committed mono-relationship

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 27, 2011 5:37 PM GMT
    can we guys really be in a committed mono-relationship? i mean guys tend to be sexual driven and very visual--can the argument be made that's why there are women and gay relationship don't work? women for the most part are nurturing and want to settle down whereas we guys want to play the field.
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    Dec 27, 2011 5:53 PM GMT
    The younger the guy, the more he will play the field. The older the guy, the more he will settle down in a monogamous relationship. This is a matter of our male hormones, and simple maturity, regardless of our sexual orientation. Most men are remarkably alike, regardless of whether we're straight or gay.

    And likewise, men of all types can suffer from a mid-life crisis, and will jump the tracks as they begin to enter middle age. Again, men are men.

    So to answer your question -- yes, we guys can be in a committed relationship. I've seen it begin right out out high school, and last until their deaths. And that's partnered with both women and with men, as orientation dictates.

    And don't overrate the fidelity of females. Some studies have shown a lot of straying on the distaff side, too, though it often doesn't get a lot of notice.

    I think the constant is that when you're with someone you truly love, a man or woman, who meets all your emotional needs, you simply have no interest in looking elsewhere. I know countless gay relationships that "work" and I like to think that I'm in one myself. I hope you find one, too, if that's what you want.
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    Dec 27, 2011 6:55 PM GMT
    Art_Deco saidThe younger the guy, the more he will play the field. The older the guy, the more he will settle down in a monogamous relationship. This is a matter of our male hormones, and simple maturity, regardless of our sexual orientation. Most men are remarkably alike, regardless of whether we're straight or gay.

    And likewise, men of all types can suffer from a mid-life crisis, and will jump the tracks as they begin to enter middle age.
    Again, men are men.

    So to answer your question -- yes, we guys can be in a committed relationship. I've seen it begin right out out high school, and last until their deaths. And that's partnered with both women and with men, as orientation dictates.

    And don't overrate the fidelity of females. Some studies have shown a lot of straying on the distaff side, too, though it often doesn't get a lot of notice.

    I think the constant is that when you're with someone you truly love, a man or woman, who meets all your emotional needs, you simply have no interest in looking elsewhere. I know countless gay relationships that "work" and I like to think that I'm in one myself. I hope you find one, too, if that's what you want.


    This.
    Only Respect to you Art_Deco
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:08 PM GMT
    Not every gay guy wants the next greatest conquest... trust me... I'm a guy that wants my partner to be my best friend. I want to travel, see the world, workout together, make a home... build a white picket fence, have an SUV, a couple of pups and maybe a few pups of our own. I want to settle down and hence why I am usually single most of the time. I wont give in to what can sometimes dominate gay life. I think you need to see more than the club scene. Most of my relatioships have been long-term and I want them to stay that way.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:10 PM GMT
    Ive known a lot of girls in my time who have strayed.....

    Monogamous guys like me do exist. It has a lot to do with one's own moral values and principles.

    What is important to one guy may not be important to the next guy, so if you loyalty is very important to you, then find a guy who fits your mold.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:18 PM GMT
    gaythlete saidIve known a lot of girls in my time who have strayed.....

    Monogamous guys like me do exist. It has a lot to do with one's own moral values and principles.

    What is important to one guy may not be important to the next guy, so if you loyalty is very important to you, then find a guy who fits your mold.

    Exactly.

    I am in a committed monogamous relationship and very happy. I did my time playing the field, but I realized over time that it was empty and baseless. My man is my best friend, my partner in crime and my match in every sense.

    There are relationship-oriented guys out there, young and old, straight and gay.

    This isn't a "gay" issue, it's a human issue.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:22 PM GMT
    I don´t know why guys shouldn´t be able to. I´m in a very good relationship and I don´t see any reason why I should cheat. It depends on your mindset I guess... My bf doesn´t like to go to gay clubs / parties so I´m usually going there with other friends.... And I get hit on quite often but it´s up to you to politely decline those advances. If I´m in a monogamous relationship, in my opinion, it´s the least you can do

    I don´t see the reason the jeopardize the relationship for a quick fuck
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:46 PM GMT

    You're welcome to check out our profile, Waterpolo. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:49 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    You're welcome to check out our profile, Waterpolo. icon_wink.gif

    ^^^
    Proof that gay love isn't dead. I just wish that my generation would learn a thing or two.
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    Dec 27, 2011 7:52 PM GMT
    TrevorMark said
    meninlove said
    You're welcome to check out our profile, Waterpolo. icon_wink.gif

    ^^^
    Proof that gay love isn't dead. I just wish that my generation would learn a thing or two.

    Patience, my handsome and wonderful young Jedi, we didn't meet each other til we were in our 30s and had a few past heartaches under our belts. icon_wink.gif
  • flahotstuff

    Posts: 154

    Dec 27, 2011 8:26 PM GMT
    I think it depends on the length of the relationship- I know of few gay monogomous relationships that are older than 5 years- maybe they say they are monogomous
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Dec 27, 2011 8:44 PM GMT
    Art_Deco saidThe younger the guy, the more he will play the field. The older the guy, the more he will settle down in a monogamous relationship. This is a matter of our male hormones, and simple maturity, regardless of our sexual orientation. Most men are remarkably alike, regardless of whether we're straight or gay.

    And likewise, men of all types can suffer from a mid-life crisis, and will jump the tracks as they begin to enter middle age. Again, men are men.

    So to answer your question -- yes, we guys can be in a committed relationship. I've seen it begin right out out high school, and last until their deaths. And that's partnered with both women and with men, as orientation dictates.

    And don't overrate the fidelity of females. Some studies have shown a lot of straying on the distaff side, too, though it often doesn't get a lot of notice.

    I think the constant is that when you're with someone you truly love, a man or woman, who meets all your emotional needs, you simply have no interest in looking elsewhere. I know countless gay relationships that "work" and I like to think that I'm in one myself. I hope you find one, too, if that's what you want.
    What Art_Deco just stated. Dude, just because you do not see it does not mean it does not happen. I know quite a few gay couples and straight couples that are still together. Hell my one of my buddies was introduced to his wife in college. They have been together every since
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 27, 2011 8:53 PM GMT
    it comes down to finding someone who fits your lifestyle... someone who is a good fit into your life, and adds to your life, not negatively affects it.

    it can happen. i never thought it would for me, but so far so good icon_smile.gif

    and trust, if it can happen to me of all people, it can definitely happen to you!!!
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    Dec 27, 2011 9:06 PM GMT
    Yes. It happens all around you.. sort of like christmas. Even if you don't participate, it still exists (unless you live under a rock).
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    Dec 28, 2011 12:23 AM GMT
    thank you everyone, your thoughts really help me look at gay relationships in a different light. i am new to all this--never dated and that also means never done it...i know--

    i guess i need to be around the right type of guys, most of the ones i see are more into looks and hook ups. i see most of the profile pics on here and it's about looking good--don't get me wrong, nothing wrong with attractive guys, but when someone new to all this sees the "looks" side of gay life--leads me to think--it's about the sex and physical appearance.

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    Dec 28, 2011 12:26 AM GMT
    Like the old wise proverb says: "Women are for procreation and men are for recreation."

    So I say, let there be more recreation. The world is overpopulated anyway. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2011 7:09 AM GMT
    meninlove said
    You're welcome to check out our profile, Waterpolo. icon_wink.gif


    Yes, you should. They are an inspiration. Always respect and <3 to meninloveicon_smile.gif

    Doug & Bill, you guys are amazingicon_smile.gif

    Venky