why am I so damn shy???

  • jock4u

    Posts: 8

    Dec 27, 2011 8:46 PM GMT
    I can never meet any new guys hang ,chill etc etc because of my shyness , I miss out on allot of dudes it's a pain for me I can talk better in email and on line through chat then meet them in person, I always feel a dude will not dig me or when we meet will not like me ....... this has always been a prob for me for year . has anyone else had this happen to them and how would you over come this .
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    Dec 27, 2011 8:55 PM GMT
    jock4u saidI can never meet any new guys hang ,chill etc etc because of my shyness , I miss out on allot of dudes it's a pain for me I can talk better in email and on line through chat then meet them in person, I always feel a dude will not dig me or when we meet will not like me ....... this has always been a prob for me for year . has anyone else had this happen to them and how would you over come this .


    just gotta put yourself out there bro... let me ask you this... Are you sold on yourself? Do you know what you have to offer someone? Tell me... sell yourself to me. Get the picture? There is a saying in retail, "If you are sold on the brand, you can sell the brand." And there is truth to that in dating too... to over come your shyness... get sold on yourself... get that selfesteem going. You are a good looking guy and I'm sure quite the catch. Learn to sell thoes qualities to a complete stranger after you get sold on the idea that you are worth more and worth someone's time, energy, and investment. good luck brother!
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    Dec 27, 2011 8:59 PM GMT
    I dunno why some of the best looking people are the ones with the lowest confidence...
    It truly baffles me. icon_confused.gif
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    Dec 27, 2011 9:08 PM GMT
    ry77no saidI dunno why some of the best looking people are the ones with the lowest confidence...
    It truly baffles me. icon_confused.gif


    I think thoes people are the most beautiful. Just wish they'd see it. In time he will but will always have a kind heart.
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    Dec 27, 2011 9:20 PM GMT
    A wise person told me I was afraid of rejection... A year ago that was me... A closeted, upset, lonely person, with no confidence... A year later I am a different guy... I had a boyfriend, I am making friends, I am proud of the way I look... It all happened because of this place... Rj... You are on the right track... You already see what's wrong... Now you need to really push yourself and talk to people on here... Go outside your comfort zone. The worst someone can say is "No" "not interested" or they don't answer.... Don't take anything personally! Just move on and keep trying and you are bound to meet someone! Try not let rejection scare you... You are your worst enemy and critic... Know your good enough and other people will as well!

    Hope this helps OP

    Good luck in your adventures icon_smile.gif
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    Dec 27, 2011 10:08 PM GMT
    It's all in your head!

    It's very tempting to worry about what other people think. Unfortunately, people are going to think what they want, regardless, and there's nothing you can do about it.

    You're not a mind reader - you can't fault them for what YOU think they're thinking.

    Relax, and don't project so much - often what you build up in your head is completely different than what actually happens.

    Approach, keep it cordial, and let the chips fall where they may.

    I should learn to take my own advice.
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    Dec 27, 2011 10:51 PM GMT
    Im way shy too. I think I we need to build up our confidence more, but I think it takes a while.
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    Dec 27, 2011 11:20 PM GMT
    405655-L.jpg

    http://www.amazon.com/How-Start-Conversation-Make-Friends/dp/0684868016
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    Dec 28, 2011 12:39 AM GMT
    jock4u saidI can never meet any new guys hang ,chill etc etc because of my shyness , I miss out on allot of dudes it's a pain for me I can talk better in email and on line through chat then meet them in person, I always feel a dude will not dig me or when we meet will not like me ....... this has always been a prob for me for year . has anyone else had this happen to them and how would you over come this .


    just take off your shirt at a bar and you'll be fine

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    Dec 28, 2011 12:50 AM GMT
    Learn to smile and tell jokes.
  • DesireIron

    Posts: 426

    Dec 28, 2011 12:50 AM GMT

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    It's a fucking joke.
  • DesireIron

    Posts: 426

    Dec 28, 2011 12:53 AM GMT
    A woman was sitting in an airplane waiting for her flight to start. As she waited, a man sat down next to her. She asked him his name. He replied Bob.

