Always disappointing someone...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2011 1:25 PM GMT
    so few months ago i was on here crying about a guy and low and behold... things are finally better and we are on the right track to beginning a relationship. However, a week ago i was blackout and a guy went hitting on me. He was the ex of one of my girl friends and he just came out of the closet. This guy is basically perfect apparently from what all of my friends say and that we have so much in common and we look good together. well i didnt remember meeting him til i got a txt from him. all week we have been txting and the first night he asked if i was single and i said that i was involved with someone but its not official.(i also told my guy about everything). Flash forward to last night the guy was really flirty and rubbing my leg and he asked so what are our chances of trying the dating thing out? i was speechless and i had to turn him down again and now i feel awful. only reason im not pursuing anything is because i have a thing with my boy now.... but my friends really like this other guy a lot better and it seems we have more in common with each other.


    how have others' situations gone?
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    Oct 30, 2011 2:12 PM GMT
    sounds like you should be screwing around, not looking for a potential relationship
  • NHLFAN

    Posts: 370

    Oct 30, 2011 4:18 PM GMT
    closer85 saidsounds like you should be screwing around, not looking for a potential relationship


    +1

    If you are in a relationship with someone that's who you should be with. Sounds like you aren't ready to settle down.
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    Oct 30, 2011 5:46 PM GMT
    I would say what they ^ said.. as in not date just one person at a time until something settled comes by.. that said.. I dont really know your situation... your feelings may be on just the one guy for now, so... meh
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    Oct 30, 2011 10:39 PM GMT
    NHLFAN said
    closer85 saidsounds like you should be screwing around, not looking for a potential relationship


    +1

    If you are in a relationship with someone that's who you should be with. Sounds like you aren't ready to settle down.


    +2
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    Oct 30, 2011 10:58 PM GMT
    JakeGHK saidSo you basically think your friends ex-boyfriend would be a great match for you while you have a man?


    That's the type of shit that causes drama...people get shot, killed and landed in jail. And I ain't the one to go all out like that.

    It's good that the OP said no, but I believe you're feeling unnecessary guilt. You are involved. Get it in your head. Fuck his feelings. You're going to hurt 2 people's feelings and yourself by being a creep.

    So congrats on standing your ground otherwise.
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    Oct 30, 2011 11:06 PM GMT
    How long are you dating with the first guy?

    Why don't you date both of them? I mean I'm not that sure what "dating someone" means where you live, but where I come from it means getting to know someone better and it's not that bad to have 3-5 dates with two person, but then you should make your decission.
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    Oct 31, 2011 12:26 AM GMT
    Have sex with both and don't bother with dating... seriously you will get more out of it with less emo
  • kevinvt83

    Posts: 2

    Oct 31, 2011 2:24 AM GMT
    I want to say people should value what they have. It'll be very bad once you realize that you just lost the most precious thing you had. But it is very clear that you might not be ready for a serious relationship. If that's so, you should set your current guy free or at least be honest with him about exploring. One more thing, about the "straight" guy, if somebody is willing to break your current relationship in an immoral way (disrespect), do you think he'll be faithful if you two are together? (And yes, there is a moral way to break a relationship, like just being honest about it while being respectful. Encouraging somebody to cheat to break a relationship is definitely not moral) icon_eek.gif
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Oct 31, 2011 2:46 AM GMT
    I would encourage you just to date around and not to commit to just one guy... I think eventually it will become clear with whom you should be involved. When you are ready, it will happen.
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    Oct 31, 2011 3:21 AM GMT
    Dating someone fresh out of the closet is always a bad idea. They need to go through their coming out phase.

    Maybe you are unsure of the guy you are with now.

    I'm so grateful that stuff is no longer part of my life.
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    Oct 31, 2011 3:37 AM GMT
    One thing you need to think about is you are just starting a relationship with a guy and already are wondering if it will be better with another guy. If you feel so strongly about the second guy maybe you let the first one go and take your chance.
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    Oct 31, 2011 9:58 AM GMT
    deltalimen saidDating someone fresh out of the closet is always a bad idea. They need to go through their coming out phase.

    Maybe you are unsure of the guy you are with now.

    I'm so grateful that stuff is no longer part of my life.



    Agree, a fresh new gay out of the closet is like a kid in a candy store, sometimes, so maybe if you just wanna have fun, go on, but usually with that kind of guys never last and is too much drama
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    Nov 02, 2011 4:23 AM GMT
    icon_lol.gif the straight guy sounds like heart breaker to me, now you're in doubt, so i guess you should drop bothicon_biggrin.gif dont try using your intuition and see what you want to doicon_lol.gif
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Nov 02, 2011 4:27 AM GMT
    GVJoe90 saidso few months ago i was on here crying about a guy and low and behold... things are finally better and we are on the right track to beginning a relationship. However, a week ago i was blackout and a guy went hitting on me. He was the ex of one of my girl friends and he just came out of the closet. This guy is basically perfect apparently from what all of my friends say and that we have so much in common and we look good together. well i didnt remember meeting him til i got a txt from him. all week we have been txting and the first night he asked if i was single and i said that i was involved with someone but its not official.(i also told my guy about everything). Flash forward to last night the guy was really flirty and rubbing my leg and he asked so what are our chances of trying the dating thing out? i was speechless and i had to turn him down again and now i feel awful. only reason im not pursuing anything is because i have a thing with my boy now.... but my friends really like this other guy a lot better and it seems we have more in common with each other.


    how have others' situations gone?
    first of all damn, i am trying to find one and you have manage to find two. secondly, how serious are you and the guy you are seeing? if you two are not exclusively dating than i say test the waters. also a piece of advice. there will always be someone hotter than the guy you have that does not mean that they are better
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 02, 2011 4:55 AM GMT
    GVJoe90 saidso few months ago i was on here crying about a guy and low and behold... things are finally better and we are on the right track to beginning a relationship. However, a week ago i was blackout and a guy went hitting on me. He was the ex of one of my girl friends and he just came out of the closet. This guy is basically perfect apparently from what all of my friends say and that we have so much in common and we look good together. well i didnt remember meeting him til i got a txt from him. all week we have been txting and the first night he asked if i was single and i said that i was involved with someone but its not official.(i also told my guy about everything). Flash forward to last night the guy was really flirty and rubbing my leg and he asked so what are our chances of trying the dating thing out? i was speechless and i had to turn him down again and now i feel awful. only reason im not pursuing anything is because i have a thing with my boy now.... but my friends really like this other guy a lot better and it seems we have more in common with each other.


    how have others' situations gone?


    It's this effect that takes place after you lose 20 lbs everyone and their mother wants you.

    LOL just messin.

    Um oh gurl what have you gotten yourself into? Which one do you feel more attracted too?

    The rocky-start-guy or newly-out-of-the-closet-hot-guy?

    What does you heart tell you? Actually always do the opposite of what your heart tells you. That bitch likes to make us hurt sometimes. LOL JKJK!!

    Do what your gut tells you to do.

    There really isn't anything you can do. There are two possible options.

    1. You chose a guy and it ends up being one of the best choices you will ever make.
    Or
    2. You chose a guy and it ends up being wrongf adn so you ruin your chances with both of them.

    Life sucks sometimes. :/