When a guy is sooo into you, do you...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 09, 2008 10:55 AM GMT
    ...become cold?
    ...lose interest?
    ...shut down completely?
    ...move on to the next?
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    Jun 09, 2008 11:08 AM GMT
    If by "sooo you into you" you mean text you constantly, message you on facebook/myspace constantly, get upset when you don't respond instantly - and this is all after 4 days of correspondence and never having met face to face.

    So I have shut down completely.

    It's flattering to be chased... but not to this extent.
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    Jun 09, 2008 11:11 AM GMT
    Add to it ending each phone call with "I love you."
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    Jun 09, 2008 11:22 AM GMT
    He's not really in love with me if that's the case. If he persists so much into shoving his affection down my throat, I'd puke.

    I'd like more considerate guys who try to respect your OWN feelings rather than theirs. Who gently shows his love. Who cuddles with you on a cold day rather than insist on setting himself on fire to warm you. Who just smiles and you quietly instead of flooding you with a thousand I love yous. Who calls to see if you're alright and not because he wanted you to know that he loves you for the gazillionth time. Who...

    *sighs and goes starry eyed*
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    Jun 09, 2008 3:21 PM GMT
    zimster said...become cold?
    ...lose interest?
    ...shut down completely?
    ...move on to the next?


    good question

    there's the sexy "when I see something I like I go after it" kinda of interest....that's good. When the guy is kind and considerate...smart and not a cheapskate. Plus, he has reason to toot his own horn because he has integrity and treats you like an equal and vica versa.

    Then there is the guy who is soooo into you it comes off as being needy and infatuated.The kind of guy who adores tooo much, sees a prize catch and considers you just what he wants and needs, with no consideration for how you feel or your individuality. In this case, I shut down. In this case, I usually hear how much of a selfish snobby narcisistic spoiled brat I am.
  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Jun 09, 2008 3:27 PM GMT
    Sedative saidHe's not really in love with me if that's the case. If he persists so much into shoving his affection down my throat, I'd puke.

    I'd like more considerate guys who try to respect your OWN feelings rather than theirs. Who gently shows his love. Who cuddles with you on a cold day rather than insist on setting himself on fire to warm you. Who just smiles and you quietly instead of flooding you with a thousand I love yous. Who calls to see if you're alright and not because he wanted you to know that he loves you for the gazillionth time. Who...

    *sighs and goes starry eyed*



    That is a really good point..... I have had both.


    People in love will show it in their own special way.... being neurotic about it is NOT love but obsession.
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    Jun 09, 2008 4:04 PM GMT
    zimster said...become cold?
    ...lose interest?
    ...shut down completely?
    ...move on to the next?


    this never happens to me, so i cant answer this.

    Next.
  • auryn

    Posts: 2061

    Jun 09, 2008 4:06 PM GMT
    Since it's Pride Month, aren't you just supposed to throw him a pitty fuck?

    Maybe I've been in a relationship too long to remember what to do or watched to much of the US version of Queer As Folk, but I thought that's what was supposed to happen. icon_wink.gif
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    Jun 09, 2008 9:00 PM GMT
    Grab his ass and take him to bed...then call me in the morning.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jun 09, 2008 9:42 PM GMT
    I'm assuming that ... you're not

    depends on if the guys a nice guy or not

    If you don't want to hurt him you need to be direct
    and tell him that he's a great guy and that it just won't work

    if he's a pest...anything that'll get rid of him will do
    just don't answer his calls
    or tell him that you found a BF

    LOL... I've used my bestfriend for that lots of times
    icon_wink.gif
  • joeindallas

    Posts: 484

    Jun 09, 2008 10:12 PM GMT
    or as some might do here cock tease them
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    Jun 09, 2008 10:18 PM GMT
    joeindallas saidor as some might do here cock tease them

    That's just mean.icon_wink.gif
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jun 10, 2008 10:47 AM GMT
    Ugh... no
    That'll just turn him into a stalker
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    Jun 10, 2008 11:54 AM GMT
    zimster said...become cold?
    ...lose interest?
    ...shut down completely?
    ...move on to the next?


    Try to get him naked, provided he's not a crazy stalker type who'll leave dead animals at your door step if you don't ask for marriage after the first encounter.
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    Jun 10, 2008 12:33 PM GMT
    For heavens sake! If You don't feel the same way just tell the gay how you feel above all be honest and that does not make you a bad person it makes you an honest person! If you think by saying nothing you are off the hook TRUST! You are not that could lead to an even bigger confrontation later on.

    Just be honest! The doge ball tactic is far worse!

    MAN UP!icon_rolleyes.gif

    He will appreciate your being honest lot more than you not!

    Just tell him how you feel. It's call open and honest communication...GOD LORD!
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    Jun 10, 2008 12:54 PM GMT
    now you know. The best thing about having a fat person sitting on your face is......You can't hear em say: I love you....
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    Jun 10, 2008 4:40 PM GMT
    From what I have observed of my peers, when a guy is given the choice between a gorgeous person who is totally [overly] smitten with him and an average looking person who may have shown some interest but is hard to get...he skips the former and goes for the chase.

    When someone monopolizes expression of feelings, he/she doesn't allow room for the other to invest any emotional energy into supposed relationship and leaves little motivation to continue.

    - Naive and Inexperienced
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    Jun 10, 2008 8:01 PM GMT
    Ducky44 saidFor heavens sake! If You don't feel the same way just tell the gay how you feel above all be honest and that does not make you a bad person it makes you an honest person! If you think by saying nothing you are off the hook TRUST! You are not that could lead to an even bigger confrontation later on.

    Just be honest! The doge ball tactic is far worse!

    MAN UP!icon_rolleyes.gif

    He will appreciate your being honest lot more than you not!

    Just tell him how you feel. It's call open and honest communication...GOD LORD!


    I use to take that approach for awhile until I ran into a stalker type.

    A little incite; Met the guy for a drink after we talked for a bit on the phone. Let to dinner and my place. It got hot and heavy and afterwards during cuddling he said "I love you." After 1 official date. I didnt know how to respond except to tell the truth I didnt feel the same.

    Next thing I know he is calling everyday, leaving me emails etc. Even sent flowers to my job, which i never told him where i worked. After that and a few more incidents I got the police involved.

    Suffice to say I run background checks on all prospects and if it was going to be a hookup we meet at a hotel and I pay in cash keeping all identification in my sight. I limit my information that I exchange including cellphones, prepaid cells work well.

    Not that all men who say I love you after the first date are insane but they are crazy none the less. Maybe they just confuse sex with love I dont know, I dont ask i just leave.
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    Jun 10, 2008 8:05 PM GMT
    It depends on what you want out of it?
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    Jun 10, 2008 10:08 PM GMT
    I've been on both sides of this - and definitely think the better way is to just be honest and upfront about it.

    If you're not into someone, just tell them. No need to play games or ignore the person or anything like that.

    I know I appreciate that... it makes it easier and quicker to get over...which is why I always try to be upfront with people if I know they like me and I don't like them back.

    For me I'd rather hear "Hey... I'm not really interested in you like that" than hearing nothing at all--or worse, being told they want to be friends and without meaning it.

    Anyway, those are my thoughts!

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    Jun 10, 2008 10:22 PM GMT
    I appreciate your first post to be on this thread, MATTYB87. Now let me perv on your profile. LOL!