Is it racist if you are not physically attracted to people except those share your own ethnicity?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2012 9:50 PM GMT
    I'm not so sure this is racism- just look at the vast majority of couples. Seem to be the same race. Maybe its some kind of subconscious thing?icon_question.gif

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    Mar 09, 2012 10:00 PM GMT
    Sexual attraction and racism are two very different things.
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    Mar 09, 2012 10:12 PM GMT
    To me it depends on the reason.

    There is a difference between dating someone of the same race because you are attracted, and dating someone of the same race because you feel you have 2.

    I am from Alabama so I deff get it.
    But from my experience..people will always find something to say when race is involved.

    Like Im black but I like White guys and Hawaiians, Asians..everyone. I see people for who they are and not what they are, and I dated black men 2, but for some reason when I am with a white guy or whatever...people say I am ashamed of my race or walking on the wild side, jungle fever ...etc, but when a person of a different race ask me out and I say no..then its

    "Is it because im white."

    It gets old, but I think if you limit yourself to who you feel you should date then you may miss out on your perfect match,

    but if you just tend to be attracted to a certain race...then that is preference and we all know sexual preference and attraction...is something that cannot be helped.

    So I do not think it is racist.
    But you are right alot of it is subconscious..just like the ideas of masculine and feminine. And when we go against what is often considered the norm..trouble can ensue and cause trouble.

    But again if you think you are doing it out of society teaching you too, then maybe you should broaden your horizon or experience, but if its 100 percent pure attraction, then there is nothing you can do.
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    Mar 09, 2012 10:15 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidSexual attraction and racism are two very different things.


    This.
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    Mar 09, 2012 10:19 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidSexual attraction and racism are two very different things.


    And often incessantly confused.
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    Mar 09, 2012 10:19 PM GMT
    Is it racist if you are not physically attracted to people except those share your own ethnicity?

    Are you actually not attracted: in other words, you look at a guy of a different race and you are not in the slightest sexually attracted, like looking at a woman of even your own race?

    Or is it that even though you might find them sexually attractive, you would not act upon your attraction other than to deny or ignore it?

    Not being at all attracted would be a preference, the other might be racist, but even if so, it might not be of the overt variety, maybe not even conscious, maybe something a person might grow out of. And I don't even know if racist is the right word for that, because even though you might deny a sexual attraction doesn't mean that you would disrespect that person or treat them differently in any other regard. In which case many might say it passes for a preference, even if there's something more to it.

    Maybe it's like seeing someone who completely turns you on until you find out his personality sucks and you reject him on that basis. Does that make you prejudiced? I just couldnt get past the color of his thoughts.
  • Generaleclect...

    Posts: 504

    Mar 10, 2012 12:06 AM GMT
    Yes it is racist, you goddamn racist bastard... racist. icon_razz.gif

    Some of our feelings/tastes are more socially ingrained than we like to think, everyone has different comfort levels, people are individuals, etc etc.
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    Mar 10, 2012 12:09 AM GMT
    This question just made me think about something


    what about those guys who like WHite, Black and Asians, etc because we are white, black and asian.

    You know those people who find us...EXOTIC.

    If they are only attracted because they find us exotic or what not isn't that somewhat racial or something? Or is it still preference?icon_question.gif
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    Mar 10, 2012 12:40 AM GMT
    It's not a conscious thing- like I see someone and immediately mark them off b/c of their ethnicity. It's more like I have just noticed looking back that I am more attracted to my own ethnicity....seems weird. I can definitely recognize an attractive person of any race (I'm not blind). But as for personal preference, it seems to be limited to ppl who are the same color I am, and I wasn't sure if anybody else had that same experience.
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    Mar 10, 2012 7:44 AM GMT
    no

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    Mar 10, 2012 8:07 AM GMT
    field123 saidIt's not a conscious thing- like I see someone and immediately mark them off b/c of their ethnicity. It's more like I have just noticed looking back that I am more attracted to my own ethnicity....seems weird. I can definitely recognize an attractive person of any race (I'm not blind). But as for personal preference, it seems to be limited to ppl who are the same color I am, and I wasn't sure if anybody else had that same experience.


    Maybe That's who you grew up around and fond of?. But I think people shouldn't knock something until you try it. I like ALL men and I'm glad that I am THAT open to give guys of any race a chance, because skin color or one's up bringing is just that. Being open minded and actually trying new things will definitely open your eyes to a bigger picture.
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    Mar 10, 2012 8:16 AM GMT
    I don't know. I don't see color. People tell me I'm white and I believe them because I get pretty good service at the cracker barrel.
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    Mar 10, 2012 8:17 AM GMT
    field123 saidI'm not so sure this is racism- just look at the vast majority of couples. Seem to be the same race. Maybe its some kind of subconscious thing?icon_question.gif

    no it's not racist, it's just preference.
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    Mar 10, 2012 8:20 AM GMT
    If you are more interested in people that are exotic for other reasons e.g. accent, culturual differences et cetera over your own culture, does that make you racist too?

    For me, it was because it seemed to make people more interesting. But really it's truly window dressing once you start to dig deeper.
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    Mar 10, 2012 9:23 AM GMT
    Well if I am use to Fried Chicken and Collard Greens, what would make me all of a sudden try Sushi...

    Nothing wrong with going with what you know.
    Or having a preference because of what you know.

