Unfortunately its occurring in epidemic proportions. In large part due to the stigmatization of same sex couples by society it largely goes unreported and when it does it is not treated with nearly the same seriousness as domestic violence within heterosexual couples. There are a number of psychological and social factors that make this a difficult situation. One police are less likely to intervene or take it seriously if reported. In the event of a male couple the police tend to view it one of a few ways; its just a couple guys settling a dispute, its just another faggot lovers quarrel, or the homo deserves what he gets. Please don't take that offensively, I don't agree with any of those, but that is the unfortunate fact of the response by law enforcement. In the event that it is reported by a female couple the view is oh its just another cat fight, or they deserve what they get for being that way. Disgusting as it is, the views among law enforcement prevent the enforcement of domestic violence laws among homosexual couples. Further, fearing the publicity and stigma attached to homosexual relationships many gays are reluctant to report it. Many communities have police logs that are printed in the paper and online, and many gays fear that others might find out and therefore are reluctant to report the abuse.
There seems especially to be a significant problem with this among males. The view seems to be that if I was man enough I should be able to defend myself, and the reason this happened is that I wasn't man enough to stop it. As sad as that is I personally have heard that from a friend in this very situation. The very comment made me angry hearing it, because violence never establishes manliness, in fact I believe it indicates everything but manliness, a real man has enough control of himself that violence is never an option. Unfortunately there is great shame and self-loathing in individuals stuck in these relationships, because if they really had any self worth at all they would not tolerate the abuse and would leave the S.O.B doing this. There is also great fear of retribution or harassment for reporting it. For a simple example, an abused lover calls the cops for domestic violence, and now the cops follow them constantly, if they drive two miles an hour over the speed limit they are pulled over for speeding. A report to law enforcement of homosexual domestic abuse is often times followed by what should be considered police harassment. Yes in the 21st century this still happens and is a significant concern and impediment to reporting the crime.
It's also very rarely noticed among support professionals. Hospital staff, social workers, teachers, law enforcement, domestic violence staff, etc. are all trained to recognize the signs and symptoms of child abuse, spouse abuse, domestic violence but that training is rarely if ever delivered in the context of homosexual relationships and therefore it goes unnoticed and underreported.
Because of all the issues that come with acceptance of homosexuality and the trouble that many people have in coming to terms with this there are numerous issues that are unique to the gay population and these factors complicate this issue. For example, it's well established that there is a disturbing link between teen homosexuality and depression and suicide attempts. When someone is struggling with fundamental identity issues and depression, it seriously complicates the issue of domestic violence, whether it be emotional or physical violence. Number one, they lack the normal social support network. If a female in a heterosexual relationship is abused, she is likely to have friends, family, sisters, trusted people like counselors, pastors, youth group leaders, teachers, etc. that she can turn to and trust. Unfortunately, that kind of social support is severely lacking for homosexual people and often times even if it does exist the person in that situation already has trust, identity and self esteem issues that prevent them from using the social resources available. Further, because of the more limited choice in available partners, often times especially young gay people are reluctant to end a violent relationship because they seem to think that having someone, even if they are violent is better then having no one. Many of them also fear being cast out of the social circle if they say anything about the abuse. There are a huge number of factors that complicate the recognition and reporting of abusive relationships within the homosexual population and until there is a sufficient focus on public education regarding this issue it is not likely to get better.