Money/Power

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    Feb 14, 2012 4:41 AM GMT
    Me and my boyfriend got into a discussion today about the future. The subject of being financially successful came up. I told him I personally don't care if I end up living with my partner and he has a just-barely-getting-it-by job or not. I am a content person and I don't need the big life. He felt the complete opposite that a man can find more enjoyment out of life in success. Money and power to him were a turn on, for me I could care less. What do you think?
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    Feb 14, 2012 4:56 AM GMT
    It's all relative. I view money as a means to pay the bills, so that I can enjoy life a little more. Don't really care too much for the fancy lifestyle.
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    Feb 14, 2012 11:17 AM GMT
    I think you need a happy medium. I work a high pressure high paying job....but I don't feel any more powerful. I get more nervous the more raises I get that the bottom will fall out and I'm going to end up broke.

    I am def not turned on my someones money or their job title, however, I am turned off by someone who is 30 who does not have ambition, a job not a career, and who doesn't have a nice home.
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    Feb 14, 2012 11:33 AM GMT
    "Money and power to him were a turn on, for me I could care less. What do you think?"

    Hmmm...money and power as the goal in life or money and power to help achieve what you want out of life? The two are quite different I think.

    -Doug
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    Feb 14, 2012 5:37 PM GMT
    meninlove said "Money and power to him were a turn on, for me I could care less. What do you think?"

    Hmmm...money and power as the goal in life or money and power to help achieve what you want out of life? The two are quite different I think.

    -Doug

    Both honestly, he feels as he wouldn't be satisfied with not having the "big life"
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    Feb 14, 2012 5:42 PM GMT
    Money and power aren't really that important to me, except that it's gonna take MUCH more money than I currently have to accomplish some of the goals I've set.
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    Feb 14, 2012 5:44 PM GMT
    I don't think you have to think the same way as your boyfriend but you do have to respect each others viewpoint. If he wants a "big life" and you don't, you're going to have to work out how you'll fit into his "big life" while he fits into your more subdued one.

    The example that comes to mind is Dolly Parton. If I'm not mistaken, and I often am, she's been married to the same guy forever and he has no interest in fame/fortune. He does his own thing and she does hers, but they make it work together.
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    Feb 14, 2012 5:51 PM GMT
    It's not that I don't want the power/money its just something I don't feel like I have to have.
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    Feb 14, 2012 5:57 PM GMT
    I've been looking for someone to struggle through this life with for years. A lot of guys think they got it, til someone with more money, status and toys comes by to take them away. I think I may really stupid for not having focused on making more money sooner; but I still hope someone can hang with me until I get there.
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    Feb 14, 2012 5:59 PM GMT
    You two are doomed.

    Enjoy it while it lasts.
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    Feb 14, 2012 6:23 PM GMT
    hmmm, 1 of my friends aked me, "if ur not happy when ur poor, what makes u think u'll be happy when ur rich?"
  • seelsa73

    Posts: 19

    Feb 14, 2012 6:28 PM GMT
    Money and power, for me, isn't the appeal. If i only had money to pay off my student loans and then have that money from then on to spend towards better things. That's the appeal of the money...to hell with power.
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    Feb 14, 2012 6:31 PM GMT
    I developed my ideal lifestyle as a broke student, so it was nice to realize that I don't need a lot of money to have a full life of things I love doing. What matters more to me is location and accessibility to activities that give me a richer life experience. I think money as a goal is tasteless, and it never bought anyone class. Just being financially secure, stable housing and being able to eat whatever I wanted and buy the odd trinket is the icing on the cake. Now, about finding that dependable employment...
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    Feb 14, 2012 6:33 PM GMT
    I think ambition is important for me to have. Ideally I'd love it if my partner was just as ambitious, but recently I've realized I really don't care.

    I've been working 14 hour days and weekends and he has been supportive and amazing. I can go to him with my problems not intending to get them resolved and he feels no need to try to top my problems with his own (my ex did that a lot). He doesn't judge me, but will speak up if I'm out of line.

    He's happy that I have the power in terms of my professional life. He doesn't know but he has a lot of control over me in making decisions for the both of us. It's not like we planned for it, it just happened to end up that way. I'm exhausted making decisions at work and so having him decide things for me is a blessing.

    With my job, I need a lot of support. Having him support me makes me happy and makes me work harder.
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    Feb 14, 2012 6:52 PM GMT
    tailgater_3 saidhmmm, 1 of my friends aked me, "if ur not happy when ur poor, what makes u think u'll be happy when ur rich?"
    Because money can help dull the unhappiness. icon_razz.gif

    Who was it that said, "I've been poor and I've been rich. Rich is much better".

    While money doesn't necessarily by happiness, it certainly can make life easier to deal with in a lot of ways. Being financially insecure is one of the most stressful, depressing parts of life.

    I'm at that point right now, and don't really have many options to achieve financial success. So while being rich doesn't guarantee a great life, it can help mitigate a bad one.
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    Feb 14, 2012 6:52 PM GMT
    I always felt like each needed to bring self-sustenance to the table. If one only made enough to pay his half of rent, bills, food, then that would be enough. He just shouldn't be expecting a lot of the major purchases to be for him.

    Of course other things come into play, like doing the cleaning, laundry, food prep, organization, child/pet rearing etc, which is like a job itself.

