Gay teams - yay or nay.

  • XiongWei

    Posts: 89

    Nov 08, 2011 11:25 AM GMT
    I'm sure this has been done before somewhere , probably multiple times - but i've not seen any while looking through the site yet, so I figure I'll ask the question here.

    What is your opinion on sports teams that are specifically for gay people.

    Me? I'm not sure. I can see that some people would not be comfortable with the idea of joining sports team as it can be difficult to let your team mates know that you are gay. On the other hand I'm not sure I agree with the idea of self segregation. While it's not entirely segregation- I'm sure you understand what I mean. Doesn't it just create further unnecessary divides between a 'straight' community and a 'homosexual' community.

    I am currently playing Rugby on a team where there are two gay players, myself and another player who has been at the club for a lot longer than me (as I am new). Personally, I only feel comfortable with some of the players knowing, and am happier with the idea of remaining anonymous so that I may continue to play without and unnecessary and pointless fuss. The reason I asked the original question however is because I will be leaving the team when I leave the country. When I return home I have two choices- I can join any old rugby team, or I could join the local 'inclusive' rugby team. Now, i'm a completely new player so I am crap, but I love the sport and know that I want to continue. So do I join any old rugby team or join the gay team? Should it make a difference? Does it make a difference? I have no issue being open about who I am when I am back home in manchester, but here in China, it's a different story.

    Thoughts?
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    Nov 08, 2011 12:06 PM GMT
    Personally I'm looking forward to join a gay sport team preferably Volleyball. I think it's a great thing to do: first of all you exercise, you make friends with common interests and also (my main reason) u can meet a potential husband in a healthy environment. In my opinion we as gay guys lack places where we can meet other guys that are not just looking for a hook up, I don't find it serious to meet at a gay club most people are just there for sex, and if I meet someone at a gay club,I always have on the back of my mind the "how often does he go there? Is he doing it again etc.." So for me its a no brainer, I don't really see that much benefits from joining a straight club. Plus people don't seem to realize how hard it is to find a compatible, committed guy. I'm not saying to try to marry whatever comes your way lol but just to get to work icon_smile.gif
  • Dominican_Gen...

    Posts: 379

    Nov 08, 2011 4:30 PM GMT
    robanato saidPersonally I'm looking forward to join a gay sport team preferably Volleyball. I think it's a great thing to do: first of all you exercise, you make friends with common interests and also (my main reason) u can meet a potential husband in a healthy environment. In my opinion we as gay guys lack places where we can meet other guys that are not just looking for a hook up, I don't find it serious to meet at a gay club most people are just there for sex, and if I meet someone at a gay club,I always have on the back of my mind the "how often does he go there? Is he doing it again etc.." So for me its a no brainer, I don't really see that much benefits from joining a straight club. Plus people don't seem to realize how hard it is to find a compatible, committed guy. I'm not saying to try to marry whatever comes your way lol but just to get to work icon_smile.gif

    +1
    I dont play any team sport, but if I did and there was a gay team available it would be a no brainer. You want to rub elbows with like minded individuals. Self segregation be dammed. Now, if they ONLY alowed gay players I would have an issue with it.
  • jim_sf

    Posts: 2094

    Nov 08, 2011 6:25 PM GMT
    XiongWei saidSo do I join any old rugby team or join the gay team? Should it make a difference? Does it make a difference? I have no issue being open about who I am when I am back home in manchester, but here in China, it's a different story.


    I practiced with a straight rugby team for a while. They were very friendly, and they went out of their way to make sure the new players understood what was going on, but I still felt a bit awkward trying to fit in with them. As a result, a friend and I founded a gay* rugby team, and now I can't imagine playing for a straight team in our local union or anywhere else.

    We're still new, and we have a lot of inexperienced players, so we aren't very good yet. (We have lots of potential, though.) However, we've earned a reputation among the other clubs in the union for being tenacious on the pitch and for having the best socials afterwards. That reputation has earned us a lot of respect, and that respect bridges any sort of "divide" that might otherwise be there.

    We also get the rare pleasure of playing other gay clubs from other cities. I can't begin to describe how awesome that is - the matches are always hard-fought, and the third halves are consistently amazing. It's odd to say, but I have such a good time playing other gay clubs that I'm a bit sad for a few days afterwards.

    Speaking more generally, it's easier for people to develop bonds, both individually and as groups, when they have common experiences. Gay teams have common experience built in - the coming-out process, and homophobia, and all that - but potential rookies also know up-front that they won't have to hide anything. That's a tremendous source of strength for us: it helps our new guys feel welcome before they even show up at practice, which in turn helps them bond with our veterans and (I think) makes them more receptive to learning the nuances of the sport.

    It's your choice, ultimately, but I think you should join the gay team.

    *We do have a few straight players, for what it's worth, and I'm glad they're there with us.
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    Nov 08, 2011 6:32 PM GMT
    I think Gay sports team are a great way for gay guys to transition into an athletic life/sports culture, Gay communities usually have a phobia of sports or a lack of experience possibly due to homophobia in sports if they were out and this is great way to reintroduce it to people who never even considered it before.

