Would you take that HIV test?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:00 AM GMT
    If you were in a relationship would you require that both you and your partner take an HIV test every month? Or if not your partner, would you just take one?
    To minimize the risk of your partner cheating without a condom
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jan 25, 2012 3:00 AM GMT
    I wouldn't not use a condom.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:03 AM GMT
    williamlbrown saidIf you were in a relationship would you require that both you and your partner take an HIV test every month? Or if not your partner, would you just take one?
    To minimize the risk of your partner cheating without a condom



    So the main issue is cheating or STD?

    I doubt it is the former but you gotta trust to have a fun-loving long term relationship. If you are questioning you don't trust. Personally, I am in the favour of HIV test once in a while but every month is way too much.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:14 AM GMT
    Sounds like a big ol lack of trust, you should probably get out of that relationship early if you are going to have them tested every month, unless its an open relationship then you better set some serious ground rules
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:14 AM GMT
    Why does it have to be a trust issue? Can't it be a requirement for all potential partners?
  • araphael

    Posts: 1148

    Jan 25, 2012 3:15 AM GMT
    Yes I would. It has nothing to do with trust but with wisdom.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:17 AM GMT
    williamlbrown saidWhy does it have to be a trust issue? Can't it be a requirement for all potential partners?


    Because if you are in a (monogamous) relationship then you shouldn't have to worry about them having sex with another person right? If you need them to take a test every month that just means you don't trust what they are doing when you are not around right?
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:42 AM GMT
    Yes I would, but I would also be using condoms, even with my partner.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:52 AM GMT
    hmmm
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:54 AM GMT
    Sounds like a shitty relationship. I don't know any straight couple that uses them when the wife is on birth control. Why would it be different for 2 gay guys who were in a monogamous relationship.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:57 AM GMT
    Basing the decision of unsafe sex on the results of a test that is prone to false readings seems a bit misguided.
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    Jan 25, 2012 3:58 AM GMT
    RobertF64 saidBasing the decision of unsafe sex on the results of a test that is prone to false readings seems a bit misguided.


    It can also take up to 6 months for the virus to even be detected by the test.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:03 AM GMT
    Either you trust your monogamous man or you don't...

    If you're both pledged to each other, how is a monthly STD test any different than forcing him to take a monthly lie detector?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:04 AM GMT
    It's a pre req for my partner and I to get tested twice a year. No if ands or butts on it. If he doesn't like it he can take a hike...
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:06 AM GMT
    b1o2y3456 saidSounds like a shitty relationship. I don't know any straight couple that uses them when the wife is on birth control. Why would it be different for 2 gay guys who were in a monogamous relationship.


    Because unless you're trying to make a baby, you should ALWAYS wear a condom. Even the straight people that you mentioned should wear condoms too.
  • leojock1985

    Posts: 76

    Jan 25, 2012 4:07 AM GMT
    umm this is how people get HIV.. bottom line is monogamous or not.. people cheat!! STRAIGHT GAY BI.. the whole 9 yards here!! How many of us know married straight guys who go to gay bars?.. How many of us have been in a monogamous relationship and been cheated on.. How many people do you hear getting HIV or an STD from their "monogamous" partner

    Wake up and smell the roses... they ain't that fresh and rosey!!

    Oo and making them take any test every day week month or year will not prevent them from doing what they wish!!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:09 AM GMT
    sportyred said
    Because unless you're trying to make a baby, you should ALWAYS wear a condom. Even the straight people that you mentioned should wear condoms too.


    What a barren, paranoid, loveless world that is...
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:10 AM GMT
    I'm fine with every 2 to 3 months; as well as immediately after any time we're separated, open, playing together/group play; or in a public or work place situation that may raise concern for STD transmission.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:15 AM GMT
    Sure. I'm dating a guy who is HIV+ (I'm HIV-). He told me right from the beginning, and we use condoms all the time and we always will. I will probably still go in for a blood test every six months just to be sure and I have no problem with that.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:16 AM GMT
    I think early on in the relationship if we wanted to forego using condoms and were monogamous I would take one. I don't think we would need to take another as long as we were honest and faithful. Maybe that's naive but it's how I feel.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:17 AM GMT
    knowwonder saidI'm fine with every 2 to 3 months; as well as immediately after any time we're separated, open, playing together/group play; or in a public or work place situation that may raise concern for STD transmission.


    Oh hell yeah If you have an open relationship of any kind then you both should get tested every week!
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:20 AM GMT
    someguy saidI think early on in the relationship if we wanted to forego using condoms and were monogamous I would take one. I don't think we would need to take another as long as we were honest and faithful. Maybe that's naive but it's how I feel.


    Yea throwing the condom away is fine but getting tested should be taken periodically
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:21 AM GMT
    Every month? If my partner said that craziness, it's over. I would never cheat on anyone, and he needs to trust me as I trust him. That's why you have to pick your partner very, very carefully before you start having unprotected sex.
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    Jan 25, 2012 4:30 AM GMT
    I don't mind the whole wanting to get tested bit inasmuch as I simply feel that doing it every single month is too frequent. But if he wants me to get tested so he feels reassured, I have no problem doing it for him because I am certain that I'm going to test HIV-. My exposure to any risk factors for HIV has been pretty darn close to zero so far in my life. (...yes, I'm still an anal virgin...icon_sad.gif)
  • Trepeat

    Posts: 546

    Jan 25, 2012 4:31 AM GMT
    Every month is a bit excessive- it`s not like testing more often prevents HIV transmission.

    However, testing every three to six months seems reasonable, to me. Love and trust are two of the most important things in the world, but your own well-being matters too- which is why it`s never a bad idea to consistently use condoms, even in a monogamous LTR. If you use proper protection, the odds of contracting HIV are likely smaller than the odds of having your trust breached- even if you`re entirely certain that it never would be.

    If you trust your partner enough to not wear condoms, be aware that your faith in him to be monogamous doesn`t make you immune from contracting the virus. Condoms are a safer bet, for preventing transmission. As many loving, faithful, monogamous couples as there are out there who forego the use of protection because they trust each other completely, there are still others who get test results that shatter their worlds because their trust was misplaced.

    I`m not saying don`t trust anyone ever, but do be aware that all it can take is one breach of trust to potentially contract something nasty.