Why some guys are not verified!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 28, 2008 2:28 PM GMT
    Well I am one and this is why. We all know that some gay guys are very vindictive and like to out other guys, especially when they are turned down by guys that don't want them. Yes I am not out to everyone in my life and I don't wish to have someone find out by someone outing me. It is my business to tell and no one else’s. Yes I take the risk of that by being on here, but if I am not verified then all I have to say that isn't me. Plus, what risks do you really take by talking to someone that is not verified? Are most guys on here really meeting up? And if you do meet someone, hopefully you are smart enough to verify them on your own.

    There are a couple of guys that are verified that I have wanted to meet and it hasn't gone far even though they know it is really me. Not really sure what makes the difference in being verified when it comes to "online dating!" Isn't it just a fantasy? When I unlock my pics you can tell that I'm a for real guy! Its obvious!

    Everyone has their own opinion, and I would like to hear it! Except for "liltanker!" Why does he follow me all over this site? EWWW and WEIRD!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 28, 2008 2:41 PM GMT
    I'm lazy that's why I'm not verified. lot's of the guys' on here are probably not interested in dealing with unverified people for the reasons u listed. I think as well, most gay men that are out prefer to be with other guys that are out. Its hard to go back in the closet for someone thats not 100% out. At least thats my opinion.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 28, 2008 2:47 PM GMT
    jjdayz saidI'm lazy that's why I'm not verified. lot's of the guys' on here are probably not interested in dealing with unverified people for the reasons u listed. I think as well, most gay men that are out prefer to be with other guys that are out. Its hard to go back in the closet for someone thats not 100% out. At least thats my opinion.


    I appreciate your response and this is mine to you.

    If/when I find the right guy and want to settle down then I won't care who knows I'm with him. I wouldn't expect anyone to live in the closet for me and would never ask that. I don't bring home every guy that I sleep with and that will never happen. When Mr. Right shows up then I will have no problem sharing with the world that he is my man! Plus, I won't be on sites like this anymore and hopefully there are not any guys on here that mess around behind their lovers backs!

    Thanks for the reply!
  • CSPYNY

    Posts: 187

    Jun 28, 2008 11:12 PM GMT
    Not verified because I'm lazy and not photogenic.

    I'm also not out and would not want to date someone that would want to out me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 28, 2008 11:20 PM GMT
    Pure laziness. If I make an effort and actually start chatting with someone here and it becomes an issue (that I'm not verified) then I might get off my lazy bum and do it icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 28, 2008 11:26 PM GMT
    Lazy. And what for? I could play video games instead.
  • MikePhilPerez

    Posts: 4357

    Jun 28, 2008 11:38 PM GMT
    Because I do not trust a verified profile over a unverified profile, so why would I expect anyone else to icon_question.gif

    BTW, it is laziness to expect a website to verify someone for you. If you have any interest in some one here, then get off your lazy ass and get to know them. That is the best, and only way to verify some one.

    Mike
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 28, 2008 11:44 PM GMT
    I despise having my picture taken...period. Besides, don't own a digital cam, scanner. Too much work to borrow someone else's.
  • inuman

    Posts: 733

    Jun 29, 2008 12:02 AM GMT
    Well I'm verified and I wasn't 100% out until I met my guy. When he and I started seeing each other he asked and I said not completely and he asked well who doesn't know? I said a few friends but my family knows and that's the important thing. He said true but what if you want me to meet them, how are you going to introduce us? I said well I'll tell them and if they freak out, so be it, it's their problem they can't deal with the fact that I'm gay and seeing a great guy.

    Well now everyone I know, knows I'm gay and seeing someone. No one freaked out, so I'm glad they didn't but if they had I wouldn't care less, the guy I'm with is more important to me in my life then my friends, friends come and go and so do lovers, or so it seems but I don't want this one to go. So I'm doing all I can to make sure he and I stay together. If that means loosing a few friends who couldn't deal with the fact that I'm gay, then oh well life happens, I'm not going to freak over it, I enjoyed their time as friends and if they choose not to be then so be it.

    My point is I agree that people should mind their own business and don't be so petty about outing other guys that aren't 100% out, it's their choice and there is likely circumstances around why they are not completely out. I've known a few guys that can't come out because of family or work, it's complicated and not as simple as some people put it.

    I'll talk with anyone who feels like talking, it don't matter if they are or not verified, it's totally their choice if they choose not to be. Some become unverified because they've had a rough time being verified.

    I don't know if anyone is here to meet up or not, I joined this site because it was a point I was trying to prove in class that not all gay men are after sex and that gay men don't have the best workout routines versus straight people.

    I think a lot of guys on here to an extent take this site seriously when it comes to meeting other guys, I don't think they take it as such as you described but then again that's just my 0.02¢ icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 12:54 AM GMT
    I look at it this way: when a guy is verified, it's just a little easier to be assured you're talking to who you think you're talking to.

    That said, I have my "buddies" here, guys I've built a rapport with either on the forums, emails, or the chat room. I know they're real and who they say they are. I couldn't tell you without looking which of them are verified and which aren't.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 1:00 AM GMT
    No real incentive to.
    Not that I am looking for something free. Just not something I need to do right now. Maybe later after I get used to this.
    Right now both photos I have are me. Not a face less body shot, but my whole body from my feet to the top of my head..
    Well me in the public and me and my dog in the private.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 1:48 AM GMT
    I was verified. Then I took my profile down. Put it back up but my digital cam is dead. When I get a new cam, I will verify.