    About fifteen minutes into the flight Bob sneezed. After sneezing he took out his penis and wiped it off with a tissue. The woman was disgusted, but out of shyness didn't say anything. Thirty minutes later he sneezed again. Again he took out his penis and wiped it off. The woman was again disgusted. But yet again, out of shyness, didn't say anything, but resolved to say something if he did it again. Sure enough about forty-five minutes later he sneezed again. He proceeded to remove his penis from his pants and wipe it off.

    By now, the woman was sick of seeing this and asked him why he did it.

    The man replied "I have a medical condition. Every time I sneeze I have an orgasm."

    The woman, shocked, said "Oh, what do you take for that?"

    The man replied "Pepper."
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    Dec 28, 2011 12:54 AM GMT
    ry77no saidI dunno why some of the best looking people are the ones with the lowest confidence...
    It truly baffles me. icon_confused.gif
    ...or the worst looking people steal the best looking pictures to use for their profiles.
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Dec 28, 2011 12:56 AM GMT
    Story of my life. I'm don't have self-esteem issue. I have fear issues. Unless a guy had GAY printed on his shirt, or forehead, I'm afraid of getting beaten up. If he does have GAY as above, I'm convinced I'm not good enough for him.It's a bitch.
  • DesireIron

    Posts: 426

    Dec 28, 2011 1:10 AM GMT
    jock4u saidI can never meet any new guys hang ,chill etc etc because of my shyness , I miss out on allot of dudes it's a pain for me I can talk better in email and on line through chat then meet them in person, I always feel a dude will not dig me or when we meet will not like me ....... this has always been a prob for me for year . has anyone else had this happen to them and how would you over come this .

    So let's see, you feel it is better miss out on a lot, rather than take the chance that he might like you? You take the sure bet at losing, rather than take the bet that might let you win? Dude, everybody....EVERYBODY....feels the way you do. We all fear rejection. But you gotta just roll with it. It's no big deal. Who died and left those others guys the arbiters of all people? Why is their opinion so correct?
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    Dec 28, 2011 1:28 AM GMT
    Trollileo saidBecause you're a pussy like me. Go find someone and run your abs in his face. That'll make you less shy.
    You're assuming that picture is actually him. icon_wink.gif
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    Dec 28, 2011 1:32 AM GMT
    Trollileo said
    paulflexes said
    Trollileo saidBecause you're a pussy like me. Go find someone and run your abs in his face. That'll make you less shy.
    You're assuming that picture is actually him. icon_wink.gif
    No. This is for other people who are insecure and are attractive.
    Oh ok. I'll agree with ya on that.

    Now if only I can talk some shy guy into rubbing his abs in my face.

    #FirstWorldProblems
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    Dec 28, 2011 1:40 AM GMT
    Trollileo said
    paulflexes said
    Trollileo said
    paulflexes said
    Trollileo saidBecause you're a pussy like me. Go find someone and run your abs in his face. That'll make you less shy.
    You're assuming that picture is actually him. icon_wink.gif
    No. This is for other people who are insecure and are attractive.
    Oh ok. I'll agree with ya on that.

    Now if only I can talk some shy guy into rubbing his abs in my face.

    #FirstWorldProblems
    I would suggest Greenhopper, but he is reserved, not shy.

    I'll tell you what. When I get my six pack, you'll be the first one that gets abs in his face. That's it, though.
    Actually, I've already groped GreenHopper's abs. In real life. icon_lol.gif
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    Dec 28, 2011 1:46 AM GMT
    The only way to get over being shy and not knowing what to say around strangers is practice. Force yourself, or get someone to force you, into situations where you speak with new people. Start off with small groups (maybe you, a friend and a few of their friends you've never met) then move from there.

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    Dec 28, 2011 4:15 AM GMT
    Very true. You will miss so many good opportunities if you are shy which i have done so many times in my life. But just learn what your good at coz then you will not feel shy when your around with your best feature on. This feature can be anything- it could be your physical appearance, personality trait.

    Try to be more expressive that you can be and practice this. Talk to your inner mind always.

    This worked for me. I wish you good luck mate.

    Venky
  • jock4u

    Posts: 8

    Dec 28, 2011 1:01 PM GMT
    Thanks everyone for the advice...greatly appreciated