In "like" with a Partnered guy

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    Jan 29, 2012 11:28 PM GMT
    What would you do if you met someone (a new friend) who has a partner, but you and this friend were flirting a lot and then kissed a lot. Would you still be friends with him? Or would you stop out of fear of being hurt?
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:36 PM GMT
    Maybe they have an open relationship? As long as everyone involved knows about each other, I don't think it's a problem. But if you're looking for something exclusive, then it would probably be best to stop the flirt/kiss stuff and keep things in the friend zone.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:43 PM GMT
    Someone be triflin icon_razz.gif
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:44 PM GMT
    If you're kissing on someone who has a partner and you don't know that the relationship is open then you would be at worst a homewrecker, at best an accomplice to your new friend's cheating.

    If you're kissing on someone who you know is in an open relationship which allows kissing, then if you are not looking for love, enjoy yourself. If you are looking for love, you risk heartbreak.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:47 PM GMT
    Well, he told me that kissing is "OK" although I have a feeling it could go further next time if I wanted it to. Apparently the boyfriend doesn't care about kissing. I just wonder if I should stop because I might develop feelings for my friend.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:49 PM GMT
    The fact that you're concerned about this, should tell you to stop. icon_wink.gif
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:52 PM GMT
    I would think most open relationships that allow for physical contact outside the relationship would more likely stipulate sex with no kissing rather than kissing with no sex.

    Regardless, if you think you will develop feelings of attachment, I suspect you are setting yourself up either for a fall, or to be the fallguy of this guys inevitably eventual failed relationship.

    You may in the end wind up with the love of your life, but it might come at a high price.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:52 PM GMT
    xrichx saidThe fact that you're concerned about this, should tell you to stop. icon_wink.gif


    You're right, I guess I'm thinking I can be Angelina Jolie, but I'd probably end up hurt instead of successful in winning my friend away from his partner.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:53 PM GMT
    What do you want?
    If you're fine knowing that this can't possibly go anywhere and are ok with it just being flirting and kissing with an unavailable guy, I guess there's no problem.
    If you want something more, then put the brakes on it now.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:53 PM GMT
    Is his partner terminally ill?

    Is his partner sexually defunct?

    Is his partner a woman?

    Do you have a soul?

    If you answer yes or no to any of these questions then I don't know what you should do.
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:55 PM GMT
    Esper said
    xrichx saidThe fact that you're concerned about this, should tell you to stop. icon_wink.gif

    You're right, I guess I'm thinking I can be Angelina Jolie, but I'd probably end up hurt instead of successful in winning my friend away from his partner.
    Wait.. what? Your intent was to steal this guy from his partner?

    Claystation saidSomeone be triflin icon_razz.gif
    icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
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    Jan 29, 2012 11:59 PM GMT
    Well, I guess honestly I do have feelings for this friend. Of course in a perfect world he would be single but he's not. He told me that his boyfriend "does his own thing" and while they don't have an open relationship, he (my friend) has kissed other guys. But he told me he hasn't kissed any other guys as much as me.
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:00 AM GMT
    Esper saidWell, I guess honestly I do have feelings for this friend. Of course in a perfect world he would be single but he's not. He told me that his boyfriend "does his own thing" and while they don't have an open relationship, he (my friend) has kissed other guys. But he told me he hasn't kissed any other guys as much as me.


    Awwww shit someones gonna get their feelings hurt and its not the "friend"
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:00 AM GMT
    Esper saidWhat would you do if you met someone (a new friend) who has a partner, but you and this friend were flirting a lot and then kissed a lot. Would you still be friends with him? Or would you stop out of fear of being hurt?

    Do you have any concern about hurting the partner of your "friend"?
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:01 AM GMT
    Esper saidWell, I guess honestly I do have feelings for this friend. Of course in a perfect world he would be single but he's not. He told me that his boyfriend "does his own thing" and while they don't have an open relationship, he (my friend) has kissed other guys. But he told me he hasn't kissed any other guys as much as me.


    That's all you need to know. Every action you take beyond knowing that reflects directly upon you.
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:01 AM GMT
    Esper saidWell, I guess honestly I do have feelings for this friend. Of course in a perfect world he would be single but he's not. He told me that his boyfriend "does his own thing" and while they don't have an open relationship, he (my friend) has kissed other guys. But he told me he hasn't kissed any other guys as much as me.
    If things go sour between them, I guess you'll be the rebound guy. That will be your chance to swoop in for the kill.
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:03 AM GMT
    I'm more concerned with my own feelings than the feelings of my friend's partner, just becuase the partner has flirted with me in the past too (but i'm not into him in that way)
  • Timbales

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    Jan 30, 2012 12:05 AM GMT
    Monogamous partners don't kiss other people.
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:05 AM GMT
    Esper saidI'm more concerned with my own feelings than the feelings of my friend's partner, just becuase the partner has flirted with me in the past too (but i'm not into him in that way)


    Dont worry brah, once he leaves his BF/partner/whatever for you, you'll never icon_rolleyes.gif have to worry about him doing that to you (making out with other guys) I mean its not like something he does a lot
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:07 AM GMT
    Never. This was a special exception. I'm glad you are able to recognize it, too.


    Claystation said
    Esper saidI'm more concerned with my own feelings than the feelings of my friend's partner, just becuase the partner has flirted with me in the past too (but i'm not into him in that way)


    Dont worry brah, once he leaves his BF/partner/whatever for you, you'll never icon_rolleyes.gif have to worry about him doing that to you (making out with other guys) I mean its not like something he does a lot
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:08 AM GMT
    LOL. Good point. If Esper and friend ended up together somehow, I'm not sure how he could handle seeing the guy mackin everything that moves.
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:09 AM GMT
    ConfederateGhost saidNever. This was a special exception. I'm glad you are able to recognize it, too.


    I have a good eye for these things, I don't brag I mostly boast icon_razz.gif
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:12 AM GMT
    Esper said
    xrichx saidThe fact that you're concerned about this, should tell you to stop. icon_wink.gif


    You're right, I guess I'm thinking I can be Angelina Jolie, but I'd probably end up hurt instead of successful in winning my friend away from his partner.

    That's a super plan. Gold star type plan.
    A guy that you can steal away from his partner is a guy that some other guy could steal away from you.
    If you can steal him away from his partner he isn't worth stealing.
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:13 AM GMT
    As I type this my freind is texting me and asking what I'm having for dinner. That's the thing. He's very attentive and that's one of the things I like about him. But he's not single icon_sad.gif
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    Jan 30, 2012 12:14 AM GMT
    Esper saidAs I type this my freind is texting me and asking what I'm having for dinner. That's the thing. He's very attentive and that's one of the things I like about him. But he's not single icon_sad.gif


    Tell him your having a big ol bowl of reality icon_biggrin.gif