BF says "You're the One" but is afraid

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    Nov 30, 2011 7:32 AM GMT
    My BF and I are in an open relationship and just today he sent me a text saying, "I think you're the one and that scares the shit out of me!"

    I replied saying "One day at a time." And Didn't get a response back.

    So right now I'm just wondering what he meant by that.

    Any thoughts?
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Nov 30, 2011 7:35 AM GMT
    dramaicon_idea.gif
    dump him.
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    Nov 30, 2011 7:54 AM GMT
    wut
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    Nov 30, 2011 1:07 PM GMT
    You should have replied, yeah scares the shit Outta me too considering i'm not even close to feeling that yet... lol. U would have gotten a reply fo sho.
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    Nov 30, 2011 1:19 PM GMT
    You're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Nov 30, 2011 1:34 PM GMT
    I think your "one day at a time" is a good response... but the reason you didn't get a response back was he made an emotional remark..... and you responded with a "logical" one. Maybe not what he wanted to hear, but
    I think it was a good comment.

    He's certainly into you. Not sure how long you guys have been together, but I you have some changing years ahead.... hope it all goes well for you.
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    Nov 30, 2011 2:34 PM GMT


    I swear shiny toy guns is like hallmark. They have a song for every topic ever in life. Here's yours icon_wink.gif
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    Nov 30, 2011 2:46 PM GMT
    Larkin_PLR saidYou're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!


    subtext is so hard too read. They're usually in fine print. I don't like reading them. At all. Why can't people just say what they mean and mean what they say. Damn.

    When I say I like someone, that means I like him. Not " I sorta like him but not really in that way, or that I find him hot but I don't really find him adorable, or I think he'd a good BF and would be horrible if I scare myself shitless if I fall for him and shit and stuff like that. "

    Why make it so complicated? I think as a bttm I think more like a guy more thab most tops.
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    Nov 30, 2011 2:49 PM GMT
    waimea said
    Larkin_PLR saidYou're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!


    subtext is so hard too read. They're usually in fine print. I don't like reading them. At all. Why can't people just say what they mean and mean what they say. Damn.

    When I say I like someone, that means I like him. Not " I sorta like him but not really in that way, or that I find him hot but I don't really find him adorable, or I think he'd a good BF and would be horrible if I scare myself shitless if I fall for him and shit and stuff like that. "

    Why make it so complicated? I think as a bttm I think more like a guy more thab most tops.


    Everyone's got their own brand of subtext. Most people don't even know what theirs is.
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    Nov 30, 2011 2:51 PM GMT
    dekiruman said
    waimea said
    Larkin_PLR saidYou're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!


    subtext is so hard too read. They're usually in fine print. I don't like reading them. At all. Why can't people just say what they mean and mean what they say. Damn.

    When I say I like someone, that means I like him. Not " I sorta like him but not really in that way, or that I find him hot but I don't really find him adorable, or I think he'd a good BF and would be horrible if I scare myself shitless if I fall for him and shit and stuff like that. "

    Why make it so complicated? I think as a bttm I think more like a guy more thab most tops.


    Everyone's got their own brand of subtext. Most people don't even know what theirs is.


    Just like you dunno yours?

    ??
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    Nov 30, 2011 2:56 PM GMT
    He probably meant he really likes you but:

    1) he's not sure if he's ready to settle down
    2) he's afraid that he loves you so much that he might get hurt say if things don't work out in the future

    and that's why he's scared in my humble opinion.
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    Nov 30, 2011 3:58 PM GMT
    Larkin_PLR saidYou're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!
    Don't judge.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Nov 30, 2011 3:59 PM GMT
    tru_guy saidMy BF and I are in an open relationship and just today he sent me a text saying, "I think you're the one and that scares the shit out of me!"

    I replied saying "One day at a time." And Didn't get a response back.

    So right now I'm just wondering what he meant by that.

