Unprotected sex ed.

  • NHsports

    Posts: 52

    Jan 12, 2012 5:27 PM GMT
    Hey guys hope you all can help.

    A friend of mine from this site is young and (in my opinion) made a big mistake. He has not been in a relationship or had many sexual experiences because he is in high school and not yet out. Recently he told me about a sexual encounter with a guy from manhunt. The scary thing is it was unprotected because the guy said he was clean.

    Now my friend is resisting my urges to get tested. I dont want to scare the guy so I am hoping you all can post something here so that he can read it and know the dangers of unprotected sex and the importance of taking responsibility.

    Thank you all
  • BmwKid92

    Posts: 1097

    Jan 12, 2012 5:29 PM GMT
    wowww, high school or not, everyone is born with a brain, also the older guy should rot in hell for what he did to the younger naive kid, wish nothing changed to the kid
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 5:42 PM GMT
    Show him a bunch of pictures of disgusting STDs. That works every time.
  • thatonedude21

    Posts: 223

    Jan 12, 2012 5:43 PM GMT
    Well, did he bottom or did he top?
    I'm assuming he probably bottomed which is much more risky than topping bareback.
    If he bottomed, and let the guy cum inside him his risks go up..
    Having only bottomed like that once when I first came out I can say I was just as scared as he is right now.
    No one can make him go and get tested, unfortunately, he'll have to do it on his own.
    Hopefully he makes the right decision, besides chances are he is okay!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 5:47 PM GMT
    Well, is he regretting the decision or is he just not seeing the importance of getting tested? If it's the former, your job is much easier. Just encourage him to get tested in a few weeks, since antibody tests won't work within up to six weeks of infection. If this happened in the last two days or so, he can opt for nonoccupational PEP. I took Truvada for a month after a risky sexual experience. It's not definitive if I was ever exposed, but my HIV test came back negative after a month on Truvada.

    If he's unwilling to get tested because he just doesn't care, make sure to let him know that any flu-like symptoms would point to a likelihood that he is seroconverting. You might also ask him to get tested not for himself, but for whoever he might sleep with. If you frame it that some guys will ask for test paperwork (as I do), he might be more willing to get tested just to have that.
  • NHsports

    Posts: 52

    Jan 12, 2012 5:49 PM GMT
    Thanks guys! He is a great person, I just dont think he understands the risks that are out there. The main concenr of mine is that he put 100% faith into this guy's word that he was clean.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 5:50 PM GMT
    If he's 18 ignore the rest of below.

    If he's not first A) how do you know this underaged kid and B) can't make him do anything just hope he's smart enough
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 5:52 PM GMT
    To the OP,
    Is it safe to assume this kid is at least 18 years of age?

    If he isn't, you should not be his counsel, he should not be on RealJock and he definitely should not be on mancunt!

    To the OP's friend,
    Assuming you're 18 years of age or older, I hope you have the name and address and/or phone number of this guy because you may be needing to call him after you get your test results back.

    Contrary to popular belief, no often means yes, and "I'm clean" often means "I'm looking to infect you," or "I haven't been tested, but I feel fine so I must be clean."

    You shouldn't have to face your mortality until much later in life. It would suck to have to face it at such a young age, but the baton was passed to you - a baton that you willingly accepted - so do the right thing. Moving forward, make sure every guy looking to stick his cock up your ass has a rubber on. If he refuses to wear one because he doesn't like how they feel, he can't maintain an erection with them, or he simply refuses, then you can engage in frot, or just jerk each other off.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 5:54 PM GMT
    It has raised a good question though;
    Can you have a safe bareback session?
    I do notice the barebacking trend coming back....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 6:05 PM GMT
    Getting tested won't stop him from having contracted HIV or other diseases. Your friend just wants to maintain deniability for use on with others and on himself. All it takes is one exposure to an infected individual and you're potentially infected for life. All that's left is to figure out what he's potentially infected with so he can find out what treatments he needs to start. Maybe that's the harsh truth you need to tell your friend.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 6:26 PM GMT
    thatonedude21 saidWell, did he bottom or did he top?
    I'm assuming he probably bottomed which is much more risky than topping bareback.
    If he bottomed, and let the guy cum inside him his risks go up..
    Having only bottomed like that once when I first came out I can say I was just as scared as he is right now.
    No one can make him go and get tested, unfortunately, he'll have to do it on his own.
    Hopefully he makes the right decision, besides chances are he is okay!




    well said manicon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 6:32 PM GMT
    It's okay to get tested, I'm getting tested today. For my state of mind. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 6:36 PM GMT
    Even if he decide to get tested, you/he need to understand the window period (usually take up to 60 to 90 days to show on the test) that if he got infected with HIV..STI might take up to two weeks to show on the test….There are programs at community based organization for youth and young adult most these program like single session of skills building workshop to HIV education, build self-esteem and ask partner about HIV status also negotiating skills. And most these agencies have funding from state and federal so they give these young guys incentives up to $50 dollars.

