The Power Of Vulnerability

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 06, 2012 5:00 PM GMT
    Edit: a new video: Vulnerability is not weakness or shame.. it means courage, creativity, change (the original video is below)















    Extermely relevant for many of us icon_smile.gif












    http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html#.TzABTw7Voko.facebook
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    Feb 06, 2012 5:16 PM GMT
    oh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".
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    Feb 06, 2012 5:47 PM GMT
    SkinnyBitch saidoh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".


    Thats kind of missing the point lol. you must exercise patience icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 06, 2012 5:51 PM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    SkinnyBitch saidoh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".


    Thats kind of missing the point lol. you must exercise patience icon_smile.gif


    It's just that the same point could be made in much less time. I know what she's getting at long before she says it. And she words things in the cheesiest of ways. I'd rather watch someone else give the same presentation but with more finesse.
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    Feb 06, 2012 7:02 PM GMT
    There's an old saying, 'if you want to find out what someone is really like, give them power over you and watch what they do with it.'

    There's an additional benefit. When other people are around they also get to see what the person with power over you is really like as well.

    icon_wink.gif
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    Feb 06, 2012 7:04 PM GMT
    SkinnyBitch said
    GreenHopper said
    SkinnyBitch saidoh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".


    Thats kind of missing the point lol. you must exercise patience icon_smile.gif


    It's just that the same point could be made in much less time. I know what she's getting at long before she says it. And she words things in the cheesiest of ways. I'd rather watch someone else give the same presentation but with more finesse.


    But, you didnt get her point lol....
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    Feb 06, 2012 7:05 PM GMT
    meninlove said There's an old saying, 'if you want to find out what someone is really like, give them power over you and watch what they do with it.'

    There's an additional benefit. When other people are around they also get to see what the person with power over you is really like as well.

    icon_wink.gif


    hmm, interesting
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    Feb 06, 2012 7:07 PM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    meninlove said There's an old saying, 'if you want to find out what someone is really like, give them power over you and watch what they do with it.'

    There's an additional benefit. When other people are around they also get to see what the person with power over you is really like as well.

    icon_wink.gif


    hmm, interesting


    It is, and once told this, I began employing it with rather spectacular results.

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    Feb 06, 2012 7:11 PM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    SkinnyBitch said
    GreenHopper said
    SkinnyBitch saidoh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".


    Thats kind of missing the point lol. you must exercise patience icon_smile.gif


    It's just that the same point could be made in much less time. I know what she's getting at long before she says it. And she words things in the cheesiest of ways. I'd rather watch someone else give the same presentation but with more finesse.


    But, you didnt get her point lol....


    Of course I got her point.

    It's just that she doesn't realize
    0hhXb.gif
  • MW1987

    Posts: 10

    Feb 18, 2012 9:44 AM GMT
    Stunning, thanks for sharing.
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    Feb 18, 2012 12:21 PM GMT
    I watched the whole clip, and I'm glad you shared something so honest and introspective and beautiful. She spoke in a language of truths that we inherently know and understand, but find hard to follow. It's hard to be vulnerable b/c this world is so mean sometimes.
  • DanOmatic

    Posts: 1155

    Feb 18, 2012 1:08 PM GMT
    Thanks, Greenhopper, for sharing that. I really needed to be reminded of that.

    I recently allowed myself to be vulnerable in a big way, having opened my heart to a man whose words and actions led me to believe it was reciprocal and that there were prospects for the future--only to have him panic suddenly and slam the door shut on it, me, and any conversation about it.

    It's clear to me that he was ashamed of his vulnerability, whereas I was unafraid to show mine. Sure, after the fact those second-guessing thoughts crossed my mind that I should have played my cards closer to my vest to protect myself, but in this case I had no other choice but to go for it in a big way. Sometimes your heart doesn't leave you any choice in the matter, even if you're not given to wearing your heart on your sleeve.

    I don't regret it--to let yourself be vulnerable in love is a risk, but it reminds you that you are capable of great depth of emotion and that your heart is alive.

