Question for you New Yorkers...

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    Feb 22, 2012 9:54 PM GMT
    Ok so this past weekend I was supposed to go to NYC but had a lot of crap to do and couldn't. So I am going home this weekend because my friend's (who is an au pair) boyfriend is visiting from Latvia and we want to spend the day in the city together.

    We plan to spend this saturday in NYC but at night, I am sure they want to go clubbing/straight bars and obviously...I want want to play the third wheel at a straight club and I obviously wouldn't drag them to a gay bar/club.

    So...should I go to a gay bar/club by myself? I've always had someone with me and don't know how to feel about going by myself.

    So my question for you single New Yorkers, do you go out by yourself?
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    Feb 22, 2012 10:37 PM GMT
    AlexanderB saidOk so this past weekend I was supposed to go to NYC but had a lot of crap to do and couldn't. So I am going home this weekend because my friend's (who is an au pair) boyfriend is visiting from Latvia and we want to spend the day in the city together.

    We plan to spend this saturday in NYC but at night, I am sure they want to go clubbing/straight bars and obviously...I want want to play the third wheel at a straight club and I obviously wouldn't drag them to a gay bar/club.

    So...should I go to a gay bar/club by myself? I've always had someone with me and don't know how to feel about going by myself.

    So my question for you single New Yorkers, do you go out by yourself?


    haha I'm not a New Yorker but a New Jerseyan which is close enough I guess icon_lol.gif I used to go to the city almost every other day. You should be extra careful doing ANYTHING by yourself in New York...it is always best to stay with at least one other person especially at night. But I've also seen several people get robbed/assaulted in broad daylight on Canal street but that could honestly happen anywhere I guess...you just have to be really confident and whatever you do...DON'T LOOK LOST! hahahaha icon_lol.gif
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    Feb 22, 2012 10:50 PM GMT
    Actually.....................

    New York is the safest big city in America. It's safe to walk alone, as long as you keep your wits about you, pretty much any time of day or night. icon_rolleyes.gif

    In any case, I gather you were wondering more in terms of socializing... Most places are kinda clickish, and most people do go out in groups, but it's fine to go out by yourself. Just get yourself a drink, and have a good time.
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:01 PM GMT
    19c79 saidActually.....................

    New York is the safest big city in America. It's safe to walk alone, as long as you keep your wits about you, pretty much any time of day or night. icon_rolleyes.gif

    In any case, I gather you were wondering more in terms of socializing... Most places are kinda clickish, and most people do go out in groups, but it's fine to go out by yourself. Just get yourself a drink, and have a good time.


    icon_rolleyes.gif figures...a New Yorker would say that.....lol icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif jkjk but all jokes aside to the op, you really just have to use common sense more than anything. Don't do anything stupid icon_biggrin.gif Have fun!!!!
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:02 PM GMT
    BlackCat90 said
    But I've also seen several people get robbed/assaulted in broad daylight on Canal street but that could honestly happen anywhere I guess...you just have to be really confident and whatever you do...DON'T LOOK LOST! hahahaha icon_lol.gif


    If it weren't for soup dumplings, I would avoid that area entirely - so many tourists, so crowded. /shiver

    It's fine to go out by yourself in NYC if you're the kind of person who likes going out by yourself. For me personally, I find it easier to go out alone if there's some sort of activity that I will enjoy. I went to Big Apple Ranch for the first time last weekend, because I like the country music dancing and that crowd is known for being friendly and approachable. I've stayed late at Marie's Crisis a number of times because I can sit at the piano and sing along all night (don't judge me!). On the other hand, I hate going to places like Boxers even with friends, but especially despise going alone. There's nothing to do there except stand around and drink (the pool table is usually covered up), and like 19c79 said, guys can be pretty cliquish.

    There are so many places to go though... what would you enjoy doing on your own?
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:13 PM GMT
    well only gay clubs in the city i've been to were Urge (which was a blast) in NYC and Rush when I was 19 (now Heaven...horrible place)...and two gay bars I've been to are Industrial and Therapy.

    I would love to go to a bar by myself but a part of me is scared that I am just going to be drinking by myself and not meet anyone lol. If i go to a club I would probably do bad things and go home with someone >_>...which i wouldn't be opposed to...
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:16 PM GMT
    AlexanderB saidSo...should I go to a gay bar/club by myself?
    Uh...fuck yeah!

