double_A saidsince ive never had that new years kiss i see all the time on tv and around other people, id like to ask: is the tradition that important?
this new years eve, i finally have a relationship and an opportunity for that symbolic kiss, but it looks like we might be going to a party where we cant be very open.. im a little bummed by that. am i overreacting? i guess ive just been looking forward to participating in that new years kiss... maybe its really worthless?
Not to be overly sentimental, but in truth, EVERY kiss is worth something, and some more than others. Wasting a chance to kiss is - to my 52 year old mind and heart - a foolish, foolish waste.
Kissing in the New Year comes from German and Welsh traditions, based in a belief that the first person you encounter in the New Year, and "how" you interact with them (e.g. a business meeting, a fight, a financial transaction, etc) is a sign of what's to come the rest of the year. So if the first person you encounter is the person you love most, then it is wise to kiss them, and keep the harmony and romance alive for the coming year.
In truth, while this exceedingly romantic notion is steeped in superstition, there's something to be learned about what's at stake here for you, OP, and that is how you want your relationship perceived and how you wish to 'claim' or 'declare' your love - with secrecy and un-fulfilled longing, or with pride and passion and tenderness.
It isn't easy to be half-in/half-out and there are, doubtless, many reasons you have for not being able to be 'very open'. But in fact, what kind of fun are you really having and at whose expense? I'm guaranteeing no straight identified couple is asking this question of anyone.
I say kiss him, kiss in 2012 and kiss goodbye to fear, the closet, lack of self-respect and being sublimated in an environment where everybody else EXCEPT you is free to express your affection and love for someone.
Kiss in hope, pride, love, and a little fearless abandon. You might be surprised at what fortune follows - not by chance, but by choice.
Happy New Year, and good luck.