Your next BF is out there right now


  • Jan 08, 2012 5:53 PM GMT
    I've been reading a lot of posts here about people not wanting to be single or depressed about an ex and wanted to throw in my 2 cents. Last year I became single after 7 years. I was really miserable for a minute but by leaning on my friends I got through it.

    I think that these things happen for a reason and it frees you to find the right person. It is not easy, especially in the gay world, to be over 40, single AND have standards. It's easy to get laid but as so many guys have posted here, not so easy to find that right someone.

    Personally, I do sometimes get tired of coming home alone when I go out (for example, it's Sunday morning and I'm in an empty house writing this post instead of rolling over onto someone) and it's disappointing when that hot guy you saw online never responds to your msg. But fuck him--He's obviously not the right guy. Just keep on keepin on, as they say. (Ok, I have no idea who "they" are or if "they" actually say that, but whatever).

    So for all of you out there who may be nursing a broken heart right now, time really does take care of that. You gotta believe the right guy will come into your life when he's supposed to. Love yourself first. DO feel free to rebound, but then stop. DON'T become a complete whore, or a bitter person who won't love anyone. Keep reaching out to everyone interesting you see online, even if none of them ever respond to you. When you're in a good mood, keep smiling at strangers (not just the ones you want to fuck, either). Lean on your friends as often as you need to--It's their job. Keep feeling every emotion you have--That's who you are.

    All you can do is live a good life and the right people will be in it.
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    Jan 08, 2012 6:16 PM GMT
    Now that's a great 1st post...I predict you won't be single much longer.
  • D300

    Posts: 86

    Jan 08, 2012 11:03 PM GMT
    Love this, great post!
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    Jan 08, 2012 11:06 PM GMT
    I wish you luck on your search.
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    Jan 08, 2012 11:06 PM GMT
    finally someone with a brain, i like you're attitudeicon_smile.gif
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    Jan 08, 2012 11:09 PM GMT
    Great post, but you know some people like playing the victim.


    Good to see you flexing your social skills, Seattle. icon_smile.gif
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    Jan 08, 2012 11:10 PM GMT
    SeattleRealtor said...

    All you can do is live a good life and the right people will be in it.


    THIS! It's true!
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    Jan 08, 2012 11:12 PM GMT
    wow....i needed this post..thanks!
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    Jan 08, 2012 11:13 PM GMT
    You make perfect sense, and I bet that you are an awesome guy. Great attitude!
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Jan 08, 2012 11:16 PM GMT
    wow, keep up the positive attitude buddy. i wish i was as positive as you. i have just come to the conclusion that it is not written in the stars for me
  • Greygull

    Posts: 282

    Jan 08, 2012 11:17 PM GMT
    Thanks for this.really.
  • tautomer

    Posts: 1010

    Jan 08, 2012 11:23 PM GMT
    Absolutely wonderfully said!
  • shirty

    Posts: 290

    Jan 09, 2012 12:00 AM GMT
    thanks for the positivity icon_smile.gif
  • suedeheadscot

    Posts: 1130

    Jan 09, 2012 12:15 AM GMT
    Aw cheers. I live in Birmingham in the UK where there really isn't a lot of variation of gay males (or gay males, for that example) and I fret quite a lot at the fact I can't seem to find a partner, despite trying all the traditional routes. I guess not giving hope is something I should bear in mind more. (I am thinking of moving this year back to Glasgow!).
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    Jan 09, 2012 12:19 AM GMT
    Marry me seattle!
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    Jan 09, 2012 12:36 AM GMT
    I've been in need of some good advice, and this was definitely a great thing to read. Thanks! icon_smile.gif
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    Jan 09, 2012 1:27 AM GMT
    Preach.gif
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    Jan 09, 2012 1:32 AM GMT
    Imagine that he is already here with you, and maybe you will meet him today. I like this posting.
  • cookingitswee...

    Posts: 445

    Jan 09, 2012 1:33 AM GMT
    SeattleRealtor saidI've been reading a lot of posts here about people not wanting to be single or depressed about an ex and wanted to throw in my 2 cents. Last year I became single after 7 years. I was really miserable for a minute but by leaning on my friends I got through it.

    I think that these things happen for a reason and it frees you to find the right person. It is not easy, especially in the gay world, to be over 40, single AND have standards. It's easy to get laid but as so many guys have posted here, not so easy to find that right someone.

    Personally, I do sometimes get tired of coming home alone when I go out (for example, it's Sunday morning and I'm in an empty house writing this post instead of rolling over onto someone) and it's disappointing when that hot guy you saw online never responds to your msg. But fuck him--He's obviously not the right guy. Just keep on keepin on, as they say. (Ok, I have no idea who "they" are or if "they" actually say that, but whatever).

    So for all of you out there who may be nursing a broken heart right now, time really does take care of that. You gotta believe the right guy will come into your life when he's supposed to. Love yourself first. DO feel free to rebound, but then stop. DON'T become a complete whore, or a bitter person who won't love anyone. Keep reaching out to everyone interesting you see online, even if none of them ever respond to you. When you're in a good mood, keep smiling at strangers (not just the ones you want to fuck, either). Lean on your friends as often as you need to--It's their job. Keep feeling every emotion you have--That's who you are.

    All you can do is live a good life and the right people will be in it.


    This is the most positive, uplifting, and sensible thing anyone has said in the history of real jock. Well done!
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    Jan 09, 2012 1:37 AM GMT
    i feel a little better lol thanks for the positivity. Lets hope so
  • safety43_mma1...

    Posts: 4251

    Jan 09, 2012 1:47 AM GMT
    u hit the nail on the head with that one. u got to have a lemons before u found that special one. u got to take a chance and go find him also. i figure the way i see it is yeah he may be out there but u dont know unless u r not afraid to fail at the same time.
  • beaujangle

    Posts: 1701

    Jan 09, 2012 1:49 AM GMT
    suedeheadscot saidAw cheers. I live in Birmingham in the UK where there really isn't a lot of variation of gay males (or gay males, for that example) and I fret quite a lot at the fact I can't seem to find a partner, despite trying all the traditional routes. I guess not giving hope is something I should bear in mind more. (I am thinking of moving this year back to Glasgow!).


    Oh I see. I had issues then in the 80s in Brummie. But haven't things changed a lot (for the better) these days in this city, I mean for the gay community?
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    Jan 09, 2012 1:53 AM GMT
    Thanks! icon_smile.gif
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    Jan 09, 2012 2:23 AM GMT
    a great read! words to live by.
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    Jan 09, 2012 2:32 AM GMT
    Loved every word. Really inspirational.