    Seems legit to me.
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    Mar 10, 2012 9:52 AM GMT
    No, it's not racist. I'm mainly into white guys but a lot of it is because blond guys fall under "white guys." Like, I have no racist sentiments toward Asians but am not sexually attracted to them.
  • MarvelClimber

    Posts: 511

    Mar 14, 2012 8:54 AM GMT
    Firebrand saidNo, it's not racist. I'm mainly into white guys but a lot of it is because blond guys fall under "white guys." Like, I have no racist sentiments toward Asians but am not sexually attracted to them.


    So if an attractive (according to your standards) white guy with naturally dark hair bleaches his hair, would you suddenly find him attractive? What about a Japanese guy who bleaches his hair? Let's be real: "Blonde guys" is just another way of saying "white guys."

    These kinds of "preferences" often stem from privilege. Privilege allows broad dismissals of options or perspectives. Privilege dims introspection... there's no need to evaluate what draws you to something or why you're averted from something else. For everything else you like and dislike I'm sure you can come up with a list of why. I challenge you to do the same for the group of people you mention.

    That leads to the term "Asians" itself. Which Asians aren't you attracted to? That word homogenizes hundreds, if not thousands, of different races. Although I'm sure I could find undesirable traits among some of those races, can I really aggregate those traits from all those individual races and summarily dismiss an abstract set of guys?

    The point is, preference and racism are not mutually exclusive. Preference can be based on prejudice (ie, "I like blacks cuz they got that swagger"). Preference can be based on a correlation between traits and personal beliefs (ie, "I like guys with dark hair because it makes them look mysterious"). Preference can be based on many things... without understanding why you gravitate towards something, you can't say for certain that your preference is not rooted in prejudice, stereotypes, or blatant racism.
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    Mar 14, 2012 9:22 AM GMT
    HisAlterEgo saidHi i r butthurt


    You're just butthurt because got rejected by a white guy or three... you have a giant victim complex and it's showing.

    That aside, I like natural blonds, always have. It happens to be that white guys are the only non-albino folks who are naturally blond. Pretty simple.

    Trying to insert your "everything whitey thinks is inherently racist" argument is racist in that you assume everything a supposedly "privileged" (where's my United White College Fund? Huh? I see no National Association for the Advancement of Caucasian People) person such as myself would think is subliminally racist or influenced by racism, and by that logic you are assuming the thought processes of all whites (those you have deemed "privileged") are racist.

    Preference stems from cultural standards and from experience. There's nothing wrong with liking what everyone else likes; there's a reason people think Chris Evans is hot: because he embodies numerous desirable traits in a mate. Going from that, I prefer guys with muscular builds. 99+% of Asians are simply too skinny, or otherwise don't work out. That's genetics. None are naturally blond, and I've really been into blond guys ever since I knew I liked guys. I also prefer cut dick; statistically, most Asians are uncut (not a dealbreaker, but still a preference.) I am also not attracted to round faces. That rules out Asians.

    See? None of that was racist, yet you assumed my non-attraction to Asians stemmed from racist sentiment since you are a racist with a victim complex and view all whites as cultural oppressors, hence your quick, racially-based judgment of why I am not attracted to Asians.

    Now, answer this, which is more racist: a white guy who prefers others of his own race, or a white guy who prefers black guys? I'd argue neither is racist, as each has their own taste and is entitled to it.
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    Mar 14, 2012 9:26 AM GMT
    HisAlterEgo said
    So if an attractive (according to your standards) white guy with naturally dark hair bleaches his hair, would you suddenly find him attractive? What about a Japanese guy who bleaches his hair? Let's be real: "Blonde guys" is just another way of saying "white guys."


    So if an attractive FEMALE dresses up like a male to fit your standards of a hot guy, would you suddenly find her I mean him attractive? Let's be real: having a preference of a type of guy is a fundamental as having a preference of male and/or female. If you don't want to fuck a chick then don't get mad if someone doesn't want to fuck you.
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    Mar 14, 2012 9:28 AM GMT
    Gay guys have hard time finding a boyfriend in the first place. Having some common foundation such as - race, culture, city, language Make them to feel safe in their relationship.

    Its not racism, its more personal preference.
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    Mar 14, 2012 9:31 AM GMT
    HisAlterEgo saidThese kinds of "preferences" often stem from privilege. Privilege allows broad dismissals of options or perspectives. Privilege dims introspection... there's no need to evaluate what draws you to something or why you're averted from something else. For everything else you like and dislike I'm sure you can come up with a list of why. I challenge you to do the same for the group of people you mention.


    I challenge you to come up with a list of reasons why you don't want to have sex with females.
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    Mar 14, 2012 9:32 AM GMT
    I think attraction is all about your individual preference.

    Now, if you use that to stereotype and judge other ethnicities then it becomes prejudice. That's racism.

    If I am friends with other races, but I'm not dating within those other races, I do not believe that I am racist. If I use that as an excuse to treat one group with favor and another group badly, then it's wrong.
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    Mar 14, 2012 9:33 AM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidI prefer mutts and mixed breeds to pure breeds of any kind ...


    I agree. Mutts are my fav. Any kind of mutt of any mix of ethnicities. My only exception to this rule is Irish...I love Irish.
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    Mar 14, 2012 12:27 PM GMT
    This thread needs pictures.

    421909_365499916804616_240859645935311_1
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    Mar 14, 2012 12:49 PM GMT
    Just ask yourself, what are the attributes that are actually applying to the case.
    If you talk about a job, the usual attributes would be qualification, work experience, education and so on. Judging because of looks would in most cases be inappropriate here.
    If you take the case of what you like to see in a person's body, looks are the right attributes to look at.