Bottoming... I just felt pain and discomfort does that mean he was bad at it or am i a top??

  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 14, 2011 1:22 AM GMT
    recently bottomed with a guy,... however the whole time i didnt really get any pleasure out of it, rather it was kinda uncomfortable and painfull. im curious, do u think he was doing it wrong? or does this indicate that i am just designed to top??

    thanks fellers!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2011 1:30 AM GMT
    It means you suck.

    Oh wait, what was the question?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2011 1:40 AM GMT
    It can mean many things, including that he didnt turn you on enough, you were at the wrong angle, or you need to slut yourself up more so dick doesnt hurt. You pick.
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 14, 2011 5:17 AM GMT
    Chainers saidIt can mean many things, including that he didnt turn you on enough, you were at the wrong angle, or you need to slut yourself up more so dick doesnt hurt. You pick.


    the turning me on could have been it.... the angle could have been wrong... however slut itt up. hhaha i was having sex with him hahah
  • LuckyPierre

    Posts: 192

    Dec 14, 2011 2:15 PM GMT
    Get a dildo. Use it on yourself, you will learn what you like and it will help you learn to relax easier. I have a nice 7x5 friend named Rex I work with.

    I've topped mostly over the last couple of years, but there are times when I really want to bottom and if you practice you'll be ready to take it!
  • Slowride

    Posts: 5

    Dec 14, 2011 2:49 PM GMT
    The remedy is to slow down. It takes awhile to relax enough to enjoy the wonderful sensations of being penetrated. I love the tease and anticipation created by my lover running his cock up and down and probing me until I'm begging for it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2011 3:22 PM GMT
    I agree that it's all about communication. There are some guys that just like to "ram" it in. I never saw the pleasure in doing that as a top or bottom. Take it slow and figure out what works for you. But most importantly, tell the person you're with how you're feeling (definitely don't continue if it causes you a lot of pain as you may be causing damage on the inside). I don't use poppers anymore but did at the very beginning to help me loosen up. Now I know what works and what doesn't work. Keep us posted! icon_redface.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2011 3:40 PM GMT
    it gets better. icon_lol.gif
  • jackthejock

    Posts: 395

    Dec 14, 2011 6:22 PM GMT
    the position really matters too, different people find different ones easier. We all know it looks hot in porn when one guy bends another over and just lays into him and fucks hard...but porn isn't reality and in person that doesn't really feel that good.

    Personally, I think laying on your side like spooning is for me the most comfortable way to bottom. My man on the other hand prefers to have me lay on my back and then he likes to sit on my cock.

    And for sure use lots of lube and foreplay, finger yourself a bit first then have him finger you so you get used to the sensation of something going in and get loosened up and ready
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 14, 2011 8:16 PM GMT
    LuckyPierre saidGet a dildo. Use it on yourself, you will learn what you like and it will help you learn to relax easier. I have a nice 7x5 friend named Rex I work with.

    I've topped mostly over the last couple of years, but there are times when I really want to bottom and if you practice you'll be ready to take it!



    hmm ok thats what i was thinking.. but i would have to order one of those hahaha . : /
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 14, 2011 8:17 PM GMT
    rugbyguyfl saidI agree that it's all about communication. There are some guys that just like to "ram" it in. I never saw the pleasure in doing that as a top or bottom. Take it slow and figure out what works for you. But most importantly, tell the person you're with how you're feeling (definitely don't continue if it causes you a lot of pain as you may be causing damage on the inside). I don't use poppers anymore but did at the very beginning to help me loosen up. Now I know what works and what doesn't work. Keep us posted! icon_redface.gif



    ..... what are poppers?
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 14, 2011 8:19 PM GMT
    jackthejock saidthe position really matters too, different people find different ones easier. We all know it looks hot in porn when one guy bends another over and just lays into him and fucks hard...but porn isn't reality and in person that doesn't really feel that good.

    Personally, I think laying on your side like spooning is for me the most comfortable way to bottom. My man on the other hand prefers to have me lay on my back and then he likes to sit on my cock.

    And for sure use lots of lube and foreplay, finger yourself a bit first then have him finger you so you get used to the sensation of something going in and get loosened up and ready


    thanks thay may actually work.. ive seen it done, but didnt even think of it
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2011 11:45 PM GMT
    Poppers are a type of nitrate, similar to what is used to treat angina in a spray form. They simply are a smooth muscle relaxant which is why they loosen you up. Some people get a headache from the dilating blood vessels around the brain. But one can build up a tolerance to the headache, meaning it does not hurt as much- either in the bum or the head.
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 15, 2011 1:35 AM GMT
    holy shit.. im still confused hahaha. didnt know sex was this complicated... : /
  • LuckyPierre

    Posts: 192

    Dec 15, 2011 1:08 PM GMT
    I'd skip the poppers... doing drugs (inhalant) should not be necessary to have good sex. Just sayin...
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 16, 2011 12:47 AM GMT
    k ya. both times i bottomed, it was just the worst haahah.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 16, 2011 2:32 AM GMT
    tailgater_3 saidit gets better. icon_lol.gif

    Bahahahah. Yes.

    I think many people form their sexual preferences based on a few experiences too often. It saddens me.
    I've had some near religious experiences bottoming, and want to convert everyone, give it a chance!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 16, 2011 2:41 AM GMT
    The best way for a new (or seldom) bottom is have your top man lay down and you sit on his cock. You control the angle, thrust, depth, etc. that is best for you...its the least stressful too.

    FYI...you can just say you don't do anal sex. You won't be the only one.



  • jackthejock

    Posts: 395

    Dec 16, 2011 7:42 AM GMT
    bonifaciot8 said


    ..... what are poppers?



    Poppers are a liquid that come in a little bottle, you open it up and sniff it (DO NOT get it on your skin). It causes all the blood to rush in your head and feels kinda trippy, but what it also does is relaxes the muscles in your ass so that it doesn't hurt as much to be fucked. You can usually buy them at any sex shop for like $13-30 depending on the brand and size. I have used them a bit in the past, my boyfriend is the only guy I've used them for sex with though. I used them the first several times we did it until I got used to getting fucked by him.

    http://drugfucked.tht.org.uk/home/thelowdown/poppers/
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 19, 2011 4:38 PM GMT
    If you don't like it/it doesn't feel good, don't do it. Why do you feel like you have to try and get used to doing something you don't like?
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 21, 2011 1:09 AM GMT
    ThePenIsMyTier said
    tailgater_3 saidit gets better. icon_lol.gif

    Bahahahah. Yes.

    I think many people form their sexual preferences based on a few experiences too often. It saddens me.
    I've had some near religious experiences bottoming, and want to convert everyone, give it a chance!




    WAZZAAA??!?! really?
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 21, 2011 1:10 AM GMT
    Animus saidIf you don't like it/it doesn't feel good, don't do it. Why do you feel like you have to try and get used to doing something you don't like?



    well somtimes practice makes perfect????
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2011 8:58 AM GMT
    bottoming...i love it!!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2011 3:27 PM GMT
    bonifaciot8 said
    Animus saidIf you don't like it/it doesn't feel good, don't do it. Why do you feel like you have to try and get used to doing something you don't like?



    well somtimes practice makes perfect????


    Atta boy! Way to get back on the horse (no pun intended as I don't know your bf). lol
  • bonifaciot8

    Posts: 38

    Dec 24, 2011 12:23 AM GMT
    kyle88 saidbottoming...i love it!!!!!!


    you got any tips on how to make it more enjoyable?