Gay acting/Str8 acting

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 31, 2008 4:57 PM GMT
    So here's the thing. I have a problem with the straight acting thing. I know what guys mean is that they're not feminine acting. But look at your gay friends and see how many are masculine. Why isn't that gay acting?
    I'm gay acting.
    I'm gay, I'm masculine, I'm just being me- therefore I'm gay acting. Why do the straight guys get all the glory?
    Confused in Vancouver
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    May 31, 2008 5:07 PM GMT
    Well, I dunno, there, Confused in Vancouver.

    I think you gotta come over to my house in those aussiebums and demonstrate how gay acting you can be.





    How my house got in those aussiebums, I will never know. -- Groucho Marx ... icon_rolleyes.gif
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    May 31, 2008 6:32 PM GMT
    "Act" means more than 'portray' or 'simulate.' It also refers to behavior, as in, "How would a person be liable to act after being told that . . ."

    Straight-acting, in my opinion, means able to pass for heterosexual, which is a valuable skill when, for example, walking through a group of aggressive teenagers, or teaching in a conservative community.

    The other benefit of being "straight-acting" is that, I believe, most gay men prefer "straight-acting" men.

    Now why would that be the case?
  • vindog

    Posts: 1440

    May 31, 2008 7:01 PM GMT
    Semantics............






    merp






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    May 31, 2008 7:42 PM GMT
    Straight people ask if I am gay. Gay people ask if I am straight. Then both say "oh, you're straight acting." No... I am not acting at all, but why argue there is no winning that one. I tell them that I came out once and it was enough, so call it what they like, but this is me no pretending.

    I don't like it, but it is human nature to want to categorize others into groups that they understand and with which they identify. I don't let it get to me... Well it did last night, a little, when the hot guy at the table next to me thought I was straight. So, I don't let it get to me often.

    Think about this... the straight version of "straight acting" is "metro."
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    May 31, 2008 8:01 PM GMT
    I think it has a dual meaning.

    One, you don't affect an attitude change, and do not appear to be Gay to the general populace.

    Two, you affect an attitude change so as NOT to be identified as Gay by the general populace.


    I fall under One, I'm 'straight acting' but don't do any acting. The term itself is bullshit, it's a part of the stereotype that all gays have a lisp, limp wrists, don't like bugs, are feminine and generally wusses. So 'str8 acting' was born to label gays who don't properly fit into preconceived notions of homosexuals.

    Some gays appear to be 'straight', others affect a demeanor to prevent from being identified as gay.

    If I grew up around a large gay community I may have adopted or mimicked certain stereotypical gay traits, but I didn't. I grew up in my father's gun shop listening to war stories and hunting tales.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    May 31, 2008 8:03 PM GMT
    I'm me acting.
  • cityguy39

    Posts: 967

    May 31, 2008 8:04 PM GMT
    Gents, masculinity is so relative in regards to race, social class etc, what's masculine to one man can be considered feminine with the next.

    Doug
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    May 31, 2008 8:04 PM GMT
    Timberoo saidI'm me acting.


    Semantics! It's actions or Acting! Sit, roll over.. good boy! ::throws a frikin' bone::icon_razz.gif
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    May 31, 2008 8:06 PM GMT
    Buckwheet said[quote][cite]Timberoo said[/cite]I'm me acting.


    Semantics! It's actions or Acting! Sit, roll over.. good boy! ::throws a frikin' bone::icon_razz.gif[/quote]

    rub my belly
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    May 31, 2008 8:09 PM GMT
    ::rub rub::

    Red rocket!
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    May 31, 2008 8:11 PM GMT
    :kicks leg:
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 01, 2008 12:07 AM GMT
    I have never been asked by people whether I am gay (not since university anyways), but gays sometimes wonder if I am secretly straight. I ignore everybody and keep on truckin'.
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    Jun 01, 2008 12:32 AM GMT
    Mannerisms are a funny thing. They vary greatly from one part of the world to another, and even from one part of the USA to another. It depends on the local persona. What's butch in one place may be considered fruity in another.

