I am attracted to you Miss, and you too Sir

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2008 2:55 PM GMT
    I have noticed that the whole bisexuality “thing” is a big conflict amongst everyone. And I am not going to lie, I once thought that maybe people were just lying to themselves until they were ready to take on homosexualityicon_redface.gif, but now, with this thing that I am writing here, I hope that maybe I or maybe someone else can convince me and others that bisexuality is probable.

    — Attraction
    Do our eyes look at what attracts us, or what we have been taught to think attractive? Under the influence of a straight father or any other straight human teaching an unknowing homosexual/bisexual what to think attractive, do we follow our instincts or what we have been taught when our eyes wander? (I am not saying that father’s teach their sons what is beautiful, but it is not like you have seen your father or any other male whistle at a guy jogging along the street, or maybe you have.)

    Why do I look up skirts to find pink underwear or why do I look down guys shorts at the gym? Am I attracted to both?(or do I just like underwear?:lolicon_smile.gif Or am I just fixated on the idea that men are “supposed” to, as I was taught, to be attracted to women. Do I look at women merely because I was taught to stare at them in a certain way, or am I just attracted to both? Thus the whole “bisexual” tangent emerges while I try to define a penis from inside some guy’s running shorts at the gym, and pray that it is not a phone or some strange rod-like object, while in the next room boobs bounce to a really good dance song in the next room.

    — Another digression
    Why is it that when a guy looks at women in a cunning way, he is perverted, but when a guy looks at a guy, it is okay? Is there any hatred or disgust towards the men’s eye for man like there is for that of women?— Or am I just some misinformed “greedy eye-candy hoarder slut” that has been “blessed/damned” to enjoy(pleasurably) all humans. And maybe that is bisexuality...sigh*. icon_confused.gif




    ---
    If you read this, thank you.
    ---

    The kid, Mickey
  • ROYCE13

    Posts: 315

    Jul 07, 2008 5:40 PM GMT
    Bisexuality- I really do not like the term or any of the labels, but they are here.
    I do not believe that we are really taught what to like regarding men and women.
    Even if one has been "taught" tutored or what ever you want to call it, your natural
    feelings and desires over ride the taught behaviors when and if they surface. I believe if we are all honest then we know this. We are all sexual beings created for
    sex, I believe that each of us can have sex with both sexes. However, our sexuality, derived from taught behavior, influences from society, family, friends, book, tv etc..
    cloud things up and then we stumble down different roads. Many guys do not have
    sex with females because for what ever reason they had sex with a male first, and then the mind said, ok I must be gay, then they go down the gay path, not opened to female experiences. Some do and do not like due to one awkward experience,
    yet their first male experience was probably just as awkward. Being bi is difficult
    because I ask why am I with a girl for a few years, then why am I with a guy for
    a few years, am I true to myself, who is myself, or am I letting society influence me.
    Now I do not reveal being BI in public, most gays are threatened by it, as well as females. I do not have relations with both sexes at the same time, (no not 3 ways)
    if I am in a relationship. Truthfully, I would prefer to be attracted to only one sex,
    it would be so much easier on the mind and a great time saver. I cannot explain why I am attracted to both. It is more of an attraction to an individual, and not
    just a sex like most people think. Hopefully I have not rambled on, but guys, be more considerate of guys who are bi (honestly bi, not liars) as you struggled with being gay over some period of time, bi guys struggle with a few more issues and then they struggle with some discrimination from gay guys and all society).

    Now regarding the double standard of men, I am in that same category, I am more
    of a gentleman with going after a female, and more of a slut when going after the males, when I noticed this, I reflected on it, I did not come up with an answer, but
    it is just more natural and guys allow it, we change for females because they actually
    communicate.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2008 5:45 PM GMT
    Sexuality is individual.
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    Jul 07, 2008 9:30 PM GMT
    And the whole problem/conflict with bisexuality is what? Sounds like alotta drama for something rather simple; being attracted to men and women.

    When you're a MTF pre-op transexual, that's gone from being attracted to men to being attracted to women then you can start worrying about your sexuality.

    Otherwise I'm with Sedative "sexuality is individual"
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    Jul 07, 2008 9:54 PM GMT
    I have heard that people often get pissed when they say that such tendencies to swing from loving one sex to the other or both, are phases that people go through.
    — Phases maybe, or some other strange awakening or inner revelation that tells you— “hey, I like that.”

    Shit happens.

