People stare at you for no f**cking reason?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 23, 2011 4:45 AM GMT
    I hate this. I went to a bar today with 2 of my female friends. It was very crowded there. It didn't take long for something really annoying to happen. People would stare at me, and when I stare back at them, they look away. People do this to me all the fucking time and I find it insanely annoying.

    I makes me feel like I did something wrong or I have something on my face or on my clothing. I started noticing it at like 14 and i feel like it gets progressively worse as I get older. I am very self conscious about it.

    When people stare at me, I try to smile at them and diffuse the situation (unless I'm in a crappy mood in which case I just give them a "what are you looking at face"), but a lot of times they just look away.......only to start looking at me again as soon as they think I'm not looking at them.

    I hate when people stare at me like that in a social setting. Like if I get on the train to go to work and someone is staring at me, it makes me rabidly angry because I always wonder what they are thinking. It makes me feel like something is wrong with me or something about me seems out of place. Like I don't belong there or something.

    Am I overreacting to this or do people just stare at other people a lot?

    I just couldn't wait to get out of there tonight, It was like I had walked in there in naked or something......

    EDIT:

    I had heterochromia as a child, someone in the thread made the connection between that and not liking for people to look at me because I got stared at and made fun of as a kid.
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Dec 23, 2011 4:50 AM GMT
    dude, u sound like a paranoid schizophrenic, chill the fuck out. Aint nobody starin at yo monkey asssss.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 23, 2011 4:50 AM GMT
    How can somebody stare at you when you don't even have a picture?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 23, 2011 4:57 AM GMT
    Just shove your finger up your nose. They'll either laugh. Or they'll be disgusted and won't look at you again.
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Dec 23, 2011 4:59 AM GMT
    I get stared at occasionally but I also am... a little bit extra.
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    Dec 23, 2011 4:59 AM GMT
    xrichx saidJust shove your finger up your nose. They'll either laugh. Or they'll be disgusted and won't look at you again.
    If that doesn't work, flick a big slimy booger a them.
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    Dec 23, 2011 5:10 AM GMT
    Shinra_Tensei saidThats terrible that you feel like that dek......but it sounds like you are being really self conscious for no reason. To assume people think you don't belong in a place just because they are looking at you is not good. Where does that mindset come from, it's prob not in your best interest.

    Have you ever thought that maybe it's just an automatic reaction to being stared at and teased from having heterochromia when you were young? Even when a situation is over you can still have trauma from it and little things can put you back in that space without you even knowing it.



    Damn. I never once considered that. It's just something I block out, and I have never really told any of my friends about it. I guess it affected me more deeply than I care to admit to myself.

    I def learned something today. icon_eek.gif
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    Dec 23, 2011 5:11 AM GMT
    Import saiddude, u sound like a paranoid schizophrenic, chill the fuck out. Aint nobody starin at yo monkey asssss.

    Shouldn't your head be in a blender?
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    Dec 23, 2011 5:14 AM GMT
    dekiruman saidAm I overreacting to this or do people just stare at other people a lot?

    I often feel people are staring at me in a bar. Until I realize they're actually looking PAST me to watch a TV screen, or at someone else they know, with me in the line of sight.

    Do you dress in an eccentric manner for the places you are? Think you have a particularly "gay face" or mannerisms? Do you go to gay bars and get stares there, too, or only in straight places?
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    Dec 23, 2011 5:14 AM GMT
    Um....usually when I stare at a guy, it's because I like him icon_redface.gif


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    Dec 23, 2011 5:47 AM GMT
    Shinra_Tensei said

    It is probably like fat kid mentality, except a lot worse because if society at least kind of frowns on staring down fat people.


    icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

    I love you shin.

    What shinra is trying to say JTO is that i was tortured by my peers a lot for being different, and I got stared at from kids and adults alike. When I think about it, I felt very ugly as a kid, like a circus freak (and some of the other kids treated me as such.) So shinra's theory is that I automatically associate someone staring at me with being rejected or made fun of because of how I look.

    Having heterochromia as an adult is probably not as big a deal, but as a kid it was (at least for me) something that made me feel really bad about myself because anytime someone was looking at me, I felt like they were looking at my eyes. People are pretty ignorant, more so than you might think.

    In second grade I had this Asian friend who was a mini fob and didn't really speak english but we were really cool. I was the only one who played with him while he was learning english and he was the only one who played with me Then one day his mom saw me and forbid him from playing with me because of some superstition. Maybe thought I was a demon or something? icon_rolleyes.gif

    I HATE when people look at me so I am guessing there is a lot of truth in what he's saying.
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    Dec 23, 2011 5:48 AM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidYou are under surveillance and you busted them icon_biggrin.gif
    Sorry ... just feeding your parinoia ... really lay off the "fill in the blank, coke, crack, meth, speed, caffine, pot"
    Okay you are not on drugs ... then smile at them and give them a nod of the head, like you know what they are thinking. Don't give them the teethy smile that says 'what the fuck you looking at?'

