Scruff and Grindr Observation

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 3:43 PM GMT
    So, everyone uses Grindr and Scruff. I am on it, but I only occassionally sign on to the app through my phone.

    the interesting thing for me are the increasing number of posts like this:

    woof - Jan 1
    you are hot - Jan 1
    I wanna fuck - jan 2
    why wont you ans - jan 2
    you are an asshole - jan 2
    fuck you who do you think you are - Jan 3
    you are an arrogant prick - jan 3


    Guys... there is no obligation to answer ANYONE on these apps. And if I dont go there often, how can I respond quickly.

    This is no big deal, but it is incredibly creepy and disturbing. Anyone else have this happen to them? I have had it happen several times in the past few days. I suspect that the reason is that guys got new phones for Christmas and are playing with them so there is increased traffic. But it is still unnerving to be called names because I didn't respond.

    .... (cue "Twilight Zone" music)... icon_eek.gif
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    Jan 03, 2012 4:31 PM GMT
    GayLibrarian saidWhy didnt you "ans"? What did he look like?


    I didn't ans because i never saw it. He posted all of it before I could even see the first one...

    and he was seriously one of about 5 guys who did that! I rarely go on that site so I just didn't see it.

    It was spooky.
  • DesireIron

    Posts: 426

    Jan 03, 2012 4:50 PM GMT
    The apps show when you were last online. So he should have been able to tell that you hadn't seen his messages.

    Why don't you just be glad you dodged this nutcase instead of fretting online able it?
  • OJ89

    Posts: 106

    Jan 03, 2012 4:52 PM GMT
    I recently had something similar but with this added.

    I'm in theatre too
    Why won't you answer?
    You'll never get anywhere in this industry


    I'll never make it in theatre because I didn't reply to a torso on Scruff. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 4:59 PM GMT
    You're hot. People feel spurned through no fault of your own. Sour grapes ensue.
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    Jan 03, 2012 5:28 PM GMT
    DesireIron saidThe apps show when you were last online. So he should have been able to tell that you hadn't seen his messages.

    Why don't you just be glad you dodged this nutcase instead of fretting online able it?


    You dont think it is sort of disconcerting to have someone reacting so viserally to something so minor? You might think differently if it was directed towards you.

    Nothing is "private" anymore.
  • DesireIron

    Posts: 426

    Jan 03, 2012 5:50 PM GMT
    Alpha_Muscle said
    DesireIron saidThe apps show when you were last online. So he should have been able to tell that you hadn't seen his messages.

    Why don't you just be glad you dodged this nutcase instead of fretting online able it?


    You dont think it is sort of disconcerting to have someone reacting so viserally to something so minor? You might think differently if it was directed towards you.

    Nothing is "private" anymore.

    I would've just blocked him.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jan 03, 2012 6:07 PM GMT
    Geez .....

    I've gotten responses like that on HERE. icon_rolleyes.gif

    It's like an ego thing I think .... LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME
    Sorry I got better things to do ....
    Hey if I send a note to someone and they don't answer ?
    Fine.....
    Maybe they are busy
    Maybe they found someone
    maybe they find me the most repulsive thing on earth
    But WTF Dude ...... Calm down
    It's the freakin Internet icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 6:22 PM GMT
    GQjock saidGeez .....

    I've gotten responses like that on HERE. icon_rolleyes.gif

    It's like an ego thing I think .... LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME
    Sorry I got better things to do ....
    Hey if I send a note to someone and they don't answer ?
    Fine.....
    Maybe they are busy
    Maybe they found someone
    maybe they find me the most repulsive thing on earth
    But WTF Dude ...... Calm down
    It's the freakin Internet icon_smile.gif


    If I contact someone and they dont respond, I just move on.

    What if you dad is in the hospital? What if you electricity was shut off? What if you dont go to the website anymore? What if you dont answer emails anymore?

    There are million reasons someone doesn't answer you. And there are a million reasons I dont answer someone. I try to, I dont want to be a dick, but jeez.... I have no DUTY to anyone!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 8:53 PM GMT
    I've had messages from a few folk on gaydar here in the UK who, while not getting rude, don't seem to know how to take a hint that the reason I'm not very forthcoming with my chat is down to my lack of interest.

    I don't have Grindr or any variation thereof - I would say because I dislike 'that sort of thing', but it's actually just because I'm a phone luddite and have yet to get myself an Android phone or an iPhone. Props to me for choosing Symbian in 2009...

