Making peace without surrendering and keeping your sanity....is there a way?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 06, 2011 6:29 AM GMT
    For my entire life I have suffered from SAD, depression, obesity and a deep seated dislike of "The Holidays", particularly from Thanksgiving thru New Year's.
    I am being treated for my SAD and depression, have had bariatric surgery and have lost over 200 lbs, fight with balancing diet, exercise and life, but I find the holidays to be a major demon for me every year. For me, It is the worst time of the year, every year....wall-to-wall food festivals at work, at home and with friends, it is DARK, with a minimum of sunlight, I feel trapped inside because of inclement weather and well, I tend to be a solitary man, forced to be around alot of people....All I want to do SLEEP...HIBERNATE! Give me the carbs and a nap until April...
    Every year at this time I hate my job, hate the stores, hate traffic, hate the scale and hate crowds that expect me to be "jolly" and eating all the incredible foods they cook or buy...... All this food to a person with a food addiction is like an alcoholic or drug addict having a hit daily.....torture and guilt and pain and gluttony....I hate it!

    I used to fake a smile and put up with the season's BS....but I am older and the kids are grown.....tired of putting on a front, I just don't participate in the gift exchanges or the office pot lucks and try to go south for some sun and outdoors......but still, running from the problem is BS....and it just doesn't feel like a comprehensive way to care for myself with these individual and isolated treatments.....my coworkers dont understand, are always asking me questions and I am not interested in answering or participating...
    After 51 years...I am looking for a better way.....I have never found a way to make peace with my demons and I am tired of the fight.....I do meds, counseling, light-box, travel, try to make it meaningful to me....but the results are the same...FUCK IT!....I am just short of checking in for a short hospital stay.....with rubber walls and butterfly nets......Is there a secret that someone can tell me? I have rope, but don't know how to tie knots.....(j/k)....no this is not looking for a Charlie Brown Christmas answer from Linus......just some advice from someone that gets it. icon_sad.gificon_rolleyes.gif
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    Dec 06, 2011 3:21 PM GMT
    Go do some volunteering with an organization whose work and mission resonates with you.

    For example, I work as a volunteer translator with a refugee resettlement program here in Denver that helps people from Somalia learn English and find work and housing.

    Working with people who are homeless, jobless, HIV positive, or have moved to this country from a war torn shithole has a way of making our pitifully small problems seem just that - pitifully small.

    Also, you could realize that you live in the United States, have a job and internet access and access to healthcare.

    I'm gonna pray for your whiny ass.

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    Dec 07, 2011 6:01 AM GMT
    Haaretz saidGo do some volunteering with an organization whose work and mission resonates with you.

    For example, I work as a volunteer translator with a refugee resettlement program here in Denver that helps people from Somalia learn English and find work and housing.

    Working with people who are homeless, jobless, HIV positive, or have moved to this country from a war torn shithole has a way of making our pitifully small problems seem just that - pitifully small.

    Also, you could realize that you live in the United States, have a job and internet access and access to healthcare.

    I'm gonna pray for your whiny ass.



    Thanks for relaying your good deeds and GOOD FOR YOU for having found your calling that gives your life meaning. REALLY, congrats!
    Please save your prayers for someone else that wants them and values them....my "whiny ass" doesn't. Shalom.