    Gotta get those homos off the streets and malls and put them to work on the fields!
  • XiongWei

    Posts: 89

    Nov 08, 2011 6:34 PM GMT
    Excellent responses all around , thanks guys for the input! Honestly, I've got a whole year of playing rugby with the current team left so I have plenty of time for thinking about what I eventually intend to do. I imagine that being forced to remain in the closet because of the attitudes of a large portion of the team will probably have an impact on my decision. We'll see I guess!
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    Dec 22, 2011 9:07 AM GMT
    I enjoy playing many sports, and I think only reason I turned my back on most of it was because of the homophobia. I'd prefer an all gay team, just because I think the level of rejection and alienation from heterosexuals, has left me with a bitter resentment I to this day find myself unable to shake. Despite the many straight friends I do have, and I agree with the bumping elbows with another hot guy. I do enjoy sports and there is homo eroticism which I simply couldn't ignore and would prefer to surround myself with people who enjoy the same aspects of it as I.
  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Dec 22, 2011 5:26 PM GMT
    Terrible idea. As bad as as the idea of a sports team "for straight people"...or blonde people for that matter.

    The only thing i want a sports team for is for people who like the sport (and, if competitive and professional, are people who are good at the sport as well). Sexuality should be as much a discriminating factor as skin or hair colour or anything else that has nothing to do with the sport.
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    Dec 22, 2011 5:33 PM GMT
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    Dec 22, 2011 5:47 PM GMT
    I play in two flag football leagues, one gay and one straight. They're both a lot of fun. In my straight league, I'm the only gay player that I know of and no one cares that I'm gay. I guess the other teams don't know but my whole team does and it's no big deal. The gay league here is very inclusive. We have a lot of straight players but it's still definitely a gay league. I think it's easier for some people to join a gay league since they're worried about not being very good or being made fun of. You'll still get made fun of in the gay league but it's different. Seems that a lot of guys are just more comfortable in that setting.

    As far as I'm concerned, whatever gets you out there being active is good.
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    Dec 22, 2011 5:49 PM GMT
    Delivis saidTerrible idea. As bad as as the idea of a sports team "for straight people"...or blonde people for that matter.

    The only thing i want a sports team for is for people who like the sport (and, if competitive and professional, are people who are good at the sport as well). Sexuality should be as much a discriminating factor as skin or hair colour or anything else that has nothing to do with the sport.


    No one is prevented to join the team, its just the focus is the LGBT community. I play WP here in SF and many people are straight and dont care. At the same time, I have many friends from the common experience. Great way to meet other gay peeps.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Dec 22, 2011 5:52 PM GMT
    Until we as a whole stop leading with our sexuality we will always need gay leagues or bar or restaurants. at the end of the day we are all human beings. if you try just being yourself most of the time people could care less what you prefer sexually. i mean you will always have a few idiots but at the end of the day most do not care if you are gay.
  • daveindenver

    Posts: 314

    Dec 22, 2011 6:02 PM GMT
    Ask yourself.......am I joining this team sport cos I xbot to play ? Or am I joining this gay team sport cos I don't have the confidence to join a straight team...or cos I'm husband shopping ?
  • jim_sf

    Posts: 2094

    Dec 22, 2011 6:04 PM GMT
    Chainers said
    Delivis saidTerrible idea. As bad as as the idea of a sports team "for straight people"...or blonde people for that matter.

    The only thing i want a sports team for is for people who like the sport (and, if competitive and professional, are people who are good at the sport as well). Sexuality should be as much a discriminating factor as skin or hair colour or anything else that has nothing to do with the sport.


    No one is prevented to join the team, its just the focus is the LGBT community. I play WP here in SF and many people are straight and dont care. At the same time, I have many friends from the common experience. Great way to meet other gay peeps.


    This. My team doesn't turn away willing players just because they're straight; we just focus our recruiting efforts on gay and bisexual men.
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    Dec 22, 2011 6:07 PM GMT
    I think it depends on your goal. If you are looking for something to do with other gay guys with similar interests, then having gay leagues/teams are totally fine and something you shouldn't have any problem with joining.

    If, however, you're just really into a specific sport and above all, just want to play with the best and be competitive, you should prioritize your search around the sport versus the characteristics of the team.
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    Dec 22, 2011 6:13 PM GMT
    daveindenver saidAsk yourself.......am I joining this team sport cos I xbot to play ? Or am I joining this gay team sport cos I don't have the confidence to join a straight team...or cos I'm husband shopping ?


    Cause you xbot to play? Cant we require that people get a high school education before posting?
  • ohioguy12

    Posts: 2024

    Dec 22, 2011 6:13 PM GMT
    I think the "gay" factor can be a little overrated. I joined a gay basketball league in October, and the topics regarding sexuality, dating, hooking up ect. have never been a topic of conversation. I talk to them just as I would on a straight team.
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    Dec 22, 2011 6:14 PM GMT
    I don't necessarily think it is about self-segregation. . .I think it is an attempt to find a sense of community in an organized sport, nothing wrong with it at all.
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    Dec 22, 2011 6:23 PM GMT
    Think they're awesome.
  • easterndude69

    Posts: 632

    Feb 11, 2012 5:45 AM GMT
    I'm good with either. I might prefer a gay team though to find a potential date and to ease in connecting with them and making good like-minded friends.
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    Feb 11, 2012 5:53 AM GMT
    i think it depends on what you want to do....if your looking to socialize with other gay men and just have fun playing rugby then join the gay team. if you are looking to get better at rugby and win then join whichever of the two teams is a more skilled team.
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    Feb 11, 2012 6:05 AM GMT
    I look forward to joining any gay teams/sports available to me in Charleston! I don't mind a mixed group of gay/straight or male/female/tranny either. What better way to learn how to be able to play/work alongside peers and those different from you; than be thrown into a unified collective with a single goal in mind?