Usually for me, if it's a trick or a quick hook-up, or in the steam room, I like to make my partner(s) cum, and I don't worry about myself. I'm usually jacking my own cock, and that way I can totally control when I cum. A lot of the time in the bath house, I want to do at least three to five other guys before I cum, and so for me it's all about pleasing my partner. I want HIM to come and enjoy himself, and that gets me off more than just my own orgasm. I will say though, that it's always disappointing to be with someone who can't go for more than about 2 minutes before shooting. I like to go for a good 10 to 20 minutes before making him come. Or at least 5 minutes. I can also time my orgasm to my partner's usually.
Sometimes, though, I'll be getting fucked by a guy, and he'll just keep going and going with no letup in sight, and in such a case, I'll get myself off in about 15-20 minutes whether he cums or not, but I usually try to stay after I'm done and at least give him SOME stimulation in return for getting me off. Tit for tat, I figure. Except for the meth users. They can never finish or cum, and they just waste my time.