    Williams S. Burroughs discovered that towards his old age he enjoyed the presence(sexual favors) of women rather than his usual(young men).

    Phases...blah...cough.

    And then that Kinsey scale.



    yup
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jul 07, 2008 10:51 PM GMT
    we get this question over and over again in some fashion over and over again but it's worth repeating because it's how we all work as sexual beings

    Most people define themselves as either homosexual or heterosexual
    Very very few - even the ones who say that they are Bi-sexual really like men and women exactly the same or as much

    all of us fall along a scale... a hetero-homosexual scale
    where 1 is completely heterosexual and 10 is completely homosexual
    That is the infamous Kinsey scale
    a VAST majority of us even us homosexual guys fall somewhere in the center
    we might be somewhere closer to 10 but we are in the middle
    so if you think about the other end of the scale
    and all the guys who SAY they're str8 icon_rolleyes.gif

    Do you see where some homophobia can be explained here?

  • byronicheros

    Posts: 211

    Jul 08, 2008 1:17 AM GMT
    I like this discussion because I've been wondering about myself lately...(well actually i've been wondering about myself my whole life), however i've been contemplating if i'm bisexual. I agree with the kinsey scale, I think sexuality is way too complex for it to be either "black" or "white". I think when I was younger, I was definitely born gay, however with societal influences and pressures I kinda forced myself to be attracted to females growing up (even though I never had sex with one). So it's interesting now to discover I end up looking at them even now knowing that I am gay. So, when people ask, I say i'm gay with straight tendancies (sp?). The other night I made out with a girl for the first time (nope, never did it growing up)...And I kinda liked it. So, now i'm questioning if I'm actually more bisexual than I recently thought.
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    Jul 08, 2008 1:19 AM GMT
    well, in my case i can say that by turn the head to see the ass of a girl passing by does not applies to be BI, because as you said, the younger me was so conditioned to do that. so at this stage in my life i keep doing that even when i don't fell attracted to girls. is some kind the same result as the pavlov's dog experiment icon_confused.gif
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    Jul 10, 2008 1:58 PM GMT
    ClicheMemberName saidI like this discussion because I've been wondering about myself lately...(well actually i've been wondering about myself my whole life), however i've been contemplating if i'm bisexual. I agree with the kinsey scale, I think sexuality is way too complex for it to be either "black" or "white". I think when I was younger, I was definitely born gay, however with societal influences and pressures I kinda forced myself to be attracted to females growing up (even though I never had sex with one). So it's interesting now to discover I end up looking at them even now knowing that I am gay. So, when people ask, I say i'm gay with straight tendancies (sp?). The other night I made out with a girl for the first time (nope, never did it growing up)...And I kinda liked it. So, now i'm questioning if I'm actually more bisexual than I recently thought.


    Have you ever had a crush on a girl? If so then you could be bisexual. I have looked at women's physiques, but that does not mean I get a hard-on for them. Some women have great bodies. Just like straight guys will admire guys with great bodies. Human beings are attracted to physical beauty, whether it be same or opposite sex. The question is though, who do they have the emotions and the erection for?
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    Jul 10, 2008 7:11 PM GMT
    Personally, I can screw anything that moves but I fell for a guy about 5 years ago and here we still are.
  • byronicheros

    Posts: 211

    Jul 11, 2008 5:41 PM GMT
    JBE60 said
    ClicheMemberName saidI like this discussion because I've been wondering about myself lately...(well actually i've been wondering about myself my whole life), however i've been contemplating if i'm bisexual. I agree with the kinsey scale, I think sexuality is way too complex for it to be either "black" or "white". I think when I was younger, I was definitely born gay, however with societal influences and pressures I kinda forced myself to be attracted to females growing up (even though I never had sex with one). So it's interesting now to discover I end up looking at them even now knowing that I am gay. So, when people ask, I say i'm gay with straight tendancies (sp?). The other night I made out with a girl for the first time (nope, never did it growing up)...And I kinda liked it. So, now i'm questioning if I'm actually more bisexual than I recently thought.


    Have you ever had a crush on a girl? If so then you could be bisexual. I have looked at women's physiques, but that does not mean I get a hard-on for them. Some women have great bodies. Just like straight guys will admire guys with great bodies. Human beings are attracted to physical beauty, whether it be same or opposite sex. The question is though, who do they have the emotions and the erection for?


