what makes you strong?

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    Jun 11, 2008 2:01 AM GMT
    from what do you draw your personal strength, resolve, personal confidence, positive self image, or empowerment? what's your foundation- be it an experience (positive or traumatic), a person, a belief, or 'other?' what is it in our lives that draws us or inspires us to be truly comfortable in our skin, and on every level? can anyone say this ever happens at all save for in rare cases? or is true confidence elusive and ephemeral; something we can learn how to project, but which has little substance? is true personal strength transcendently non-reliant upon confidence?

    i was just pondering the issue of confidence, for myself and for others in general, and was curious as to what makes different people tick. i'm sure that the source of strength is unique for all of us. it's probably a complicated issue not easily put into words in every instance, and i'm sure the answer evolves or changes for each of us through our lives, but i'd be curious to read what ppl have to say, as best they can.
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    Jun 11, 2008 2:07 AM GMT
    Life experiences are probably #1. From an early age I looked inwards to deal with issues. That is not necessarily a good thing at times, but it has come in handy in the last 15 or so years.

    My partner is also a source of strength. It would be more difficult to cope with life if I came home after a long day at work to an empty place. Been there done that for too many years.

    Finally I have a personality that is basically even tempered. I am not prone to bitterness, jealousy, or consumed with regrets about what could have been.

    I am sure if I thought about it more I would come up with others (e.g. music, literature).
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    Jun 11, 2008 2:36 AM GMT
    Traumatic experiences coupled with an introverted personality.
    Most of life is a choice, even when you didn't choose the event, you still have choices.

    All honor's wounds are self-inflicted.
    ~ Andrew Carnegie

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    Jun 11, 2008 2:49 AM GMT
    song chart memes
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    Jun 11, 2008 2:52 AM GMT
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    Jun 11, 2008 2:59 AM GMT
    funnyƂ graphs
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:05 AM GMT
    i'll say, personally, that i look at it on primarily two levels:

    there's the level of 'what gives me strength from day to day in dealing with stressful situations?' and to that, i'd say (not necessarily in order):

    an intentional detachment of myself from whatever i'm doing, so as not to obsess or take things too seriously. keeping things in perspective.

    the support of friends.

    the love of my family that i know i always have, no matter what (though parents don't live forever, and so this one has an expiration date).

    personal resolve/fear of failure/worrying what others think- not all positive, but they certainly motivate.

    meditation and exercise in venting stress and coping with inner turmoil.

    the knowledge that nothing lasts and change is the only constant- bad times must necessarily give way to good times. though the danger in this logic is that the opposite is of course also true lol.

    intellectualizing things so they don't hurt.

    recently, finding peace in the buddhist idea that we don't even really exist- or our egos don't in any case- and that nothing can scathe what we really are, which is sort of like a knot in emptiness, called love or consciousness.

    i may add more farther on..

    but on a deeper level, as regards my sense of self confidence and value.... well i'll come back to that one after some further discussion. that's where things get complicated, and i consider those deeper things as separate from what we use to get through bad days or even depression. those deeper things determine everything in our lives, from how we interact with others, to how we define ourselves.
  • xKorix

    Posts: 607

    Jun 11, 2008 3:06 AM GMT
    I guess for me it's that part of me that has carried me through the tough stuff that I've had to deal with, even when other parts felt like giving up...and to know this part will pull through any rough external events...o,0
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:08 AM GMT
    funny graphs
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:09 AM GMT
    xKorix saidI guess for me it's that part of me that has carried me through the tough stuff that I've had to deal with, even when other parts felt like giving up...and to know this part will pull through any rough external events...o,0


    that's kewl- but clarify... what is that part of you? where'd it come from? what's its purpose? what give it its strength?

    icon_smile.gif
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:14 AM GMT
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:17 AM GMT
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:20 AM GMT
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:24 AM GMT
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  • badtouch

    Posts: 67

    Jun 11, 2008 3:25 AM GMT
    ok, first i feel compelled to note, czarodziej. i find your posts continually compelling.

    now, on to the subject at hand.

    we are all, each of us, a microcosm of sorts. there are things both operatic and tacit, logical and paradoxical, occuring at all times.

    like the universe, matter exceeds towards entropy, but the universe stretches towards infinity in all directions. thusly, things that are will ultimately pass, but that which passes may also occur again. and in the realm of human consciousness, it is not possible to stipulate with certainty any future occurance.

    the application of will, then, the humanity, is to accept the uncertainties and determine our truest path: either acquiescing to a lack of strength (and subsequent growth) or using that will to validate the struggle; we die slow or we live fast.

    whether waxing or waning, the matter within remains at a constant. and that which we are determines that which we will be.

    so to be strong today, i must draw from yesterday. and the equilibrium balances in my favour.
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:28 AM GMT
    also, in certain instances, it helps me to know that i'm a mature individual even when others around me aren't. sometimes that may come across as an 'i'm better than you' approach, and in rare instances it is because with some people i am lol :p but in the vast majority of cases where i find solace in this knowledge, its because the knowledge of that maturity makes it something worth protecting and preserving, and naturally the effort exerted to preserve its sanctity lifts me above whatever situation threatens it.
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:29 AM GMT
    funny graphs
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:31 AM GMT
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:32 AM GMT
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:33 AM GMT
    badtouch saidok, first i feel compelled to note, czarodziej. i find your posts continually compelling.

    now, on to the subject at hand.

    we are all, each of us, a microcosm of sorts. there are things both operatic and tacit, logical and paradoxical, occuring at all times.

    like the universe, matter exceeds towards entropy, but the universe stretches towards infinity in all directions. thusly, things that are will ultimately pass, but that which passes may also occur again. and in the realm of human consciousness, it is not possible to stipulate with certainty any future occurance.

    the application of will, then, the humanity, is to accept the uncertainties and determine our truest path: either acquiescing to a lack of strength (and subsequent growth) or using that will to validate the struggle; we die slow or we live fast.

    whether waxing or waning, the matter within remains at a constant. and that which we are determines that which we will be.

    so to be strong today, i must draw from yesterday. and the equilibrium balances in my favour.


    i had to read that twice but it makes perfect sense to me icon_smile.gif i agree wholeheartedly. balance and equilibrium are integral. you should read the Tao Te King if you haven't already.

    paradox is an intrinsic aspect of reality, which by all means shouldn't exist (and doesn't, really)- and so in forging our way through life in time and space, we have to apply Will in that chaos of probability and uncertainty, and manifest our own futures. we, each of us, are the centers of our own universes, which are everywhere and nowhere, and we construct our own realities. if we draw sagaciously from what was and apply it in what is toward what will be, things tend to align themselves to our will. this faith in ourselves both IS confidence, and is a source of confidence. trust in the higher power of our highest selves.
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:39 AM GMT
    funny graphs
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:41 AM GMT
    song chart memes
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:43 AM GMT
    Oh goody,
    Caslon found a new website.
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:43 AM GMT
    funny graphs*

    *must have been drawn by a christian since the 12 days are on the wrong dates.
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    Jun 11, 2008 3:44 AM GMT
    funny graphs