    If worse comes to worse and it is just making you too parinoid, pretend like you are a movie star that is trying to be incognito and wear sunglasses and a cap and try to blend in. If you had a pic on here, we could probably give you a good idea of why someone might be staring.

    Is it men or women that you find that are staring at you?


    umm i guess women usually.
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    Dec 23, 2011 6:02 AM GMT
    Shinra_Tensei said


    THAT'S HORRIBLE! YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT. THEY SHOULD HANG HER OFF A CLIFF BY HER ANKLES AND LIGHT HER ON FIRE.


    You're so romantic icon_redface.gif

    in a scary way.....
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    Dec 23, 2011 6:33 AM GMT
    If so, where are my men? icon_lol.gif
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    Dec 23, 2011 9:44 AM GMT
    dekiruman saidI hate this. I went to a bar today with 2 of my female friends. It was very crowded there. It didn't take long for something really annoying to happen. People would stare at me, and when I stare back at them, they look away. People do this to me all the fucking time and I find it insanely annoying.

    I makes me feel like I did something wrong or I have something on my face or on my clothing. I started noticing it at like 14 and i feel like it gets progressively worse as I get older. I am very self conscious about it.

    When people stare at me, I try to smile at them and diffuse the situation (unless I'm in a crappy mood in which case I just give them a "what are you looking at face"), but a lot of times they just look away.......only to start looking at me again as soon as they think I'm not looking at them.

    I hate when people stare at me like that in a social setting. Like if I get on the train to go to work and someone is staring at me, it makes me rabidly angry because I always wonder what they are thinking. It makes me feel like something is wrong with me or something about me seems out of place. Like I don't belong there or something.

    Am I overreacting to this or do people just stare at other people a lot?

    I just couldn't wait to get out of there tonight, It was like I had walked in there in naked or something......


    This happens all the time when I go back to Asia because I look "different". After living in one particulary Asian country (my own, unfortunately) I started telling these monkeys off in their monkey-language, "What are you looking at? Why don't you just take a picture???" That would usually get them to stop staring. Don't have much of a problem in the U.S., however, unless I'm in a redneck part of the country.
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    Dec 23, 2011 11:06 AM GMT
    Import saiddude, u sound like a paranoid schizophrenic, chill the fuck out. Aint nobody starin at yo monkey asssss.


    Fucking twat. Shouldnt you burn in hell by now?
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    Dec 23, 2011 11:08 AM GMT
    tumblr_lvsprqTM5S1qarotao1_500.png
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Dec 23, 2011 11:32 AM GMT
    [quote][cite]Art_Deco said...I often feel people are staring at me in a bar. Until I realize they're actually looking PAST me to watch a TV screen, or at someone else they know, with me in the line of sight...[/quote]


    my experiences also
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    Dec 23, 2011 11:52 AM GMT
    I like it when people stare at me when they do. I like the attention. icon_smile.gif
    Just how I like the attention I get from my profile. icon_wink.gif
    It seems like it's a good thing, whatever it is. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 23, 2011 1:12 PM GMT
    As my brother says...

    "Haters gonna Hate"
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    Dec 23, 2011 1:15 PM GMT
    You don't have a picture up here, but in case you're attractive that'd be your answer.
    Or maybe you have just something very rare...like eyes with two colors or something like that.
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    Dec 23, 2011 1:43 PM GMT
    The fact that you notice this and let it bother you means that you are spending too much time worrying about what others are doing. That could explain a few things like maybe why you are single.

    Go out and do your thing and forget about those who aren't in your circle. People stare, they sneer, the gawk and whatever else and they is nothing you can do about it. Life goes on. Maybe one day you'll get lucky and a stare from some dude might turn into a conversation and later a fun activity might follow.
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    Dec 23, 2011 1:57 PM GMT
    The art of cruising is so lost on most younger gays who can't seem to pull their faces out of their iPhones or BlackBerries.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7Ampu8jxP8
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    Dec 23, 2011 2:13 PM GMT
    Take it as a compliment. It probably means they find you attractive. They look away because they're too shy to maintain eye contact, then look again when you turn your eyes away. Don't be offended -- enjoy the fact they find you good looking.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Dec 23, 2011 2:26 PM GMT
    I would calm down and realize it is just normal behavior. I'm aware when I'm being stared at.... I just go on about my business.