Please measure your butt

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 24, 2007 10:56 PM GMT
    You know...your hips. I did. I'm concerned. What do you measure?

    Is there an ideal waist-to-butt ratio? My clothes want to know.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 24, 2007 11:31 PM GMT
    There is and I have it. Unfortunately, there's not a single trousers mfr. that can meet the standard. You'd think at least one might have gone to a fashion design school.

    Hint for you future fashion designers - they're called BALLS. Please make your designs to accomodate and accentuate them. Or DIE!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 24, 2007 11:34 PM GMT
    I measured my butt but I'm not disclosing anything. You did mean the anus diameter, right? Ok, then, you go first.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 2:15 AM GMT
    I know the diameter of my penis. I know the limits of your sphincter. Therefore I know with fair approximation, the diameter of your anus.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 3:43 AM GMT
    i know mine is off the charts
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 4:04 AM GMT
    I want numbers.
  • zakariahzol

    Posts: 2241

    Jul 25, 2007 5:05 AM GMT
    Yes! Finally the topic I am waiting for. TQ OW.
    Common guys, let hear it..
  • NewDrew

    Posts: 24

    Jul 25, 2007 5:23 AM GMT
    37
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 5:55 AM GMT
    Hmm... sadly, I have no butt.

    But I have this fantasy of an ass that I can park my beer on, while I'm boinking it.

    Oooh. I didn't say that out loud, did I?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 6:22 AM GMT
    What OW, a boring night in front of the mirror?

    Mindgarden: I've seen more than one woman of color who could supply that ass of your fantasy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 7:37 AM GMT
    I've got some junk in the trunk, but sadly nothing to measure it with. As soon as I can find a measuring tape I'll post some stats.

    Also, any other boys find that the size of their booty keeps them from wearing some types of pants? I cant wear slim cut or straight leg pants for the life of me. But when I wear boot cut jeans, they do some great things for my ass.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 8:06 AM GMT
    There is this really cute straight guy at my work and he has the hottest ass in jeans that I have ever seen. Ive never found myself to stare at anyones ass (guy or girl) but I mean this guy is the whole package and the ass just takes the cake. What brand are thoes jeans? I have no idea and I'm scared to ask him lol.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 12:53 PM GMT
    "What OW, a boring night in front of the mirror?"

    LOL...More like a boring night of trying on half the jeans in my wardrobe and finally grabbing the tape measure.
  • art_smass

    Posts: 960

    Jul 25, 2007 4:41 PM GMT
    I got very excited last fall when Michael Kors based his collection on the dancer's body and legitimized the existence of pleats in menswear again. I've got the ass and thighs of a hockey player, and flat front pants make me look gigantic. The low waists are terrible, too. I haven't measured my ass, but I'm the sure the ratio between my small waist and my big butt is huge. Most guys are built like sausages, so they can get away with wearing pants that are shaped like sausage casings. I can't.

    I know it's disheartening to put on pants that don't fit, but you need to know that it's not your fault. The trends for the last decade or more have favored a guy with no body. That cycle seems to be ending, and a more athletic silhouette is becoming fashionable.

    Perhaps there are some pants that fit in your future. Or maybe you can just stop wearing pants altogether. If you choose the latter option, please send photos.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 5:07 PM GMT
    Cool! It's the designers' fault that what fit me three months ago now doesn't. I don't think I want to wear pleated jeans.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 5:08 PM GMT
    Good call there my friend - in fact, forego trousers altogether. ;) WOO HOO!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 5:11 PM GMT
    Boycott pants~!
  • art_smass

    Posts: 960

    Jul 25, 2007 5:36 PM GMT
    Well, no one in their right mind would want to wear pleated jeans. Your best option is to stop wearing jeans if they fit you that poorly, or to move onto another style. For instance, Levi's 501s might be a classic, but the other styles they produce have different waist-to-hip ratios. I buy some kind that has roomier legs because it's the tight thighs that bug me the most. The waist is a little higher than most jeans on the market today, but so is my waist. It's at the top of my pelvis, like it should be on a guy with an ass.

    Then again, perhaps your problem is not with the pants, but with your ass. What have you been eating lately?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 5:39 PM GMT
    Well.....DUH!!!

    BIATCH
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 6:08 PM GMT
    Obscenewish, you may want to consider a pair of these:
    20051115_205_350x263.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 6:27 PM GMT
    Biatch Numero 2
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 6:30 PM GMT
    You probably got a beautiful ass. So, what exactly is the problem? Is it too small or too big? Is it too flat or too round? Is it itching, burning, red, unhygenic?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 6:34 PM GMT
    Yup, stop wearing pants! I got two Utilikits when I was in Seattle, and these things are comfortable!

    I went to a beach wedding this past weekend in one, and I got a few looks, but the next day the groom called me up because all the guys in the wedding party though it was cool and wanted to know where they can get one.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2007 6:35 PM GMT
    "is it itching, burning, red, unhygienic" And my mental image is of a dog scooting its butt across the grass to relieve an itch -- you haven't perchance been doing that have you OW?
  • trebor965

    Posts: 200

    Jul 25, 2007 7:01 PM GMT
    Are we measuring depth?