What are your thoughts on the following statements, part 2?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2012 8:01 PM GMT
    What you find attractive in others is what you find unattractive in yourself

    OR

    What you find attractive in others is what you find most attractive about yourself

    Discuss.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Jan 26, 2012 8:22 PM GMT
    huh? what are you talking about?
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    Jan 26, 2012 8:25 PM GMT
    EastCoastNAZ saidWhat you find attractive in others is what you find unattractive in yourself

    OR

    What you find attractive in others is what you find most attractive about yourself

    Discuss.


    What I find attractive in others is what I find most attractive about myself. I've met too many people, on a number of occasions, that don't have the same ideas, etc... that I have. The problem is, for the most part, I don't agree with these people, because it doesn't make any sense to me. It's sad but I see a lot of people who live this very fake existence. I don't want my social interactions to be fake, I want them to mean something. Unless someone has something better to offer, THAN I might reconsider...but until then, no!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2012 8:28 PM GMT
    1) What you find attractive in yourself, you find attractive in another

    2) What you find unattractive in yourself, you find unattractive in another

    3) What you find unattractive in yourself, you find the opposite attractive OR unattractive in another


    examples:

    1) athletic abilities.. kindness,.. humour... if you like them about yourself, you will like them about another.. they remind you of the qualities in yourself that you admire

    2) tardiness.. moodiness... laziness... if you dislike such things about yourself, you will dislike it in another even more.. as they confront you with undesirable traits you have yourself

    3) if you are a person who is often tardy, you may admire the person who is always on time because that is how you would like to be.. that can make the person attractive... but you might become jealous of that person.. and then you will find them unattractive


    Just what my impression is
  • Generaleclect...

    Posts: 504

    Jan 26, 2012 8:35 PM GMT
    I think most people would agree more with the second statement.

    Anyone with a decent self-esteem would think that their own personal qualities are healthy and worth having, so they want to see it in other guys.

    Hence the people here who a big reason for working out is to attract similar men.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2012 8:38 PM GMT
    Personally I don't think either is 100% true for me.

    I see myself as Caucasian, hairy, average-sized, bearded, with a "cute" face.

    I find many different types of people attractive. Ethnicity is not an issue, I have found hairless guys and hairy guys hot, I've found bigger/"fat" guys attractive, I've found muscular guys attractive, I've found guys attractive with or without facial hair, handsome guys, cute guys, hot guys, etc.
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    Jan 26, 2012 8:42 PM GMT
    Anduru saidPersonally I don't think either is 100% true for me.

    I see myself as Caucasian, hairy, average-sized, bearded, with a "cute" face.

    I find many different types of people attractive. Ethnicity is not an issue, I have found hairless guys and hairy guys hot, I've found bigger/"fat" guys attractive, I've found muscular guys attractive, I've found guys attractive with or without facial hair, handsome guys, cute guys, hot guys, etc.


    What about personality-wise vs. physical? Just curious.
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    Jan 27, 2012 1:26 AM GMT
    EastCoastNAZ saidWhat about personality-wise vs. physical? Just curious.
    Personality-wise I am attracted to people who are opposite to me in that I have an aggressive personality and my moods are quite volatile, so I need somebody who is calm and grounded to balance with my personality.

    Some personality traits must be the same for me though. I'm not a genius by any means but I am innately intelligent and have little trouble learning new skills and concepts, and this is also something that I need to see in my friends or boyfriend.

    Some other personality traits are up in the air; for instance, I'm really bitchy and have some friends who are bitchy with me, but also have friends who are very kind yet find my bitchy side funny.
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    Jan 27, 2012 1:38 AM GMT
    The latter. I think? I don't know...I don't really evaluate a guy based upon his comparison to me. As long as he is loyal, aggressive, and chaotic; and as long as he isn't an XX about simple, stupid shit...but the moment he throws an XX-trantum, I'm done. I'm over him faster than a fat kid can fall out of a chair to get a cupcake from the floor.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2012 1:41 AM GMT
    What's next? What is the sound of one hand clapping?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2012 4:33 AM GMT
    swimguychicago saidWhat's next? What is the sound of one hand clapping?


    Sorry, didn't mean for you to actually try to use the one brain cell you have..icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2012 4:35 AM GMT
    The more someone reminds me of myself, the more I dislike them.
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    Jan 27, 2012 4:51 AM GMT
    Personality wise it's all opposites for me. I find my creativity and grasp of fine art my most attractive quality, but I'd never want to be in a relationship with another artist or someone in a creative field. I need someone who brings in something totally different.
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    Jan 27, 2012 5:03 AM GMT
    Personally, I can appreciate your typical, broad shouldered, muscular body with a strong jaw line and a nice set of eyes man's man. Those attributes are opposite of mine. I have the frame, just not the bulk, but if I were to be in the most physically fit shape of my life, I don't think I would stray towards other men with opposite attributes. I do think however, the people we find attractive are ideal to what we would look like in our own skin, so I'm drawn to manly men.

    Metaphysically, I think it would start to get somewhat annoying or too similar(?) if a guy shared qualities of interests including artistic approaches and creativity. I'd like for a guy to have diversity. I wouldn't want to marry myself, how egotistical do you think I am?
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    Jan 27, 2012 5:14 AM GMT
    I guess I never answered my own question(s)


    What you find attractive in others is what you find unattractive in yourself
    - I actually find this to be true for me from the physical perspective. I feel my legs and calves are the weakest physical part of me so I always gravitate towards guys with great legs and calves. Facially, much the same. I don't like my round features, so I always look for the strong jaw/cheekbones.


    What you find attractive in others is what you find most attractive about yourself
    - it's always good to find things in common with someone, but not so much that there's no growth in the relationship. having too much in common is a turnoff for me. I typically look for someone who is very opposite of me. I tend to be introverted and calculated. I am very attracted to guys who are playfully goofy and somewhat free-spirited.