How often can you try to call?

  • maximumrisk

    Posts: 799

    Jun 10, 2008 6:33 PM GMT
    Hey Guys,

    I am once again in the same Situation I always seem to end up in. I had a great party on the weekend at the house of the guy I am dating, but since I left Sunday morning I haven't heard from the guy who invited me. I had the impression that everything was just fine and that he wanted to make plans to meet again soon. I tried calling max. 3 times per day without anyone picking up.(Including Sunday, but there it was actually planned that we met again later that day) So I am getting kind of afraid of seeming to needy and on the other side it bugs me completely that I don't know what happened this time that I get ignored now. So I decided for now that I am not going to call anymore and will try it again Friday or so.

    Besides on your thoughts on what going on there, I would be mainly interested in finding out how often you can call without crossing a line. I know that more then once is mostly to much, but what is if the other one doesnt pick-up the first time?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 10, 2008 6:36 PM GMT
    My rule of thumb was phone once and leave a message.

    If there was no answering machine or call answer, then I would try a couple of times a day for a few days.

    Life is too short to waste time on a guy that may be only lukewarm in interest (or just out for a quickie).
  • maximumrisk

    Posts: 799

    Jun 10, 2008 7:09 PM GMT
    Okay, I just got a message from the guy I was talking about. Good news is that I didnĀ“t screw it up so far, bad is that I think it was pretty near to the crossingline of calling to much. I actually calmed down a lot, I was a lot worse when I was younger.

    I agree with JBE60 that calling once and leaving a message should be enough if you just try to get in contact with somebody. Only problem is when there comes nothing back.

    And how is it if you have a date that same day? I am usually the guy who is there at the exact hour and waits then a half hour till the other one shows up. What happens now very often here is that exactly at the time we were supposed to meet the calls start to get ignored. So whats allowed then?
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    Jun 10, 2008 8:06 PM GMT
    If your waiting a half hour your waiting too long. When someone is going to be late you should have already received a phone call from the person running late. I would be pissed icon_evil.gif if im calling my guy a half hour after we were suppose to meet up.
  • maximumrisk

    Posts: 799

    Jun 10, 2008 9:04 PM GMT
    gymguy1 saidIf your waiting a half hour your waiting too long. When someone is going to be late you should have already received a phone call from the person running late. I would be pissed icon_evil.gif if im calling my guy a half hour after we were suppose to meet up.


    I used to be, but I realized that thats just the way the Guatemaltecos tick.
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    Jun 10, 2008 9:24 PM GMT
    been int hat same situation. Met a guy, hung out for two days, then nothing. Then he called to see if I wanted to hang again, so we did. Got a nice kiss when we went to the car. I have text messaged him probably once a day and we even spoke on the phone about going out on a date or something similar. Then nothing. Ran into his friend this weekend and he told me the guy was there and that I should look for him I told him I was getting the cold shoulder, but the guy said he did not think that was the case by the way the guy had been talking bout me. So... I gave it a few days. I texted today..."how are you doing" and got "pretty good u?" back... then I texted that I'd still be up for hanging out sometime if interested and got nothing back again... Don't want to smother the guy, cause I have been there, but not sure if I am barking up the wrong tree or ruining a chance at just being friends.
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    Jun 10, 2008 9:24 PM GMT

    How drunk did you get at the party and what did you do?
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    Jun 10, 2008 9:28 PM GMT
    Latin Americans and South Americans have a totally different sense of time and promptness than do North Americans. HOURS late are not unheard of and are not considered rude. For business appointments, I've even experienced South Americans coming the day AFTER the appointment was scheduled!!! And, they are not apologetic about their lateness...as I said, it's not considered rude.

    I don't understand it and I'm not going to try to understand it, so I certainly can't explain it. If you're dating someone from Guatemala, you'll need to get used to it or it will make you crazy.
  • maximumrisk

    Posts: 799

    Jun 10, 2008 10:03 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    How drunk did you get at the party and what did you do?


    Havent heard from you in a time bud. I can still remember everything so I would say not that much.
    What we did? Lets just say I did enjoy it all night long. The rest is up to your imagination. icon_razz.gif

    rigsby saidLatin Americans and South Americans have a totally different sense of time and promptness than do North Americans. HOURS late are not unheard of and are not considered rude. For business appointments, I've even experienced South Americans coming the day AFTER the appointment was scheduled!!! And, they are not apologetic about their lateness...as I said, it's not considered rude.

    I don't understand it and I'm not going to try to understand it, so I certainly can't explain it. If you're dating someone from Guatemala, you'll need to get used to it or it will make you crazy.


    Its good to know that. I almost thought that I became a magnet for nutjobs. I have to get out of here.

    DJBens77 saidbeen int hat same situation. Met a guy, hung out for two days, then nothing. Then he called to see if I wanted to hang again, so we did. Got a nice kiss when we went to the car. I have text messaged him probably once a day and we even spoke on the phone about going out on a date or something similar. Then nothing. Ran into his friend this weekend and he told me the guy was there and that I should look for him I told him I was getting the cold shoulder, but the guy said he did not think that was the case by the way the guy had been talking bout me. So... I gave it a few days. I texted today..."how are you doing" and got "pretty good u?" back... then I texted that I'd still be up for hanging out sometime if interested and got nothing back again... Don't want to smother the guy, cause I have been there, but not sure if I am barking up the wrong tree or ruining a chance at just being friends.


    Whats up man?
    I dont think that you can smother anyone with messages, as long as you dont send one after another. He still answered, so next time just say that you would like to go somewhere with him. If he still wants anything with you, then he has nothing to fear of a public hangout.
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    Jun 10, 2008 10:23 PM GMT

    Oh, I see. Uuuuuuh, ouch...not sure what to say now except, I like that you aren't onboard with blowing up his cell, but if he has voice mail, you should really leave a message and tell him how lame it is not to return your calls. Don't ask me how many missed calls you should tolerate before you let him have it; I'm sure you have your own threshold.
  • maximumrisk

    Posts: 799

    Jun 10, 2008 10:32 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    Oh, I see. Uuuuuuh, ouch...not sure what to say now except, I like that you aren't onboard with blowing up his cell, but if he has voice mail, you should really leave a message and tell him how lame it is not to return your calls. Don't ask me how many missed calls you should tolerate before you let him have it; I'm sure you have your own threshold.


    You get a private description of what happened that night if you wish. *lol*

    I am normally very patient when it comes to wait for someone. I once waited 2 Hours for a guy here till he came. He was very apologizing and Afraid I would rip his head off. He had kind of the same Body as DJBens, so that was kind of funny.

    Now that I at least got a message I will wait till I can talk to him in person about that. I think that would be the best.
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    Jun 10, 2008 10:41 PM GMT

    LOL, I once waited two hours for a guy to cum too.icon_razz.gif
  • maximumrisk

    Posts: 799

    Jun 10, 2008 10:44 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    LOL, I once waited two hours for a guy to cum too.icon_razz.gif


    *lol* What a Gentleman you are that you did that. With me you wouldnt have to wait, you would just have to keep up.
  • EricPrado

    Posts: 206

    Jun 20, 2008 5:57 PM GMT
    you really shouldn't call more than once a day... otherwise you come off as needy and desperate.
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    Jun 20, 2008 6:08 PM GMT
    EricPrado saidyou really shouldn't call more than once a day... otherwise you come off as needy and desperate.


    Totally agree. If there is an answering machine or voicemail, leave a message. I would even go as far to say one call every other day.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jun 21, 2008 12:57 PM GMT
    Yup.... once and only once

    Like in volleyball ... once you serve the ball's in the other court icon_wink.gif