    It doesn't stop the fact that I'm hurt and disappointed, but I know I'm worthy of something great with the right guy when the time comes.
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    Feb 18, 2012 1:27 PM GMT
    this is such a power bottom video
  • calamedes

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    Feb 18, 2012 1:33 PM GMT
    I'm sure that this is a battle that alot of us deal with on a constant basis. Especially regarding coming out, we've all experienced points of extreme vulnerability and have overcome them.

    This is a fantastic video, which, after seeing, I've posted on my wall and have gotten lots of cool replies from it.
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    Feb 18, 2012 1:36 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    GreenHopper said
    meninlove said There's an old saying, 'if you want to find out what someone is really like, give them power over you and watch what they do with it.'

    There's an additional benefit. When other people are around they also get to see what the person with power over you is really like as well.

    icon_wink.gif


    hmm, interesting


    It is, and once told this, I began employing it with rather spectacular results.



    Said passive or aggressive?
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    Feb 18, 2012 1:39 PM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    SkinnyBitch saidoh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".


    Thats kind of missing the point lol. you must exercise patience icon_smile.gif


    One could say the one thing my pa was to teach me was to do just that; exercise patients. Oh and I can truly be a patient man!
  • calamedes

    Posts: 69

    Feb 18, 2012 1:42 PM GMT
    TrueBlueAussie said
    GreenHopper said
    SkinnyBitch saidoh god so queefy and long-winded... couldn't sit and listen for long... just didn't have the patience.

    But I do believe there is strength in showing vulnerabilty. Hiding the underbelly means you won't be able to handle it getting hurt. Showing it says "I can take whatever you got!".


    Thats kind of missing the point lol. you must exercise patience icon_smile.gif


    One could say the one thing my pa was to teach me was to do just that; exercise patients. Oh and I can truly be a patient man!


    Are you a Physical Therapist? Because only then should you exercise patients icon_razz.gif

    Patience, on the other hand, is for all of us icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 18, 2012 8:27 PM GMT
    I downloaded this session I while back from TED. It's very eye opening, though I do have some questions about her findings. But maybe that's up for me to figure out. Nevertheless, very informative, and she's funny! icon_cool.gif
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    Feb 18, 2012 8:42 PM GMT
    Thank you all for watching! I do think it is true that I cannot learn to trust if I do not make myself vulnerable.. by always being protective and defensive, you exercise mistrust at all times.. sometimes that is necessary, but I think its good to learn to let go of that at other times icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 18, 2012 9:33 PM GMT
    The downside to being vulnerable though is that being exposed to hurt frequently makes you jaded and afraid to take any more chances, which makes you feel inadequate, insecure. But I guess yuu have to learn and get past that to grow emotionally.
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    Feb 18, 2012 9:35 PM GMT
    GigoloAssassin said The downside to being vulnerable though is that being exposed to hurt frequently makes you jaded and afraid to take any more chances, which makes you feel inadequate, insecure. But I guess yuu have to learn and get past that to grow emotionally.


    Its like playing poker really.. every thing you do entails risk.. but you have to participate to win icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 18, 2012 9:42 PM GMT
    My fortune cookie for today :" The only people who really fail are those who never try"
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    Feb 18, 2012 9:44 PM GMT
    Thanks for posting this!
    I thought it was really smart.
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    Feb 18, 2012 9:46 PM GMT
    And to say to myself that "I am enough?" How can I say I'm enough when circumstances remind me that I'm not? If I say I'm enough, does that mean I stop improving, I stop progressing?
  • Ironman4U

    Posts: 738

    Feb 18, 2012 10:00 PM GMT
    LOVED the presentation and delivery, as well as the fact that she came at this from years of methodical research. Thanks so much for sharing!

    I've been on my own vulnerability journey the last few years. Not all the way there yet, but major steps with embracing my authenticity and being vulnerable. I have to say that I've never been happier and more balanced.

    I think as gay and bi men on this site, the message is extremely powerful and cries out for to ask us how we can live our own truth which obviously makes us vulnerable in the world. Think of the power and the change it would create, not only in your life, but in the lives of others. Think how living authentically changes everything.