Ace123 saidSo I just got through talking to my mom as we talk every Sunday. Apparently, while I was home for Thanksgiving, I accidently left this site up while I was checking my email before I came back home and my mom saw it!
She asked me I was on the site and if there was anything I needed to tell her, of course I said no, but she kept asking and saying that I could always talk to her.
Eventually, I admitted to it and she said while she didn't understand she still loved me. She said she has known for a while, but was waiting on me.
However, for some reason I feel horrible and like she is disappointed in me and is just not telling me! What makes it worse is that I am going back home in a couple of weeks for Christmas and now I don't even want to go. I feel like I can't face her!
Get over it. You're gay. Moms know this shit. Does it matter? Fuck no. Get on with your life.
Unless you're fucking your mom, is does not matter. There are 7 billion folks in The World. You being gay isn't that big of deal....Seriously.
You're 27. Time to put on your big boy pants. Does mom need to know? No. Does she know? Sure. Everyone knows you're gay...but.. YOU.
It's dark in that closet with The Boogie Man. Get on with your life. At 27, being a closet case is just plain stupid.
Write on a piece of paper, two columns. Pros and Cons of being a closet case. Do the math. Then, get on with life.
Stop with the self-loathing / low esteem CRAP. The enemy is within. The enemy is YOU. Give yourself permission to like yourself, and get on with life.
For many of us, Chuckystud, coming out to our parents IS a big deal and it DOES matter. Whether you're 17, 27, or 57, the anticipation and dealing with the reaction of our parents and family is a milestone in many of our lives.
I don't where you come up with this "self-loathing" bullshit. Don't downplay his anxiety of his circumstance - you aren't doing him any help with that.
Ace, for your Mom to tell you that she doesn't understand but loves you anyway... it is a common response by many loving and, ultimately, accepting parents. Not to worry... You're in a good spot.
She says she knew but was waiting for you to tell her? Chuckystud was right with that one... In many instances Moms DO know long before you come out to them.
Your concern about being a disappointment is an understandable reaction on your part, too. Many of us have felt that way. But before long, you'll find she is much more accepting of you than you could have ever hoped for. She's your Mom for Christssake.
Many gay men would be happy to have this level of acceptance right off the line. All is good.
Few people's coming out stories meet any kind of "ideal" situation. There is none. It's always a minefield for everyone. Even Chuckystud I'll bet.
And go home for Christmas with a smile of pride on your face for getting through coming out to your Mom, regardless of how it happened to come about. I guarantee it... She wants you there.