Unsure of what he wants....

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2012 6:51 AM GMT
    Ok, I need some opinions from some of you who have a bit more experience in regards to dating/relationships.

    I started seeing this guy in the middle of November. We started going out on dates or just spending time together at least 3 times a week, and things seemed pretty cool. We have a lot of similar interests and we seemed to be connecting well.

    Well, after spending time those first few weeks getting to know each other and all of that, and seeming to move along pretty well (and no, that's not code for we had sex, because we didn't), he starts distancing himself all of a sudden, like I had the plague or something. He states that he want to take things slow, because he has some issues on his end and doesn't want me to get hurt and all of that. I understand that people have issues/concerns to deal with, especially after having come out of a LTR, but it just seemed weird that all of a sudden this was an issue, seeing that HE approached ME in the first place, and kept pushing things a little bit further.

    Now it's at a point where it's like pulling teeth to get a response at all from this guy...and i'm not calling/texting with a marriage proposal or anything, just a "Hey, makin sure you are still alive".

    I just want some advice as to what you guys would do if you were in my situation. Honestly, I don't feel like it's worth my time waiting around for nothing, but I don't want to seem like the insensitive jerk because I wouldn't give him time to sort out his feelings and such.

    Any feedback would be appreciated. Thanks!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2012 3:26 PM GMT
    When a guy makes excuses for not having sex there is no chemistry. Move on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2012 3:33 PM GMT
    he could be pushing himself away because he's not really into you the same way he sees you are into him. i know it sounds tough, but i've been there. the more you let on that you really care about him the more he will run away. icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 16, 2012 10:08 PM GMT
    Thank you both for your responses! I've definitely been moving towards letting it go, but I just wanted to make sure I wasn't jumping ahead and "giving up" too early.

    Thanks again!
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Jan 16, 2012 10:16 PM GMT
    Alpha13 saidWhen a guy makes excuses for not having sex there is no chemistry. Move on.


    agreed, that or they found another- move on live and learn. When someone says 'It's not you it me." It's you.icon_idea.gif
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Jan 16, 2012 10:32 PM GMT
    I say do not contact him. Let him contact you. If he does not contact you back than you have your answer. Its time for you to move on
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 17, 2012 12:44 AM GMT
    I had the same situation a year and half ago. He finally decides to join RJ and sends me a message icon_eek.gif. Seriously, I dont know how to read these guys. They're like a mystery but not worth going after. You'll just really kill yourself thinking you did something wrong.