I took the HIV test this morning..

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    Jul 03, 2008 7:45 PM GMT


    and I have to wait 10 days for the results ..
    it's kinda scary.. I don't know what will be my reaction when I see the results .. it may be "I knew it" if it's + ...

    Let's hope for good ..
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:12 PM GMT
    Hey Buddy, Good luck! Either way you did the right thing! Let us know how you make out. If you need to talk feel free to send an E-mail.
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:13 PM GMT
    Best of luck.
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:14 PM GMT
    try the oral swab test. results in like 20 minutes or less.

    it is scary though. best of luck
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:15 PM GMT
    Why do you think it is positive? Regardless of the results you will make it. HIV test are always scary. But you will get through it.
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:16 PM GMT
    Good luck man!!!
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:21 PM GMT
    THX for all of u guys .. I'm glad to feel your support ..

    last few days I was really sick and start thinking about death seriously, it felt kinda strange to be ok with the idea..it's just my body is really weak lately..
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:24 PM GMT
    I am sure you will be fine, but I can empathize with your anxiety. Funny thing is when I was tested in 1995 due to a serious illness, I was not expecting a + test. It can back + and all I can remember is everything got very quiet, and I heard this roaring noise in my head. Shock maybe?

    We will cross our fingers for you GhostA.
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:27 PM GMT
    I hate taking that test even though I know I'm monogamous in my relationship and when I was safe in the past. There's always a slight chance it could be +. Sending some good energy your way!
  • swimbikerun

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    Jul 03, 2008 8:28 PM GMT
    Don't panic! even if you are poz, things are different now than they used to be. For one, you will most likely live.
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:46 PM GMT
    last week, my boyfriend requested me to go with him to the hospital to visit his friend who has aids ...

    the last time i saw my boyfriend's friend was like, 3 weeks ago ...

    but when i saw the "friend" in the hospital, i was shocked ... and i felt very uncomfortable ...

    because that was the first time i saw someone who ... who used to look healthy ... then suddenly became very skinny ... in a very short period of time ...

    the "friend" was like skin and bones ...

    my boyfriend told me that his friend did not take care of himself like, taking aids medications or whatever ...

    anyway, forgive me if im kind of innocent when it comes to aids reality ... but that was the first time i saw someone with aids ...

    it is very scary ...

    now i know what it's like when someone has aids ...

    i just wish that there will be a miracle or a cure someday ...
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    Jul 03, 2008 8:51 PM GMT
    You are lucky diNgDonG to not have experienced this by now. It was a common occurence for me between 1986 and 1996. You would be playing sports with a guy, he would disappear for awhile, and the next time you saw him he would be walking like an old man. Then six months later he would be gone.

    I don't think I will ever get used to it.
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    Jul 03, 2008 9:11 PM GMT
    JBE60 saidYou are lucky diNgDonG to not have experienced this by now. It was a common occurence for me between 1986 and 1996. You would be playing sports with a guy, he would disappear for awhile, and the next time you saw him he would be walking like an old man. Then six months later he would be gone.

    I don't think I will ever get used to it.



    yea, thats what my boyfriend told me ... a person with hiv today will live longer ... and will live like a normal life ... because of the availability of hiv/aids medication ...

    my boyfriend knows a lot about hiv/aids ... he's hiv negative ... and i am hiv negative also ...

    but my boyfriend's former partner had aids ... he died in 1993 because of aids ... so my boyfriend knows how and what it's like when someone has aids ... specially when that someone is your partner ... the person that he loved so dearly to the day he died ...

    when my boyfriend met his former partner, the former partner had aids already ... but my boyfriend did not leave him ... my boyfriend fell in love with him ... and stayed with him ... until the day the former partner died ...

    i guess thats what we call "the power of love" ...

    when you fall in love ... all you feel is that ... i dont care who you are ... i dont care where you're from ... all i know is i am in love with you ... and love is all i can give to you ...

    thats what i like between me and my boyfriend ... we are in love ...
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    Jul 03, 2008 9:13 PM GMT
    I really like the new 20 minute tests and have been getting them free at the health center here for the past few years. I don't usually worry about the results unless there has been an "accident" that would put me at a higher risk.

    Looking at the "worst" case, I see some of the great guys in my life and on this site who are positive, and feel a sense of support in case the result comes back positive.