    I go out by myself more often than with someone else. It's damn near impossible to get laid when you're with someone else.
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:31 PM GMT
    citpolo saidIf it weren't for soup dumplings, I would avoid that area entirely - so many tourists, so crowded. /shiver

    Preach. Plus, the smell. I helped my friends bury their cat yesterday. We found its body two weeks after it died. The smell reminded me of Canal Street in July.
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:37 PM GMT
    AlexanderB saidwell only gay clubs in the city i've been to were Urge (which was a blast) in NYC and Rush when I was 19 (now Heaven...horrible place)...and two gay bars I've been to are Industrial and Therapy.

    I would love to go to a bar by myself but a part of me is scared that I am just going to be drinking by myself and not meet anyone lol. If i go to a club I would probably do bad things and go home with someone >_>...which i wouldn't be opposed to...

    I'd say go, and if you don't meet anyone just move on to a club and go find someone to do bad things with. ;-)
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    Feb 22, 2012 11:46 PM GMT
    I was in this situation a few weeks ago! I went to the city alone..first time traveling alone and wanted to take advantage of it! I really wanted to hit up a gay bar before leaving but I felt a little nervous to go alone(had friends always advise to never go to a gay bar alone ANYWHERE, not just nyc).

    I ended up siding for a random irish bar in Manhattan that appeared gay friendly hahah if you find any good gay bars down in the city let me know!! lol cheers
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    Feb 23, 2012 12:42 AM GMT
    I did when I was single.But it was not my fave thing.Plus you always feel a bit safer when you are with someone.Loved hitting the Eagle though icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 23, 2012 12:44 AM GMT
    Dude, just go out to the straight club. There's nothing wrong with dancing with girls and having a great time with straight people. Your friends will be glad you came. I doubt they'd see you as a third wheel.
  • a303guy

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    Feb 23, 2012 12:58 AM GMT
    huhwhat saidDude, just go out to the straight club. There's nothing wrong with dancing with girls and having a great time with straight people. Your friends will be glad you came. I doubt they'd see you as a third wheel.


    I kinda have to agree with this - as much as I enjoy going to gay clubs in the city, New York's straight clubs (at least the ones I've experienced) seem to be either gay tolerant or gay friendly. I think you'll be fine with your friends.
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    Feb 23, 2012 1:19 AM GMT
    huhwhat saidDude, just go out to the straight club. There's nothing wrong with dancing with girls and having a great time with straight people. Your friends will be glad you came. I doubt they'd see you as a third wheel.


    I pretty much do that here at UCONN every weekend...lol
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    Feb 23, 2012 1:24 AM GMT
    AlexanderB said
    huhwhat saidDude, just go out to the straight club. There's nothing wrong with dancing with girls and having a great time with straight people. Your friends will be glad you came. I doubt they'd see you as a third wheel.


    I pretty much do that here at UCONN every weekend...lol


    Then you know gay people go to straight clubs too. You never know who you'll meet no matter where you go. Drag your friends to a gay club. The music is better anyway. I just hate going to a club alone. It's just not natural. There's a 'pack' mentality sometimes, and you need a pack to belong to - otherwise, you're the creepy guy. I don't care how hot you are.
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    Feb 23, 2012 3:18 AM GMT
    19c79 said
    citpolo saidIf it weren't for soup dumplings, I would avoid that area entirely - so many tourists, so crowded. /shiver

    Preach. Plus, the smell. I helped my friends bury their cat yesterday. We found its body two weeks after it died. The smell reminded me of Canal Street in July.


    I get off at Canal st everyday to get to work :/

    I've never gone out alone. And in the times that I've had to wait for friends at bars (since I'm ALWAYS the only one on time), I feel awkward being there by myself. Having said that, that's just me. We've had strangers who wanted to hang with our group join us a number of times and we all had a good time.

    One thing though.. It sounds like you rarely get to see these friends of yours. If you're just gonna be spending a day with these guys, wouldn't you want to maximize your time with them and go out clubbing with them too? At least you're guaranteed to have fun with them whereas you may or may not at the gay club. Unless you're looking to get laid of course.
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    Feb 23, 2012 3:28 AM GMT
    I'm in the City every Sunday too and I've had the same issue. Have wanted to go to Boxers Sports Bar or G Lounge, but can't get up the nerve to go by myself especially on a Sunday evening.

