range of physical motion, as caused by my accidents & illnesses.

    I even confessed this to my present partner and apologized, a change in me brought about by the death of my first partner, and he said he'd become the same way following his own late partner's death. By virtue of us sharing this experience I think we've each recovered more of our emotional availability and vulnerability than we might have done separately, however, drawing strength & confidence from each other, and feeling a little safer to reveal our emotions again.

    And then I think there's the guy who's the narcissist. When you're consumed with self-love there often isn't much room left for anyone else. That's the one guy who's probably not going to improve a lot with time, so when you identify him he's best left to stare into his mirror alone.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:47 PM GMT
    emotionally unavailable = me
    but i'll be ready soon. icon_wink.gif

    And I think the below needs to be QFT.

    Art_Deco said

    Children from homes with little affection and emotional interaction can be emotionally deficient as adults. Institutionalized children, such as orphans, have been observed to have a higher incidence of emotional detachment in adulthood, though that may not prevent them from being achievers in other ways.

    Life trauma can cause the hurt syndrome, encouraging us to erect emotional barriers so we can't be hurt as badly again. Being emotionally available can also expose us to vulnerability, and so some will chose to avoid close relationships. This past trauma can include the death of loved ones, and the breakdown of a marriage or other relationship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:48 PM GMT
    it means i am not into you, when i am need to you.



    he means when you want sex you will get him.



    amazingly practical.