    It is just like dealing with any other unwanted situation in life, the anticipation of calamity can be worse than the calamity itself.
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    Jul 03, 2008 9:27 PM GMT
    Gosh not an issue in my life really. I already know the result. But all the best.

    But funny how things change. When the gay plague first hit the media I was working for the gay community in a bathhouse; I seen and did it all, and so many of em too. The joys of being young. But so many of em never made it to middle age like I.

    I even had a full on sexual relationship with a guy whom forgot to inform One he's status was not the same as mine. Yet he had no conscience about going unprotected; I had a test back then. Yet my status is still the same I don't need a a blood test, my status is the same; I don't play the game.

    Life is full of changes anyways. You just have too live long enough, good luck.
  • zakariahzol

    Posts: 2241

    Jul 03, 2008 9:31 PM GMT
    I have take all kinda blood test except for HIV. I dont think I am emotionally prepare for the possibility that I could be POS. But the last time I do barebacking (topping) was like 20 years ago, I dont give any more condomless bj for about 1 years (I admint I sometimes still receive bj condomless). I been practicing safe sex with condom every time I bottom. The last time I was penetrated condomless is when I was 19 (I am 42 now). My last blood test show I have normal white blood cell and normal immune system. So even though there possibility , I guess it not likely.
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    Jul 03, 2008 9:34 PM GMT
    hoping for you; and in spirit i be with you:good luckicon_exclaim.gif
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    Jul 03, 2008 9:36 PM GMT
    Ghosta good luck! Trust me I know how you feel. When I had my test I was on pins and needles for days and days. And trust me when I first moved to NYC I was kinda runnin' wild....it was the mid 80's. Luckily I was negative and had a HUGE sigh of relief. You'll prob be fine. Just stay occupied till the results come back. If y're neg reaffirm you determination to stay that way and if y'r poz then get the right medical help right away. It's not a death sentence anymore. Hugs!
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    Jul 03, 2008 9:36 PM GMT
    I'm crossin my fingers for you.
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    Jul 03, 2008 10:07 PM GMT
    All the best to you whatever the outcome. You will probably be fine, but just to let you know there is life after a HIV+ result. And sharing your situation will hopefully make some others here think about risky behavior. Thanks! I got tested just by chance 11 years ago and I am only writing here because I did and found out.

    A friend just asked me to visit her friend in the hospital. I met him yesterday. He was admitted with severe pneumonia and found out that he was HIV+. His CD4 count is 8 (less than 200 defines AIDS!), but he will recover and is now on medication that, trust me, works as advertised but sometimes with side effects. He now "thinks"he may have been infected in 2000. I know that is is scary to get tested, but you did the right thing. Good luck and drop me a note either way. I can also answer questions for you or anyone anytime.
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    Jul 03, 2008 10:13 PM GMT
    THX again ..
    I know I'm not in a big risk as I started having sex only 7 months ago and always safe ... but bad luck can persuite anybody ..
    I hope my fears are just fears and I'd get back to health very soon so I can trust my body again and my immune system..
    and thx for the support ..I try to stay optimistic although it's not me ...
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    Jul 03, 2008 10:15 PM GMT
    Good luck. I know the feeling of waiting for the results. If it is positive, it isn't the end of the world and it's a good thing you find out now. But, it could be non-reactive. You did the right thing, way to go. More people should step up to the plate like you did.

  • swimbikerun

    Posts: 2835

    Jul 03, 2008 10:37 PM GMT
    John43620 saidGood luck. I know the feeling of waiting for the results. If it is positive, it isn't the end of the world and it's a good thing you find out now. But, it could be non-reactive. You did the right thing, way to go. More people should step up to the plate like you did.


    Ummm...this is the first posting from you I've ever agreed with! lol
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    Jul 04, 2008 12:09 AM GMT
    In some parts of the county, like here, a nasty summer flu has reach epidemic proportions so don't sweat it. Next time get the HIV 20 min 99 % accurate mouth swab test at a health clinic and then a full STD panel for other stuff.
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    Jul 04, 2008 4:07 AM GMT
    Best of luck.

    I knew a guy that thought that's what it was everytime he felt weak or sick. If you're looking for symptoms, you're going to start making them up. I'm sure there are guys here who know way more about psychology than me and can explain that stuff better. But, for what my advice is worth, follow the advice that's been posted here, and think good thoughts. Especially during a period like waiting for test results, the best thing you can do for yourself is hope for the best, be prepared for anything.

    I had my last test about a month ago, and it never gets to feel routine.