Wahey, it's another first date date thread!

  • sbwlguy

    Posts: 566

    Jan 15, 2012 11:16 AM GMT
    So I went on a date yesterday with a very attractive guy I met through Facebook (friend of a friend). I didn't know anything about him beforehand which was nice seeing as there were no preconceived notions.

    We had quite a bit in common, but what was particularly nice was that he was also very tall! He is 6'3, I'm 6'5. The plan was only to have a coffee, but we ended up going to the movies after the coffee and the date lasted the best part of 6 hours.

    Now I don't want to jinx anything, but I'm wondering whether more good stuff is going to come from this. I hope so! I will text him later and suggest meeting again and just take it from there. He is 10 years older than me, so hopefully this doesn't make too much of a difference. I like to believe that he also had a good time yesterday.
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    Jan 15, 2012 3:11 PM GMT
    I love this part of the relationship, when it's so full of possibilities and you're still figuring out how to like each other. Good luck, he's a lucky guy
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    Jan 15, 2012 5:48 PM GMT
    Yes! A positive date thread!

    Awesome that you guys hit it off. I wish you all the best on date #2.
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    Jan 15, 2012 5:51 PM GMT
    sbwlguy saidSo I went on a date yesterday with a very attractive guy I met through Facebook (friend of a friend). I didn't know anything about him beforehand which was nice seeing as there were no preconceived notions.

    We had quite a bit in common, but what was particularly nice was that he was also very tall! He is 6'3, I'm 6'5. The plan was only to have a coffee, but we ended up going to the movies after the coffee and the date lasted the best part of 6 hours.

    Now I don't want to jinx anything, but I'm wondering whether more good stuff is going to come from this. I hope so! I will text him later and suggest meeting again and just take it from there. He is 10 years older than me, so hopefully this doesn't make too much of a difference. I like to believe that he also had a good time yesterday.


    about time hearing of a positive date. good luck
  • mybud

    Posts: 11819

    Jan 15, 2012 6:07 PM GMT
    Congrats....The only advice I'd give ya is to erase the ideal of being "jinxed" for stating a fact ...Negative thought breeds more negative thought...Your unique qualities will make the positive results you seek...All the best...Steve
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    Jan 15, 2012 7:53 PM GMT
    sbwlguy saidI like to believe that he also had a good time yesterday.


    Nobody spends six hours on a date if they aren't having a good time.
  • buckled

    Posts: 165

    Jan 16, 2012 2:41 AM GMT
    somnia said
    sbwlguy saidI like to believe that he also had a good time yesterday.


    Nobody spends six hours on a date if they aren't having a good time.


    This... Congrats =) Can't wait to see the updates.
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    Jan 16, 2012 2:42 AM GMT
    yayicon_biggrin.gif
  • sbwlguy

    Posts: 566

    Jan 16, 2012 10:21 AM GMT
    The one issue I have with having been on a good date is patience. Do any of you guys also struggle with this sometimes?

    I sent him a text yesterday to say had a nice time blah blah blah and suggested what we could do the next time. He replied saying he also had a great time and would be up for what I suggested but didn't actually mention a date. So I replied saying he should let me know when is good for him. So far, no reply.

    This is the sort of thing where doubt creeps in and makes me think that maybe I read the situation wrong and that he thinks I'm nice but just not that into me.

    Oh well.
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    Jan 16, 2012 10:28 AM GMT
    sbwlguy saidThe one issue I have with having been on a good date is patience. Do any of you guys also struggle with this sometimes?

    I sent him a text yesterday to say had a nice time blah blah blah and suggested what we could do the next time. He replied saying he also had a great time and would be up for what I suggested but didn't actually mention a date. So I replied saying he should let me know when is good for him. So far, no reply.

    This is the sort of thing where doubt creeps in and makes me think that maybe I read the situation wrong and that he thinks I'm nice but just not that into me.

    Oh well.


    It's been one day... PATIENCE!
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    Jan 16, 2012 10:38 AM GMT
    haha, it takes at least 3 days 4 most guys 2 get back 2 u--no matter how good a time they had. or so i've figured out.
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    Jan 16, 2012 11:21 AM GMT
    This thread makes me smile.

    Good things come to those who wait. If it were me, I'd do what you did, probably wait until next weekend is closing in. If he still hasn't responded by then I'd propose something to make it easier and see if he's interested.
  • sbwlguy

    Posts: 566

    Jan 16, 2012 12:35 PM GMT
    Well the reason that I feel awkward is that, based on previous correspondence, he is usually quick to respond.

    I have obviously let the ball in his court to let me know when he wants to meet next. I don't want to wait a week with no reply then be the one approach him again and see when he wants to meet.

    Anyway, I guess we'll see. Either way I'm going to feel like a bit of an idiot or learn that patience will reward me with something good.
  • DanOmatic

    Posts: 1155

    Jan 16, 2012 12:48 PM GMT
    We've all been in the same spot as you, OP. It's hard when emotions are high to keep things in perspective. Take a deep breath, go about your day, see your friends, and hope for the best. You've indicated your interest, which is all you can really do at this point. Just hold yourself back from the temptation to contact him before he's done so. If there's no word by the weekend, suggest something low key, like coffee, and see if he responds. If he doesn't respond, then you have your answer.

    But be optimistic--it may all work out. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.
  • sbwlguy

    Posts: 566

    Jan 22, 2012 7:28 PM GMT
    Well, I have an update, and it's not a good one I'm afraid to say.

    The Sunday after our date I sent a text saying I had a good time and suggested what we could do next time. He replied saying he had a good time too and of course he is up for what I suggested. He even ended with an 'x'. I then replied saying he should let me know when it works for him and we'll pencil it in.

    He never replied to that text. The Mon, Tue and Wed I felt awkward enough just waiting for a response, like anyone would do after a good time with someone. By the Thu and Fri my head was just fucking with me.

    I couldn't handle the waiting anymore. On my way to the gym tonight I phoned him but it went to voicemail. I didn't leave a message but sent a cordial text asking how he was. My guess is that he probably won't reply to that.

    I am just so very confused. I think I'm a pretty good judge of character. Why would he accept my request on Facebook and answer with a nice text message after the date. We DID have a good time. I mean, if you don't have a good time on a first date you won't get to hang out for six hours.

    What drives me crazy is that there is just no contact or anything. All I ask for is honesty. I can totally handle if he just told me he wasn't into me or whatever... But by not responding or anything I feel like a used old rag that's been tossed around; it's a complete disregard for my feelings.

    I guess I did dodge a bullet, but it is very confusing to me...
  • DanOmatic

    Posts: 1155

    Jan 27, 2012 1:10 PM GMT
    Sorry to hear that, OP. It's very disappointing when that happens. There are unfortunately a lot of flaky, superficial guys out there. He is obviously one of them. Sounds like you approached it with sufficient patience and restraint, so whatever his deal is, you can't reproach yourself.

    It is confusing and frustrating. The best way to deal with it is to distract yourself with other good things going on in your life. Go spend time with friends and try to have fun; don't let this hold you back from enjoying yourself.