    Yeah, had plenty of crushes on girls...I just don't know if i can keep it up long enough to have sex with them...
  • PRDGUY

    Posts: 641

    Jul 12, 2008 1:21 AM GMT
    GQjock saidwe get this question over and over again in some fashion over and over again but it's worth repeating because it's how we all work as sexual beings

    Most people define themselves as either homosexual or heterosexual
    Very very few - even the ones who say that they are Bi-sexual really like men and women exactly the same or as much

    all of us fall along a scale... a hetero-homosexual scale
    where 1 is completely heterosexual and 10 is completely homosexual
    That is the infamous Kinsey scale
    a VAST majority of us even us homosexual guys fall somewhere in the center
    we might be somewhere closer to 10 but we are in the middle
    so if you think about the other end of the scale
    and all the guys who SAY they're str8 icon_rolleyes.gif

    Do you see where some homophobia can be explained here?



    Kinsey is 0=ttly excl never been SSA [straight]to 6 = tttly excl homo.....never kissed touched a female.

    IU, where the Kinsey institute is located has used the same scale 0-6 but with the advent of computers, and anonymous answers, one can be morehonest. This has led to a smaller stand. dev. and excellent irrefutable results because of the millions that have answered their 'survey.

    I personally hate labels and when asked homo/hetro, I reply YES, then move on to explain I am a sexual being and find bothe attractive and wish to 'play/ have sex' with both sexes if I find them cute Some say the figure of 92%+ figure of guys being bi is way too hi..... so IO have to clarify that bi means a wide spectrum, ie bi 'to sum extent'.Also as others noted, sexuality is unique to each of us, andwe have an even wider spectrum of 'scores' based on the Kinsey scale. Next I hear that its just one mans opinion, which is ridiculous, because numerous others have worked within the school within IU [the university] along with the those attempting to get their doctorates and or graduate/ masters degrees.
    Some still wanna argue no such thing like there are only a black color or a white color, and grey, and the numerous shades in between, do not exist. [???!!!???]

    Then their last gasp to hold on to their ignorance (yes sorry but I have been attacked severely and often here becuz I have slept with femalesas well as males and fathered 2 children they cry out one school (actually one highly-rated University with a huge endowment for the Institute)like other disciplines, yet The medical school UM - Mayo Clinic has refined after 13 yrs the MMSI-I and MMSI-II, modeled after the gold standard Multi Minnisota Personality Interview I and II [MMPI I and II], [>MMSI=Multi Min. SEXUAL Int., fyi} which is a two day testing period, that also provides a validty T score, as it will ask similiar questions different ways to see whether u are answering truthful. THEN u meet with a psycyatrist, and the final score differs little (statistically NONE).

    PART THAT BOTHERS ME IS PERSONS WHO ARE ACTIVE POSTERS, WHICH IS GREAT, DEMEANING THE FACT THAT ALL OF US UNDER THE RAINBOW ARE NOT YET TOLERATED/ACCEPTED, INC: ssa PERSONS {sAME sEX aTTRACTED], YET THEN A DAY OR TWO LATER THEY ARE ACTUALLLY HATEFUL ACCUSING US THAT WE ARE CONFUSED, dON'T KNOW ANYTHING, mENTALLY ILL, OR JUST IN DENIAL BECUZ WE ARE AFRAID OF COMING OUT. not me.... mY SEXUALITY IS MY BUSINESS YET IF ASKED iM STRAIGHTFOWARD. jUST RECENTLY A NEW FRIEND JUMPED ONN MY COMPUTER B4 i COULD GET UP AND TURN OFF PICS OF DUDES 69'IN AND HUGE COCKS. HE ASKED IF i WAS GAY, SAID HATE LABELS BUT NO, iM LIKE MOST MEN, ARE BI. WHICH LED TO A DISCUSSION. nOW WE ARE THE BEST OF FRIENDS AND HE HAS BEEN HITTING ON ME, WITH US PLAYING SUM, BUT THATS SOMETHING FOR ANOTHER DAY.


    We are supposed to be the tolerant folks, accepting not lifestyle choices of others, but the fact that we are who we are as we were born, each different and unique. Latly the Cleveland Clinic has mapped the brain of men and again when 90%= of men are shown homo-erotic to men on men to guys that are hotties, the pleasure centers light up. Science/ research is always ahead of those who wish to clng to disproven, unsupported theories. Its my hope they will eventually educate thenselves.
  • medic

    Posts: 25

    Jul 12, 2008 1:47 AM GMT
    In my younger years I definitely swung both ways and was in a relationship for 7 years then married to a woman. During that time I still was strongly attracted to guys. We parted and I still considered myself Bi for almost 20 years then realized through an accidental love affair with a male friend that I was definitely gay now. I came out, he did not. I admire attractive women today but neither desire nor plan to pursue them for intimacy.