    Anyway, I know I don't have my face on display here, but I also wouldn't on Grindr I think - mostly because i appreciate being in come control of my privacy, although I 'wish' I felt I could put my face up. I guess I've just heard too many horror stories about bitchiness and backbiting once drama begins. Not that I would set out to begin any - it's just better to be safe than sorry I guess. It's made me sorta reticent about giving 'that much' info - especially in a small city like Edinburgh where I live (see, I let you know *that* much...but not *too* much! Cunning, no?).

    Sorry for hijacking the thread there.

    Carry on lads.
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    Jan 03, 2012 10:28 PM GMT
    harrygym saidI've had messages from a few folk on gaydar here in the UK who, while not getting rude, don't seem to know how to take a hint that the reason I'm not very forthcoming with my chat is down to my lack of interest.

    I don't have Grindr or any variation thereof - I would say because I dislike 'that sort of thing', but it's actually just because I'm a phone luddite and have yet to get myself an Android phone or an iPhone. Props to me for choosing Symbian in 2009...

    Anyway, I know I don't have my face on display here, but I also wouldn't on Grindr I think - mostly because i appreciate being in come control of my privacy, although I 'wish' I felt I could put my face up. I guess I've just heard too many horror stories about bitchiness and backbiting once drama begins. Not that I would set out to begin any - it's just better to be safe than sorry I guess. It's made me sorta reticent about giving 'that much' info - especially in a small city like Edinburgh where I live (see, I let you know *that* much...but not *too* much! Cunning, no?).

    Sorry for hijacking the thread there.

    Carry on lads.


    Its okay... no problem.. Hijack away!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 10:29 PM GMT
    I put an ugly pic of me up on Grindr to keep from people hitting on me. I'm really just using it to find a place to live anyway. Gotta move out Feb-March.
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    Jan 03, 2012 10:30 PM GMT
    JakeBenson saidI put an ugly pic of me up on Grindr to keep from people hitting on me. I'm really just using it to find a place to live anyway. Gotta move out Feb-March.


    Using Grindr to find a place to live? Seems a bit...off...doesnt it?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 10:43 PM GMT
    I don't have Scruff or Grindr but I do know one thing - thanks to technology, people have gotten used to instant gratification. It's not like the bad old days when you could only get ice cream in the summer. Still no excuse for bad behavior - I imagine that most people "looking" simply play the numbers and move on if someone can't arrive on their doorstep within twenty minutes.
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    Jan 03, 2012 11:02 PM GMT
    Chainers said
    JakeBenson saidI put an ugly pic of me up on Grindr to keep from people hitting on me. I'm really just using it to find a place to live anyway. Gotta move out Feb-March.


    Using Grindr to find a place to live? Seems a bit...off...doesnt it?


    for people like yourself who are using the app to fuck I suppose. I already found a really nice potential roommate from it. Only problem was the walls were tenuous and I could hear mexican salsa music bass nearby and doors slamming. That was the only reason I couldn't move in.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2012 11:42 PM GMT
    JakeBenson said
    Chainers said
    JakeBenson saidI put an ugly pic of me up on Grindr to keep from people hitting on me. I'm really just using it to find a place to live anyway. Gotta move out Feb-March.


    Using Grindr to find a place to live? Seems a bit...off...doesnt it?


    for people like yourself who are using the app to fuck I suppose. I already found a really nice potential roommate from it. Only problem was the walls were tenuous and I could hear mexican salsa music bass nearby and doors slamming. That was the only reason I couldn't move in.


    When I travel I use it to find the best gyms, the good gay bars, the gay friendly restaurants.

    I deleted grindr because it was so sketchy, but I like Scruff... nice guys on there. Relatively.

    Of course the guy I was most attracted to and who I really liked lived 11,000 miles away... I was like, "Do you live on the surface of the sun? How the fuck can you get 11,000 miles away?" (Australia)

    Amazing to connect to Australia almost instantly with an app on my phone... incredible. It like it is 2012 or something!!
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    Jan 04, 2012 12:23 AM GMT
    I would reply "cry me a river bitch" and move on with my life.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2012 3:36 AM GMT
    I always ignore the messages that I get from Margaret. For whatever reason, she thinks I am God.

    "Are you there God?"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2012 3:48 AM GMT
    I can never do the instant hook ups. Its too much of a hassle and I'm usually occupied with work.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2012 4:00 AM GMT
    Technology has spoiled some people. They expect instant gratification, whether it be sex or a simple reply to an email message. Just ignore them.