RSVP FUCKERS!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2011 3:58 AM GMT
    chandelierw.jpg

    Okay. So I sent out my invitations for our Christmas party. I sent out 109 emails via MailChimp. This was a very nice invite and was professionally designed. It clearly requested an RSVP, and yes I included a due date. And to cover all my bases, I sent the same invite out via Facebook events. These went to close friends, family and some very important business associates. The party is in TWO days and there are still 76 people who have not bothered to RSVP! Now you might say that maybe people just don't want to come to my stupid party, however that is not the case. The same thing happened last year, but an ass load of people showed up. So I'm guessing the same thing will happen this year. I was going to copy and paste a little description of why it's important to RSVP but my boyfriend told me not to dare send that out as it would appear rude. So I don't know whether to buy a bag of peanuts or to hire a caterer! I've also thought of putting a sign on the door saying "RSVP Guests Only", but I got shot down on that one too. Ugghhh. To be honest, I feel like I'm in a punishing mode. I want to let these fuckers know how rude this is, but apparently I'm supposed to just shut the fuck up and let people be inconsiderate. Advice please? icon_neutral.gif
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    Dec 12, 2011 4:52 AM GMT
    What kind of party is it for 109 people to attend? You have 33 so far. Do they have to bring anything?

    You could nonchalantly act surprised if anyone shows up unannounced, but that's a lot of people to keep in your head. It sounds rude of them to me.

    I don't know what an "ass load" of people is though, or what you have planned.
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    Dec 12, 2011 4:58 AM GMT
    Chaa_xwvn saidWhat kind of party is it for 109 people to attend? You have 33 so far. Do they have to bring anything?

    You could nonchalantly act surprised if anyone shows up unannounced, but that's a lot of people to keep in your head. It sounds rude of them to me.

    I don't know what an "ass load" of people is though, or what you have planned.



    It's just a Christmas party, and no one is requested to bring anything.
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    Dec 12, 2011 5:02 AM GMT
    Realize that is just human nature. Unfortunate but suggest not letting it spoil your enjoyment of the party.
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    Dec 12, 2011 4:17 PM GMT
    I know what you mean, I usually end up sending a couple of reminders before everybody has responded. Just to be safe send a final reminder.
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    Dec 12, 2011 4:20 PM GMT
    I'm glad I don't do X-mas.
  • dc415

    Posts: 255

    Dec 12, 2011 6:03 PM GMT
    it's human nature. you have to keep nagging people with reminder emails.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2011 6:07 PM GMT
    I'm still waiting for my invite. icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2011 6:09 PM GMT
    Maybe they don't know what RSVP means.
    Try writing in English next time.
  • Suetonius

    Posts: 1842

    Dec 12, 2011 6:10 PM GMT
    Scruffypup saidchandelierw.jpg Advice please? icon_neutral.gif

    Simple. This happens every year, right?
    So plan on the number of people attending being the same ratio as attendees to invites you had last year. Provide for just a a few more, in case the weather is better this year.
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    Dec 12, 2011 6:14 PM GMT
    I say keep a bb gun by the door and pop one in the skull of any non-responder as they walk in the door. Perhaps this with Pavlov them into remembering to RSVP next year.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2011 6:27 PM GMT
    i never respond if i see that an invite has a shitload of people being invited. it gives me the impression that it is just another large party so i can slide under the radar if i do or do not decide to attend. commitment free until the last minute baby.

    i usually respond when i get nagging emails tho. you should try sending those out.
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    Dec 13, 2011 12:38 AM GMT
    Move the location of the party and tell only those who RSVPd. Maybe future invites should leave out a crucial piece of information which is available only to those who reply.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 6:58 AM GMT
    bhp91126 saidMove the location of the party and tell only those who RSVPd. Maybe future invites should leave out a crucial piece of information which is available only to those who reply.



    WOW. This is the best idea I've heard!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 6:59 AM GMT
    bigeasydude saidI'm still waiting for my invite. icon_confused.gif


    Shoot me your email address and I'd love to invite you!
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Dec 13, 2011 7:01 AM GMT
    You sent out invites to a party that will be held in 2 (two) days????

    There might be some that may not even notice the invite for two days...
    I would expect you would give at least 2 "weeks" for a party, at least I would.. just sayin.....

    icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 7:05 AM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidYou sent out invites to a party that will be held in 2 (two) days????

    There might be some that may not even notice the invite for two days...
    I would expect you would give at least 2 "weeks" for a party, at least I would.. just sayin.....

    icon_wink.gif




    Noooo. At the time I created this thread, there were 2 days left. I sent out the invites a week and a half ago.
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Dec 13, 2011 7:07 AM GMT
    You keep score.

    Next time you have a party, send invitations only to those who responded this time.

    If, next year, one of the non-responders mentions not seeing an invitation or missing the party, just say "I had to limit the invitations to those who responded in the past because it was just unmanageable dealing with a lot of unexpected guests."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 7:19 AM GMT
    Man, I hate it when people do that. So inconsiderate.

    What I do sometimes is send out a final e-mail requesting everyone's/anyone's dietary requirements. Harp on the idea that you need final answers to finalize the menu and that you need to know numbers. People will see that you're serious and they might wake up and respond cos they see this is a cater-by-pax event.

    Plus, you'll be able to take of the vegetarians etc. that are coming.

    Don't know if this'll help but it's helped me to scare up the last few invitees that do actually want to attend but forgot about it. Plus it's a great disguise if you don't want to seem too obvious about stressing about the guest list.

    Good luck, and regardless of who pitches I hope you have a great time.

    Next year, invite meicon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 7:21 AM GMT
    LJay saidYou keep score.