    My belief and experience is that sexuality is on a continuum and is not static. I don't know what % gay I was before but today I know what I want.

    Perhaps in 20 years we will have another study that says "whatever". Definitions are judgments and mean nothing. Enjoy where you are and accept it.
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    Jul 12, 2008 2:02 AM GMT
    PRDGUY said nOW WE ARE THE BEST OF FRIENDS AND HE HAS BEEN HITTING ON ME, WITH US PLAYING SUM, BUT THATS SOMETHING FOR ANOTHER DAY.
    We are supposed to be the tolerant folks, accepting not lifestyle choices of others, but the fact that we are who we are as we were born . . .


    You write just like the guy who put up that illiterate GOY site. Some in caps, some lowercase, some correctly spelled, some (sum?) "cute" misspellings, which aren't cute at all but just annoying.

    Are you the author?
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    Jul 12, 2008 2:25 AM GMT
    Ghen saidWhen you're a MTF pre-op transexual, that's gone from being attracted to men to being attracted to women then you can start worrying about your sexuality.



    Why would that be something to worry about?

    I believe sexuality is complex, influenced by a range of social and biological factors and, for some, can be fluid.
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    Jul 12, 2008 2:37 AM GMT
    Sedative saidSexuality is individual.


    I second that statement 110%.

    Like whomever and whichever legal, of age and willing sex partner you want. But use protection and get tested regularly.

    I'd posted something else, but everyone else seems to have said most of what I was thinking and some of what I wasn't thinking at all :]
  • PRDGUY

    Posts: 641

    Jul 12, 2008 11:12 AM GMT
    jprichva said
    PRDGUY said nOW WE ARE THE BEST OF FRIENDS AND HE HAS BEEN HITTING ON ME, WITH US PLAYING SUM, BUT THATS SOMETHING FOR ANOTHER DAY.
    We are supposed to be the tolerant folks, accepting not lifestyle choices of others, but the fact that we are who we are as we were born . . .


    You write just like the guy who put up that illiterate GOY site. Some in caps, some lowercase, some correctly spelled, some (sum?) "cute" misspellings, which aren't cute at all but just annoying.

    Are you the author?



    sorry! I'd be the last one there now as i did explore their beliefs but I soon learned the true nature of the group. So readers know, wrote in hurry as I planned o come back and fix most all, yet have read many forum posts in which other members spelling was worse and they utilized text messaging spelling as well as writing very hateful things against people here, I find no connection between g0y, a cult, and persons who are truly bi.

    In talking to you I know per your words you meant no harm, yet I'm replying so that other will realize it since u have not deleted this post.


    Many persons feel the need to put down others when their facts are indefensable. Its an easy way to build themselves up by knocking others down. Seems many persons on this site practice this.


    As an aside, before I was removed from the g0y group due to my believe it is each persons own choice to believe what they wish- the owner/author writer u mistaked 4 me was under federal warrant and the treasury dept had arrested him. `
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2008 11:15 AM GMT
    PRDGUY said Many persons feel the need to put down others when their facts are indefensable. Its an easy way to build themselves up by knocking others down. Seems many persons on this site practice this.


    I apologize. Like a lot of people, I do and say dumb things sometimes when I'm angry. I should not have taken a cheap shot at you. Sorry.
  • PRDGUY

    Posts: 641

    Jul 12, 2008 11:28 AM GMT
    jprichva said
    PRDGUY said Many persons feel the need to put down others when their facts are indefensable. Its an easy way to build themselves up by knocking others down. Seems many persons on this site practice this.


    I apologize. Like a lot of people, I do and say dumb things sometimes when I'm angry. I should not have taken a cheap shot at you. Sorry.



    THANK YOU.


    You are a better man than most on here!!
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    Jul 12, 2008 4:00 PM GMT
    atari84 said
    Ghen saidWhen you're a MTF pre-op transexual, that's gone from being attracted to men to being attracted to women then you can start worrying about your sexuality.



    Why would that be something to worry about?

    I believe sexuality is complex, influenced by a range of social and biological factors and, for some, can be fluid.


    That's what I was pretty much trying to say.icon_biggrin.gif

    So worrying about sexuality really isn't worth it.