    At the end you can’t force him to get tested also scary tactic doesn’t work

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 6:46 PM GMT
    ONE THIRD of those who are infected do NOT know they are.
    Testing has a lag time and your test can come back as negative last week and you get infected yesterday.. That means your/his 'negative' test is INVALID even if it was LAST week!


    NEVER trust ANYONE who says they are 'negative' or "clean" (which is a vulgar term)

    NEVER bareback UNLESS you are willing to pay the price up to and including your life. PERIOD!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:20 PM GMT
    Fear is a powerful motivator. People normally won't examine their own behaviour or do anything unless it directly impacts them and smacks them in the gob.

    A friend of mine just died from AIDS. He was diagnosed last year and NO drug cocktail, protease inhibitor, or therapy worked to get the virus under control.

    HE"S DEAD because of poor judgement and not using a condom. HIV / AIDS is alive and well.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:21 PM GMT
    Get tested...



    This song was written by me.. for TrevorMark.. we both think you need to keep this in mind ;) Dont we Trevvy?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:28 PM GMT
    An infected person can easily transmit by getting into oral as well.
  • NHsports

    Posts: 52

    Jan 12, 2012 7:44 PM GMT
    Thanks guys! Some well said things here
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:44 PM GMT
    graphicb saidAn infected person can easily transmit by getting into oral as well.


    sorry man but that not true

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:47 PM GMT
    Gymnast_Guy said
    graphicb saidAn infected person can easily transmit by getting into oral as well.


    sorry man but that not true



    I guess everyone idea differs on that, I read that pre-cum carries the virus.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:48 PM GMT
    I want to write directly to the young guy who had unprotected sex.

    The desire to have unprotected sex is really strong, it is with everyone and no one can make the decision to have safe sex for you.

    You could ask ten different guys and get ten different answers about what is an acceptable level of risk because everyone has different levels of comfort with unprotected sex.

    The path you just took a stroll down is by far one of the riskiest by any guys standard and it put you at great, GREAT risk. *I PROMISE YOU* the best sex of your life is yet to be had! Don't try to exhaust all frontiers all at once.

    Practicing safe sex, learning about STD risks while you learn about your body and the FABULOUS experience of someone else exploring it, ensures that when you are ready to have unprotected sex, in whatever context you are going to do it in, is not going to be something you regret.

    Go to a free clinic and don't just get tested but also get STD counseling so you can learn the different risks associated with different behaviors. Learn about what you are putting yourself at risk of contracting and ultimately, how to protect yourself.

    You are priceless and irreplaceable, you are worth Protecting and worth the Education of learning what you are up against and what we all are up against.

    The Gay community can be full of predators, and it is up to you to protect yourself because ultimately you gave away a very, very precious gift to a stranger...

    -- Your life is worth more than that
    -- Your future is worth more than that
    -- Your body is worth more than that
    -- You are worth more than that

    Make good choices... because you are ultimately the only one who has to live with them.
    Please make good choices, I may never see your sweet young face... but I want it around for a long, long time.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 7:52 PM GMT
    Gymnast_Guy said
    graphicb saidAn infected person can easily transmit by getting into oral as well.


    sorry man but that not true



    There is an increased risk of transmission IF the person doing the sucking has open sores in their mouth (including having just been to the dentist in the past few days) AND if the they take cum in their mouth while having sores....

    http://www.actoronto.org/safersucking

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 8:05 PM GMT
    That sounds like a scary situation to be in. He's definitely at risk and should get tested as soon as possible and then again in a couple months since the tests may not revel anything for awhile. I don't know how you teach someone to be safe and responsible but this kid sure wasn't being either. He may not care about himself but he should also think about his future partners. Engaging in this risky behavior means he could become infected and then infect other people before he finds out he's got anything. Ask him how he'd feel if he found out he'd infected other people. That might make him take better care of himself.

    Oh, and if he's not 18 years old, there are a ton of other issues that get raised and not just that he shouldn't be on Real Jock or Manhunt. If he was having sex with someone over 18 years old, it's statutory rape.
  • camfer

    Posts: 892

    Jan 12, 2012 8:12 PM GMT
    I just got tested last week. It was easy. The tester pricked my finger and dabbed some blood onto a thingy. That was painless. He took the thingy out of the room. Then we talked for 10 minutes. He went out and got the thingy and came back. Told me I was negative. No cost, completely anonymous, very convenient. I did it out of respect for myself and respect for my partner. It's better to know your status.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 12, 2012 8:13 PM GMT
    Xelorate said
    Gymnast_Guy said
    graphicb saidAn infected person can easily transmit by getting into oral as well.


    sorry man but that not true



    There is an increased risk of transmission IF the person doing the sucking has open sores in their mouth (including having just been to the dentist in the past few days) AND if the they take cum in their mouth while having sores....

    http://www.actoronto.org/safersucking



    I agree, but how many of us check the inside of the guys mouth before engaging in oral? I mean who does that?

    Also read the link you send me, it says "suck and lick only the shaft and balls, avoiding the head of his cock."

    Avoiding the head of the cock? icon_lol.gif