People who say physical attraction isn't important are lying to themselves.!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 07, 2011 8:23 PM GMT
    I'm sick and tired of gay men putting down other men just because they say looks are important to them.! Hello, they're important to everybody.! It's like I always say: "looks attract me to you, but personality makes me stay."

    Think of it like this as well, you wouldn't try to pursue a relationship with someone you didn't find physically attractive IN YOUR EYES, right.? Face it guys, you're attracted to what you see on the outside FIRST.!!! You cannot deny that.

    Who else agrees.?
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    Nov 07, 2011 8:33 PM GMT
    Everyone agrees.


    ./end
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    Nov 07, 2011 8:35 PM GMT
    ThePenIsMyTier saidEveryone agrees.


    ./end


    +10000000000000000
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    Nov 07, 2011 8:46 PM GMT
    TheLetterD saidPeople who say physical attraction isn't important are lying to themselves.!


    They are not only lying to themselves, but to everyone else around them also!
  • wpc56

    Posts: 45

    Nov 07, 2011 8:51 PM GMT
    It matters.

    /end thread

    Goes both ways, I have turn down otherwise perfectly nice guy because I was not physically attracted to them at all (not that they are ugly or anything)
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    Nov 07, 2011 8:52 PM GMT
    I know at least one blind gay man who likes puffy, squishy guys. For him, smell is more important, and a non-gravelly voice.
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    Nov 07, 2011 8:59 PM GMT
    Trollileo said
    mickeytopogigio saidI know at least one blind gay man who likes puffy, squishy guys. For him, smell is more important, and a non-gravelly voice.
    If I were blind, I'd probably want to hear something nice, too.


    wait... your not blind?
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    Nov 07, 2011 9:04 PM GMT
    When people say that, I don't think they mean it as it doesn't matter at all. We all have types that we are attracted to and some types we could not see ourselves dating. What I think people actually mean when they say physical attraction is not important is that we often give that factor too much importance over other qualities.
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    Nov 07, 2011 9:04 PM GMT
    Actually, other exceptions would be:
    -men/women who chose a mate than can feel superior to, in terms of looks.
    -men/women who couple up for financial reasons, even as sub-motivations.

    I've met plenty of gorgeous men/women who seemed mismatched with their partner looks wise...and at some point in the conversation either the less attractive one has the money or the more attractive one likes to be the star of the couple.
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    Nov 07, 2011 9:20 PM GMT
    how-can-i-search-duplicate-files.jpg
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    Nov 07, 2011 9:21 PM GMT
    lol when has anyone ever said that a physical attraction doesn't matter?

    Attaction and physical appearance have really nothing to do with each other, at least not on any sort of universal scale. . .

    For instance, some people are attracted to heavier people, or whatever - it isn't about what society deems to be "sexy" it is about what is individually attractive to any given person, I've been attracted to guys before that none of my friends found to be attractive.

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    Nov 07, 2011 9:29 PM GMT
    The physical does actually take second chair with most guys, I get attracted to a lot of guys based on personality, who they are as a person, how much they make me laugh or smile.

    However if they are ugly as fuck it just aint gonna happen.

    its not that looks arent important it's just that looks aren't the most important thing.

    I've been told before that guys I've dated aren't what someone would expect me to date, but I don't care because really the guys I date, make me smile, they make me laugh, they make me feel comfortable around them and most of all at the end of the day I'm happy.

    although the guy i'm seeing right now phwoar!!!!!! hehehe He's got the looks at the personality!
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    Nov 07, 2011 9:31 PM GMT
    Of course Physical attraction is important .. u know there r some guys .. they look very beautiful ... cute Perfect body and so on .. but u don't feel any attraction to him .. so Physical attraction is important
  • Anto

    Posts: 2035

    Nov 07, 2011 10:46 PM GMT
    Who else agrees.?

    I think so sadly and it affects a lot more than just the ability to have a chance at sex and/or a loving relationship. icon_confused.gif

    If physical attraction wasn't the most important factor then why aren't more gay men in relationships with women or straight men with other guys?
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    Nov 07, 2011 10:49 PM GMT
    TheLetterD saidI'm sick and tired of gay men putting down other men just because they say looks are important to them.! Hello, they're important to everybody.! It's like I always say: "looks attract me to you, but personality makes me stay."

    Think of it like this as well, you wouldn't try to pursue a relationship with someone you didn't find physically attractive IN YOUR EYES, right.? Face it guys, you're attracted to what you see on the outside FIRST.!!! You cannot deny that.

    Who else agrees.?