    Any thoughts?
    ha ha ha are you kidding me? you can not be that dense. or can you?
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    Nov 30, 2011 4:02 PM GMT
    you want to know what it means, ask him not us, you know him better, i think he will give you a better answer. if you try to interpret what it means then you will over think it and go crazy.icon_surprised.gif
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    Nov 30, 2011 8:40 PM GMT
    I love him alot, and I'm glad he feels that way. I just don't want him to be scared.

    I'm afraid I might lose him or something. That's why I didn't want to say something like "I love you" back or get all mushy mushy.
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    Nov 30, 2011 8:43 PM GMT
    waimea said
    dekiruman said
    waimea said
    Larkin_PLR saidYou're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!


    subtext is so hard too read. They're usually in fine print. I don't like reading them. At all. Why can't people just say what they mean and mean what they say. Damn.

    When I say I like someone, that means I like him. Not " I sorta like him but not really in that way, or that I find him hot but I don't really find him adorable, or I think he'd a good BF and would be horrible if I scare myself shitless if I fall for him and shit and stuff like that. "

    Why make it so complicated? I think as a bttm I think more like a guy more thab most tops.


    Everyone's got their own brand of subtext. Most people don't even know what theirs is.


    Just like you dunno yours?

    ??


    exactly.
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    Nov 30, 2011 8:53 PM GMT
    jpBITCHva said
    waimea saidWhen I say I like someone, that means I like him

    When I say I like someone, it means that I have no immediate plans to dismember him.
    When I say I like someone, it means I already dismembered him, cooked him, and ate him. icon_twisted.gif
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    Dec 01, 2011 1:33 AM GMT
    He's entertaining thoughts of "closing" the relationship and was trying to feel you out.
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    Dec 01, 2011 1:41 AM GMT
    Oh please, no one gets scared if they feel the person is the one. To me it sounds like one of those kids who say all the right things but their actions are lacking.

    I say good answer. A bad answer would be to say, "I think you're the one too!"

    Someone has to have a level head in the relationship. To pump the brakes when necessary and not get caught up too quickly. And seems like you do.
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    Dec 01, 2011 1:41 AM GMT
    MikemikeMike saiddramaicon_idea.gif
    dump him.
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    Dec 01, 2011 1:49 AM GMT
    tru_guy saidMy BF and I are in an open relationship and just today he sent me a text saying, "I think you're the one and that scares the shit out of me!"

    I replied saying "One day at a time." And Didn't get a response back.

    So right now I'm just wondering what he meant by that.

    Any thoughts?



    My personal view is that when it comes to "the one" you don't "think" somebody is. You'd know. I'd say be sensitive to how he feels but take what he says with a grain of salt. It is as many here have said, dramatic, and not worth your time. Obviously something feels unnatural with him if he is questioning how he feels; not about you though, just life in general and if he's willing to commit if he is being truthful. From an outside perspective it seems like he is stringing you along just to keep you around.

    Best of luck to you.

    -J
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    Dec 01, 2011 1:52 AM GMT
    Your reply to him sounds like a wall. If you meant wall, then you did great. But if you meant "I think you're the one too," then Oh Hell.
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    Dec 01, 2011 2:06 AM GMT
    jfierce90 said
    My personal view is that when it comes to "the one" you don't "think" somebody is. You'd know. I'd say be sensitive to how he feels but take what he says with a grain of salt.


    That's why I said good answer. You don't 'think' someone is the one and feel scared. To me that's not a confession of love...that's head games.

    That could mean a thousand things.
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    Dec 01, 2011 2:08 AM GMT
    mochamuscle said
    jfierce90 said
    My personal view is that when it comes to "the one" you don't "think" somebody is. You'd know. I'd say be sensitive to how he feels but take what he says with a grain of salt.


    That's why I said good answer. You don't 'think' someone is the one and feel scared. To me that's not a confession of love...that's head games.

    That could mean a thousand things.



    mochamuscle: haha way to make what I said all about you! icon_eek.gif
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    Dec 01, 2011 2:48 AM GMT
    Larkin_PLR saidYou're 21 and already in an open relationship... and your boyfriend says you're the one (but, subtext: I just finished fucking some random).

    Yeah... sounds like a recipe for Happily Ever After!


    +1