Dec 04, 2011 5:32 AM GMT
First let me start off saying that this is my first post and i'm a little nervous...but here it goes. Well within the last few months I have begun a relationship with an older guy who means a lot to me. Our time spent together is great and I know I'm a better person when I'm around him. Well this guy I'm dating is twice my age and he is White (I'm black). We've expressed our feelings to one another and we seem perfect together but there are some issues that are beginning to make me nervous about our relationship. He questions the "age difference" and "generational difference" a lot and expresses to me that he thinks that is the biggest issue we face down the road. I guess I'm a little more passive about it bc i don't let things like that bother me, I just focus on enjoying the "now." When he expresses these doubts in our relationship, I get very nervous bc I feel he is almost giving up before even trying. He tries to reassure me that these issues don't have anything to do with me in particular but its just something he has to work through and to just give him time and be patient. I think the only time i become vulnerable is when he begins to talk like this because I really want the relationship to work. Any advice or suggestions on how I should respond the next time this doubt comes up again? In general I tell him that he has nothing to be afraid of because i'm not going anywhere. In a sense I understand what he is trying to express, that basically my life and career are just beginning and his are starting to end...It makes me a little sad but like I said I try to enjoy the present. P.S; Watching J.E. Hoover last night at the movies did not help at all bc it basically reiterated the challenge of being in a relationship with someone and losing them later on in life.