    A bazillionarie + a poor guy would have power issues 9/10 times.

    I don't understand when guys say they REQUIRE a guy with ambition. I always kind of found ambition to be a flaw, like a mix of needing to feel important and never being content. Maybe I just don't understand it.
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    Feb 14, 2012 6:56 PM GMT
    Once you place the acquisition of assets and/or power as the requirement of a happy life, not only will you never be truly happy, you will also never be satisfied. The very few who have happiness with wealth and/or power are usually the ones who were born with it (not to imply that it is a guarantee for many in this realm are also miserable). The ones who achieve it from scratch, never stop to smell the roses.

    While you can dress it up in any number of elegant, beautiful or merely deceptive ways, it is simply greed. As soon as you acquire the money or power you desire, it will make you happy for a few seconds before you suddenly realize you want or 'need' more.

    Love of another man will not satisfy this need, and that love will be cast aside whether slow thoughtlessness or with sudden great force. The important note is that it will be cast aside.

    Having seen and experienced these things, without question, I would choose happy in poverty over misery in great wealth.

    So if that's what turns your partner on, you will never really be number one in his life, at best you can become a great trophy if that is your desire.

    He may stray from that notion, but if he doesn't within a few months, 6 months at most, then he's never going to change. At least not in a time frame that will allow you a happy life.
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    Feb 14, 2012 7:18 PM GMT
    [quote]
    I don't understand when guys say they REQUIRE a guy with ambition. I always kind of found ambition to be a flaw, like a mix of needing to feel important and never being content. Maybe I just don't understand it.[/quote]

    I think its all in the context. I think ambition is very sexy...but ambition can be applied to things greater than wealth and "power". Those I don't find attractive.
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    Feb 14, 2012 7:43 PM GMT
    tailgater_3 saidhmmm, 1 of my friends aked me, "if ur not happy when ur poor, what makes u think u'll be happy when ur rich?"
    Ask him if he's ever had to struggle to eat, much less pay bills.

    I have.

    Whoever coined the term "money doesn't buy happiness" never lived in a society where lack of money can kill you.
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    Feb 14, 2012 7:49 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    tailgater_3 saidhmmm, 1 of my friends aked me, "if ur not happy when ur poor, what makes u think u'll be happy when ur rich?"
    Ask him if he's ever had to struggle to eat, much less pay bills.

    I have.

    Whoever coined the term "money doesn't buy happiness" never lived in a society where lack of money can kill you.


    Tell me about it. I used to hate when I would be watching Oprah and she's like, "oh no way, trust me money doesn't buy happiness". I mean come on, we know that. But buying kraft dinner sure does make me unhappy. or did when I had to years ago lol.
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    Feb 14, 2012 8:13 PM GMT
    Money and power.. I feel like it's the 80's up in here. Where's my Porsche and gram of coke? icon_lol.gif
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    Feb 14, 2012 9:31 PM GMT
    uoft23 said
    paulflexes said
    tailgater_3 saidhmmm, 1 of my friends aked me, "if ur not happy when ur poor, what makes u think u'll be happy when ur rich?"
    Ask him if he's ever had to struggle to eat, much less pay bills.

    I have.

    Whoever coined the term "money doesn't buy happiness" never lived in a society where lack of money can kill you.


    Tell me about it. I used to hate when I would be watching Oprah and she's like, "oh no way, trust me money doesn't buy happiness". I mean come on, we know that. But buying kraft dinner sure does make me unhappy. or did when I had to years ago lol.


    I feel much happier when my belly's full. With money you can buy prepared food. Poor people have to make it themselves icon_sad.gif
  • jgymnast733

    Posts: 1783

    Feb 14, 2012 9:34 PM GMT
    Love can move moutains..........
    It really doesnt matter to me if my partner is rich or poor, if he's a good desent person I'M HAPPY.........
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    Feb 14, 2012 9:47 PM GMT
    Fiyero27 said
    tailgater_3 saidhmmm, 1 of my friends aked me, "if ur not happy when ur poor, what makes u think u'll be happy when ur rich?"
    Because money can help dull the unhappiness. icon_razz.gif
    Who was it that said, "I've been poor and I've been rich. Rich is much better".
    While money doesn't necessarily by happiness, it certainly can make life easier to deal with in a lot of ways. Being financially insecure is one of the most stressful, depressing parts of life.
    I'm at that point right now, and don't really have many options to achieve financial success. So while being rich doesn't guarantee a great life, it can help mitigate a bad one
    .

    Yes! It's funny how people react to money. We all crave of that oh so elusive humble pie; but when we got money we put it to use! I'm sure everyone here has fantasized about what they'd do with Lottery Winnings when they're at their highest? I'm just tired of living like a vagabond unable to start a career cause I'm always on the move. I'm going to focus on making the best of what I got and am focusing on saving my money, turning it around into more capital, and still come home to cook for would be boyfriend when I find him.
    It's easy to demonize people we don't know with a lot of money, but as we can see from our favorite celebrities; they're not all miserable. And who is stupid enough to assume money itself is sole source of happiness after having their first job? Losing money before you make it is enough reason to know better.
  • kolkii

    Posts: 147

    Feb 14, 2012 10:40 PM GMT
    op you're 21.. are you in school?