    When I moved to California from Texas, I thought about 80% of the guys I met were gay. The way they spoke and acted (I mean "behaved", semantics Nazis), if they were in Texas, there would have been no question that they were gay. But in truth, they were virtually all straight. And in California, they were all considered to be "straight-acting". Obviously "straight-acting" is defined differently in California and Texas.

    To me, "gay-acting" means you're giving clues to your sexuality in your speech or body language. It's not necessarily effeminate, and it's not necessarily a conscious effort - most guys, no matter if they're gay or straight, simply adopt the mannerisms of the people they hang around with. But a subtle inflection in speech or a posture of the body can telegraph sexuality. "Straight-acting" - or maybe we should more genuinely call it "straight-appearing" - is simply the absence of those clues. And it's no big surprise that a large number of gays prefer "straight-appearing" men - considering that's how all the male role models we've been subjected to our entire lives have acted. Guys like Richard Simmons don't get cast to play Indiana Jones.
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    Jun 01, 2008 12:33 AM GMT
    guys who act feminine or like a girl, or have to let the whole world know that they're gay when in public, really turn me off. i'm totally gay and have been my whole life. in fact, i've never had intercourse with a woman. i'm a country boy that's masculine and that's what i desire in a man. if i wanted a woman, i'd date one. ---mark
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    Jun 01, 2008 12:42 AM GMT
    I don't "act" straight and I don't "act" gay. I am Dennis and I act exactly how Dennis is suppose to act.

    -Den
  • Mman19

    Posts: 25

    Jun 01, 2008 12:45 AM GMT
    riptjock saidMannerisms are a funny thing. They vary greatly from one part of the world to another, and even from one part of the USA to another. It depends on the local persona. What's butch in one place may be considered fruity in another.

    When I moved to California from Texas, I thought about 80% of the guys I met were gay. The way they spoke and acted (I mean "behaved", semantics Nazis), if they were in Texas, there would have been no question that they were gay. But in truth, they were virtually all straight. And in California, they were all considered to be "straight-acting". Obviously "straight-acting" is defined differently in California and Texas.

    To me, "gay-acting" means you're giving clues to your sexuality in your speech or body language. It's not necessarily effeminate, and it's not necessarily a conscious effort - most guys, no matter if they're gay or straight, simply adopt the mannerisms of the people they hang around with. But a subtle inflection in speech or a posture of the body can telegraph sexuality. "Straight-acting" - or maybe we should more genuinely call it "straight-appearing" - is simply the absence of those clues. And it's no big surprise that a large number of gays prefer "straight-appearing" men - considering that's how all the male role models we've been subjected to our entire lives have acted. Guys like Richard Simmons don't get cast to play Indiana Jones.


    Totally agree with you and kudos on the Richard Simmons joke. icon_smile.gif
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    Jun 01, 2008 1:19 AM GMT
    I tend to associate 'masculine' as a self descriptor as an attribute that I find attractive.

    When I see 'straight acting', the attribute that is presented is homophobia. I don't want to be with someone who'd rather be straight or lacks the self confidence to be themselves (whatever that may be) in public.

    I'd rather spend my energy living my life rather than acting one out.
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    Jun 01, 2008 1:30 AM GMT
    bgcat57 saidI tend to associate 'masculine' as a self descriptor as an attribute that I find attractive.

    When I see 'straight acting', the attribute that is presented is homophobia. T don't want to be with someone who'd rather be straight or lacks the self confidence to be themselves (whatever that may be) in public.

    I'd rather spend my energy living my life rather than acting one out.



    im not sure where you've been bg but we've already established the fact that strat acting doesn't mean affecting a heterosexual demeanor. As to being "yourself" in public, you don't see heterosexuals making sexual inuendos every chance they get. Sexuality doesn't define your life, it's just a part of it. icon_neutral.gif
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    Jun 01, 2008 1:31 AM GMT
    This really isn't about sexuality at all, it's about the boundaries of perceived gender, which is a whole different subject, but one that is often confused with sexuality itself.