    But if you're more outgoing than me, give it a shot and see how it goes. Let me know if it isn't as bad as we think it is. icon_wink.gif
  • lookinsingle

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    Feb 23, 2012 3:33 AM GMT
    I'm in Jersey but if I were feeling adventurous I'd go into NYC alone... I just keep money in my shoe in case I wander into a bad area accidentally and get mugged or run into an emergency. I have bad luck and a tendency of getting lost haha but for the most part if you act like you belong you'll be just fine. Sometimes heading out alone and meeting people along the way turns out to be more fun than staying with friends. Just make sure you have a definite plan and backup plan on getting home.
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    Feb 23, 2012 3:44 AM GMT
    AlexanderB saidOk so this past weekend I was supposed to go to NYC but had a lot of crap to do and couldn't. So I am going home this weekend because my friend's (who is an au pair) boyfriend is visiting from Latvia and we want to spend the day in the city together.

    We plan to spend this saturday in NYC but at night, I am sure they want to go clubbing/straight bars and obviously...I want want to play the third wheel at a straight club and I obviously wouldn't drag them to a gay bar/club.

    So...should I go to a gay bar/club by myself? I've always had someone with me and don't know how to feel about going by myself.

    So my question for you single New Yorkers, do you go out by yourself?


    I haven't lived in NYC for a few years

    You don't look Chelsea-Splash. (You're too stylish with the black leather. Not that you'd wear that every time you go out. Anyway, you should like Splash for 30 minutes or so. I would go as early as after work. On a weekend, I think a 9:30p - 11p time frame would be cool. You'd probably see cool music videos and maybe a shower performance or some other excellent go-go boy performance.)

    You kind of look East Village (10 years ago?)

    You wouldn't be out of place in Soho. I don't know of any gay bars in Soho.

    As for the Village/Christopher Street, I think the Monster is bar where people are approachable or more approachable. That has been my experience.

    I used to go to The Works on Columbus across from the back of the American Museum of Natural History; but, it closed. I doubt if there's a gay bar there in its place. Anyway, without the gay bar, to walk around the Museum of Natural History at night, definitely not missing the north side where the Planetarium is would be worthwhile. The Planetarium at night is as nice to behold as the Empire State Building at night.
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    Feb 23, 2012 3:46 AM GMT
    Watch how much you drink - since you won't have anyone to back you up you have to be sober enough to look after yourself.

    But YEAH - going out alone can be a blast!!!! You have no one to answer to, don't have to worry whether or not anyone else is having a good enough time and if you feel like making a fast exit - you don't have to gather up your entourage. You make your own rules as you go along - and there is no confusion as to whether or not the guy you are walking in with is your BF. It can actually make meeting new people easier!

    When I was single I went out solo all the time -- it is how I met my BF!!!

    Go for it!!!!!

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
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    Feb 23, 2012 4:01 AM GMT
    sixty_six said
    19c79 said
    citpolo saidIf it weren't for soup dumplings, I would avoid that area entirely - so many tourists, so crowded. /shiver
    Preach. Plus, the smell. I helped my friends bury their cat yesterday. We found its body two weeks after it died. The smell reminded me of Canal Street in July.
    I get off at Canal st everyday to get to work :/

    I got off at Canal everyday for work for a couple of years... I feel your pain.

    Anyway, back to Alex... If you decide to fly solo, try the Boiler Room, on 4th btwn 1st and 2nd (not too far from Urge). Some here will think I'm crazy for suggesting this, but they probably haven't been there in the last 10 years. It's one of the most laid back and fun bars in the city, and the crowd is pretty mixed in terms of age. They have a jukebox and trivia machines, which make for good spots to kill time while you work up the nerve to go talk to someone. No one will bat an eye about you coming there by yourself. And, hey, wherever you go, you just have to be confident, and like Cash said, be happy that you're going by your own rules. There's nothing creepy about it. It's only creepy if you sulk in a corner and stare.
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    Feb 23, 2012 4:12 AM GMT
    Fiyero27 saidI'm in the City every Sunday too and I've had the same issue. Have wanted to go to Boxers Sports Bar or G Lounge, but can't get up the nerve to go by myself especially on a Sunday evening.

    But if you're more outgoing than me, give it a shot and see how it goes. Let me know if it isn't as bad as we think it is. icon_wink.gif

    Try Nowhere on Sunday. It's on 14th, btwn 1st and 2nd, on the south side of the street. Similar to Boiler Room, which I mentioned above, it's a pretty laid back atmosphere.