    I never worry too much about whether someone is verified or not. Is that a big concern to guys? Maybe because I do not use this site to meet people in the flesh, more to chat with guys in other states and countries, and if they are using pics not theirs, it is not my biggest concern in life.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 2:04 AM GMT
    Triggerman saidI was verified. Then I took my profile down. Put it back up but my digital cam is dead. When I get a new cam, I will verify.

    I never worry too much about whether someone is verified or not. Is that a big concern to guys? Maybe because I do not use this site to meet people in the flesh, more to chat with guys in other states and countries, and if they are using pics not theirs, it is not my biggest concern in life.


    EXACTLY!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 2:24 AM GMT

    I love that the most popular excuse here is laziness. Yeah, that's a character trait you really want to broadcast.

    For those of you who are worried about people seeing them profiled on a gay site and outing them: NEWS FLASH: noone cares enough to search for your ass on the internet. Especially on a member's only site, to do that, they'd have to set up a profile of their own and search for pictures of guys who look like you. NOONE cares enough about who you are mussin the sheets with to do that.

    And even if they did, you could always say "Dude, you're profiled on a gay site?"icon_twisted.gif If they tell, you tell, that easy.

    P.S. If people are suspecting you enough to search for you on gay sites, they already know you're gay, moron. Noone wakes up and decides to search for a person's pic on a gay site. They need a reason.icon_exclaim.gif Bottom line, noone's doing this so chillax.





  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 2:37 AM GMT
    Triggerman saidI was verified. Then I took my profile down. Put it back up but my digital cam is dead.


    Hey, glad to see you again. You pose clear, logical and well-thought arguments. It was a bummer when I saw your post go Hidden/Deleted.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 2:54 AM GMT
    [quote][cite]GuiltyGear said[/cite]
    I love that the most popular excuse here is laziness. Yeah, that's a character trait you really want to broadcast

    Maybe laziness isnt the best word. How about this: I just can't be bothered todo it. I have more important things to do then worry about if I'm verified on a web site.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 4:38 AM GMT
    I'm with jjdayz here. Life really is too short to go through the rigmarole of getting verified. I have better things to do - like write responses to why I'm not verified. Much more important.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 5:31 AM GMT
    hey its easier to type a message then take a photo with a sheet and upload to my computer then load to site and such. Not as much work. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 5:57 AM GMT
    Thank you, Buckwheet-

    I try to be base my arguments and debates on reason and logic. Not always successful. Sometimes my emotion and passion get in the way. I think I did that in the past based on some of the harsh responses I got sent personally to me. I got tired of it, but later realized I would be better off answering in a public forum. Bring it on. I will still try my best to say what I feel without denigrating someone else's opinion. But I say what I think, let the chips fall where they may. If I am wrong, give me a better argument, not a personal attack. (personal attacks do not bother me but they don't get to the point. Anyone reading this, get to the point. Attack my position, not me. Otherwise, you diminish yourself).

    All the best....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 6:30 AM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    I love that the most popular excuse here is laziness. Yeah, that's a character trait you really want to broadcast.

    For those of you who are worried about people seeing them profiled on a gay site and outing them: NEWS FLASH: noone cares enough to search for your ass on the internet. Especially on a member's only site, to do that, they'd have to set up a profile of their own and search for pictures of guys who look like you. NOONE cares enough about who you are mussin the sheets with to do that.

    And even if they did, you could always say "Dude, you're profiled on a gay site?"icon_twisted.gif If they tell, you tell, that easy.

    P.S. If people are suspecting you enough to search for you on gay sites, they already know you're gay, moron. Noone wakes up and decides to search for a person's pic on a gay site. They need a reason.icon_exclaim.gif Bottom line, noone's doing this so chillax.






    Muhhahahahha

    Wonder why this guy is so bitter? Any guesses? I have one!

    News Flash? hahahah I have had a few guys try to figure out if I'm gay or not and I do know what they will go through to find out. Maybe this guy hasn't had that many people interested in him to go that far and I totally understand why!

    Thanks for the laugh though!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 7:44 AM GMT
    jjdayz saidMaybe laziness isnt the best word. How about this: I just can't be bothered todo it. I have more important things to do then worry about if I'm verified on a web site.


    Thinking on it, you're right. Saying I'm too lazy to do it leaves the impression that I would become verified if I wasn't lazy, which isn't true.

    Proper reason: I don't care. icon_razz.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 7:47 AM GMT
    They are not verified because they do not want to become a real jock!icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 7:52 AM GMT
    Quarko saidThey are not verified because they do not want to become a real jock!icon_biggrin.gif


    On a cascading scale of 1 to 10, how funny do you think you would look with my boot sticking out of your ass? icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 8:14 AM GMT
    Haven't bothered because I'm not looking for a hookup.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2008 9:50 AM GMT
    caesarea4 saidHaven't bothered because I'm not looking for a hookup.


    It's also required for hookups? Seems like an odd distinction between meeting in the public stall vs. paying to rent a towel at the bath house.

    Icky.