    Our culture despises women, and the feminine in general. You see it in the gay community as a mad rush to define oneself as "str8". You see it in the jokes about bottoms--when was the last time you heard a joke about a top? The "feminine" sexual position is considered inferior. You see it in comments like the one above: "If I wanted a woman, I'd date one." Well, pardon me, but I've met dykes who could rip you to pieces. Are you saying that you'd date someone like her? After all, she's more "masculine" than almost anyone here would care to be.

    Misogyny in the gay community really annoys the crap out of me.
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    Jun 01, 2008 1:52 AM GMT
    The only problem with a juiced dyke is that fighting ability does not equal male. Can't get around the fact that he likes his MEN, not guys who affect female behavior.( guys with a need desire to over "beautify" themselves)icon_neutral.gif

    I already don't care for preconceived "gay" sexual positions but if you don't want to be ridiculed for being a bottom, don't be one.

    So yeah, we're not on RealJock because we want to date women so I don't think there's anything wrong with saying so. (note: being naturally emphatic doesn't equal feminine)
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    Jun 01, 2008 2:00 AM GMT
    in my case, there no acting at all, being closeted i always performed like an straight, at the level when i came out to my best friend, he told me "you are joking, right?" i needed to say him twice to get me serious. "Yeah, i am gay"....

    in other hand, so many straight men when get drunk like to cross to the dark side.... it happened to me that when i drink i enjoy to flirt to women, but thats all just flirt... btw im not bi.

    well... about the acting thing i think that people need to be who they are, the society have just enough pressure among us to add another one.

    my advice: be yourself!
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    Jun 01, 2008 2:03 AM GMT
    RyanReBoRn saidThe only problem with a juiced dyke is that fighting ability does not equal male. Can't get around the fact that he likes his MEN, not guys who affect female behavior.( guys with a need desire to over "beautify" themselves)icon_neutral.gif

    I already don't care for preconceived "gay" sexual positions but if you don't want to be ridiculed for being a bottom, don't be one.

    So yeah, we're not on RealJock because we want to date women so I don't think there's anything wrong with saying so. (note: being naturally emphatic doesn't equal feminine)


    This response misses the entire point.
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    Jun 01, 2008 2:18 AM GMT
    RyanReBoRn said

    im not sure where you've been bg but we've already established the fact that strat acting doesn't mean affecting a heterosexual demeanor. As to being "yourself" in public, you don't see heterosexuals making sexual inuendos every chance they get. Sexuality doesn't define your life, it's just a part of it. icon_neutral.gif


    I was simply stating my own perception of how I view it. I also don't think that it was established that 'straight acting doesn't mean affecting a heterosexual demeanor.' Sexuality doesn't define your life is accurate, but it is a culturally ingrained attribute. It's not an attribute like blood type. There is a powerful indoctrination from birth that we are all subject to. We are only starting to see gay role models (not all good) in society (advertising, news, entertainment). Straights don't need to make sexual innuendos every chance they get (though many do) since they are allowed to make sexual gestures, no matter how benign or innocent without a thought of repercussion.
    Outside of a fully gay friendly environment, would you feel comfortable just holding your boyfriends hand or giving him a gentle peck on the cheek without some fear or even a feeling of defiance if you were in downtown Salt Lake City (as an example)?
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    Jun 01, 2008 4:00 AM GMT
    Jp, be specific. I'm not going to believe it' a swing and a miss just because you say so. icon_rolleyes.gif

    And bg, I meant established in this thread, sorry for being vague. As for showing affection, I live in Houston Texas where it's not out of line to squeeze a guys shoulders or bicep when you feel like it. I'm GUESSING my straight friends are straight but they sure do give some good shoulder massages icon_redface.gificon_biggrin.gif

    Also, I've never been to Salt Lake City but since you're referencing that city it must be pretty fundamental...icon_eek.gif