    Physical attraction happens in the most primal parts of of our brains. You can't fight it. It is what it is.

    However....physical attraction is not everything in a long term relationship.

    Many gay men (and a few straight ones) are anorexic in a vision of attractiveness. Other folks are fat and try to rationalize that it doesn't matter. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder / culture.

    Attractive folks make more money, etc. Facts.
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    Nov 07, 2011 10:55 PM GMT
    Duh.

    Reminds me of a conversation I once had with an ex and some buddies of mine while we hung out at the pool. He was feeling self-conscious for some arcane reason (he probably had just pigged out on junk food) so was complaining that we were all too shallow.

    Eduardo: Guys, I think we need to really examine ourselves. We're too obsessed with looks as gay guys.
    Chris: What are you talking about?
    Eduardo: We spend all this time at the gym trying to look good! I mean, we should really learn to love each other for who we are. We're all beautiful on the inside!
    Me: Baby... this sounds like a fat girl conversation.
    Chris: LOL
    Anthony: LOL
    Eduardo: Guys... Ok sure, it kinda does.

    I'm not sure if it changes the tone of the conversation, but of the guys there I was the one in the worst shape haha.

    Bottom line: we're all a little shallow. Big whup. We're not saints. Physical attraction has to be there for anything to happen.
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    Nov 07, 2011 10:59 PM GMT
    Of course we all want someone who is attractive but honestly for me, it's not the most important thing. I have met guys who would not be considered attractive to most guys but I was so drawn to them by their personality and who they are as a person. How can you ignore this when someone has an affect on you in such a way?
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    Nov 07, 2011 11:31 PM GMT
    I agree.


    Sorta the reason we bother even saying we're homosexual/whatever.
  • Anto

    Posts: 2035

    Nov 07, 2011 11:33 PM GMT
    JakeGHK said

    Attractive folks make more money, etc. Facts.

    I would like to see how people justify the bold.


    These are just some examples in regard to how attractiveness influences people:

    Taller People Earn More MoneyThere's nothing else physically measurable about tall people that explains the salary boost, however, Cohen explained recently on American Public Media's radio program Marketplace. "They're not nicer. They're not prettier. They're not anything else. But they've sort of gotten a halo in society at this point."


    Ugly defendants 'more likely to be found guilty than attractive ones'
    It is thought that the principle applies elsewhere in life, with beauty being associated with kindness, intelligence and sporting ability.
    ...
    The phenomenon, known as the 'halo effect', is thought to extend far beyond the courtroom, with looks affecting an individual's exam marks, job prospects and even ability to make friends.


    Babies prefer to gaze upon beautiful facesAlmost all the babies spent more time looking at the more attractive face than the less attractive one, says Slater, who will be presenting his results at the British Association for the Advancement of Science Festival of Science in Exeter later this week.

    He suggests the reason for this preference is simple - pretty people actually have the prototype of a human face. Researchers have long noted that by melding together hundreds of faces, a statistical average of facial characteristics is reached that happens to be incredibly attractive.

    In a baby's mind, these beautiful faces may represent the stereotypical human face, says Slater, which they have evolved to recognise. Such built-in information helps babies learn quickly including the ability to pair faces with sounds like voices.
  • Anto

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    Nov 07, 2011 11:36 PM GMT
    Soulasphyxi saidI agree.


    Sorta the reason we bother even saying we're homosexual/whatever.


    Yeah exactly.
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    Nov 07, 2011 11:41 PM GMT
    To be totally honest I don't care about looks really all that much...If you have a penis, aren't under 18 or a member of AARP you probably have a chance with me.

    The problem for me has been that I fall for guys with awesome personalities who happen to be attractive too....which is annoying because I really don't care since they usually arent attractive to me. But it means they have lots of options so it's frustrating.
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    Nov 08, 2011 5:39 AM GMT
    Are you assuming that what is physically attractive to you is the same thing that everyone else considers physically attractive.
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    Nov 08, 2011 5:44 AM GMT
    Larkin_PLR saidDuh.

    Me: Baby... this sounds like a fat girl conversation.

    Bottom line: we're all a little shallow. Big whup. We're not saints. Physical attraction has to be there for anything to happen.


    THIS. You've gotta catch someone's interest somehow, and flopping your muffin-top around is not gonna get you anywhere.
  • Anto

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    Nov 08, 2011 9:56 PM GMT
    Ermine saidAre you assuming that what is physically attractive to you is the same thing that everyone else considers physically attractive.


    How many gay men are going to have a relationship with a woman because of her personality/character vs how her body/face looks?