    Next time you have a party, send invitations only to those who responded this time.

    If, next year, one of the non-responders mentions not seeing an invitation or missing the party, just say "I had to limit the invitations to those who responded in the past because it was just unmanageable dealing with a lot of unexpected guests."


    Great answer. Anyone who refuses to respond to your written invitations doesn't deserve to come to your party. Some people are thoughtless and inconsiderate - they don't care how much work, cost, and planning goes into a party - no matter if it is for a few people or 50 people.

    Here are a couple of thoughts for your consideration:

    Give them 3 weeks notice and you could say "Regrets only" on your invitations. If they still don't respond, you could drop them.

    I've done a lot of dinner and cocktail parties all these years. Weirdest thing was a dinner at my house and all the people responded but one couple. When I called them to say I hadn't heard from them, they said it was "Too Complicated" to respond and plan, etc. They said they "Like to keep it casual." So I said "Perhaps we'll see you another time then." Guess what? We're sitting there having dinner (8 people) and guess who the hell knocks at the door? That stupid couple. I said, "I thought you weren't coming!" They said they'd changed their mind. Bastards. I had no more food and desserts, and was so pissed. Friends said I should have sent them away, but I ended up letting them in - and seating them in the kitchen - finding left overs and opening up cans of food for them. Damn lazy, inconsiderate people.

    So anyway - back to your party..........what do you think? Is it right to let people in who didn't bother to answer your invitation?
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Dec 13, 2011 7:27 AM GMT
    Scruffypup said
    HndsmKansan saidYou sent out invites to a party that will be held in 2 (two) days????

    There might be some that may not even notice the invite for two days...
    I would expect you would give at least 2 "weeks" for a party, at least I would.. just sayin.....

    icon_wink.gif




    Noooo. At the time I created this thread, there were 2 days left. I sent out the invites a week and a half ago.


    Certainly reasonable then. If it were me, I'd probably put in some clause in that would really get their attention if they didn't RSVP....lol. Seriously, I think, tis the season and public practice these days, you might always have some issues.. and remember, people get so many invites to things, there are times I don't even notice what I've been invited to on Facebook since there are so many. A party would be different for me, but maybe not to others.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 7:32 AM GMT
    Jockbod48 said
    LJay saidYou keep score.

    Next time you have a party, send invitations only to those who responded this time.

    If, next year, one of the non-responders mentions not seeing an invitation or missing the party, just say "I had to limit the invitations to those who responded in the past because it was just unmanageable dealing with a lot of unexpected guests."


    Great answer. Anyone who refuses to respond to your written invitations doesn't deserve to come to your party. Some people are thoughtless and inconsiderate - they don't care how much work, cost, and planning goes into a party - no matter if it is for a few people or 50 people.

    Here are a couple of thoughts for your consideration:

    Give them 3 weeks notice and you could say "Regrets only" on your invitations. If they still don't respond, you could drop them.

    I've done a lot of dinner and cocktail parties all these years. Weirdest thing was a dinner at my house and all the people responded but one couple. When I called them to say I hadn't heard from them, they said it was "Too Complicated" to respond and plan, etc. They said they "Like to keep it casual." So I said "Perhaps we'll see you another time then." Guess what? We're sitting there having dinner (8 people) and guess who the hell knocks at the door? That stupid couple. I said, "I thought you weren't coming!" They said they'd changed their mind. Bastards. I had no more food and desserts, and was so pissed. Friends said I should have sent them away, but I ended up letting them in - and seating them in the kitchen - finding left overs and opening up cans of food for them. Damn lazy, inconsiderate people.

    So anyway - back to your party..........what do you think? Is it right to let people in who didn't bother to answer your invitation?


    LOL, would have loved to see the expression on the couples face when you ushered them into the kitchen!

    I always say I won't let them in but I always end up letting them in. It would put a damper on the party if your guests saw you turning people away.

    A safe rule of thumbs would be to have some extra food maybe, some people sometimes end up bringing a +1 (that they didn't put in the RSVP) so it will take care of that.
  • keetz

    Posts: 11

    Dec 13, 2011 7:43 AM GMT
    Sorry to hear about the poor rsvp response.

    Just put out enough chips for those who responded.

    Or call a few of them who have not responded, and ask if they are coming, and if so, can they bring something.

    I had my 50th birthday party with an rsvp, and the people who responded on the last day, I asked them to bring a dish to share.

    And no one brought a cake! we all laughed and we ran out and got pie!

    Hangout with your friends. If they complain about something missing, they are not friends you want around anyway. Screw 'em, have fun, and work with what you do have and not what is missing.

    I quit being a martyr, or a baby sitter for my friends years ago,
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2011 7:43 AM GMT
    i tried to be considerate after reading this thread so i responded yes to an invite to a christmas party this saturday. then i received second invite to another christmas party that i would refer to attend. now i am going to have a hard time backing out of the one i already said yes to. fuckin a. i shouldve stuck to my dont respond rule.
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    Dec 13, 2011 7:51 AM GMT
    Scruffypup said
    HndsmKansan saidYou sent out invites to a party that will be held in 2 (two) days????

    There might be some that may not even notice the invite for two days...
    I would expect you would give at least 2 "weeks" for a party, at least I would.. just sayin.....

    icon_wink.gif




    Noooo. At the time I created this thread, there were 2 days left. I sent out the invites a week and a half ago.


    Well, there's problem number one. you should send out invites to a party at least 3 or 4 weeks in advance, not jut a week and a half. Experience has shown that people have a hard time making a firm commitment to something on such short notice, especially during the holidays. Sending it out 3-4 weeks in advance would allow you to send 1 or 2 reminder messages for RSVPs.