Anyone else keep getting rejected for being "too different"?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 6:25 PM GMT
    I am getting frustrated...I just got dumped by my first bf about a month ago and his reasoning was that he thinks were "too different"..,Whether thats a coverup for some other reason I dont know..but I generally go for guys who are very different than me, from looks to personality and interests...who wants someone exactly the same as you?

    Anyways, I just started talking to another guy and this morning he tells me he doesnt think its gonna work cuz again "were too different"...WTF? I did not need to here that shit again at all!! That honestly ruined my day...

    Anyways, have any of you been dumped or rejected for this reason? and does dating someone who has different interests than you and a completely different personality than you scare you off?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 6:27 PM GMT
    ZennedDaFuckOut saidI am getting frustrated...I just got dumped by my first bf about a month ago and his reasoning was that he thinks were "too different"..,Whether thats a coverup for some other reason I dont know..but I generally go for guys who are very different than me, from looks to personality and interests...who wants someone exactly the same as you?

    Anyways, I just started talking to another guy and this morning he tells me he doesnt think its gonna work cuz again "were too different"...WTF? I did not need to here that shit again at all!! That honestly ruined my day...

    Anyways, have any of you been dumped or rejected for this reason? and does dating someone who has different interests than you and a completely different personality than you scare you off?


    stay different.We need to fight conformity at every opportunity.Never ever compromise who you are to make someone else happy.
    There isn't anything wrong with you, just wait you'll find someone who really appreciates the fact your not like everyone else, so dear God don't change!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 6:32 PM GMT
    vanfreak said
    ZennedDaFuckOut saidI am getting frustrated...I just got dumped by my first bf about a month ago and his reasoning was that he thinks were "too different"..,Whether thats a coverup for some other reason I dont know..but I generally go for guys who are very different than me, from looks to personality and interests...who wants someone exactly the same as you?

    Anyways, I just started talking to another guy and this morning he tells me he doesnt think its gonna work cuz again "were too different"...WTF? I did not need to here that shit again at all!! That honestly ruined my day...

    Anyways, have any of you been dumped or rejected for this reason? and does dating someone who has different interests than you and a completely different personality than you scare you off?


    stay different.We need to fight conformity at every opportunity.Never ever compromise who you are to make someone else happy.
    There isn't anything wrong with you, just wait you'll find someone who really appreciates the fact your not like everyone else, so dear God don't change!!!

    thanks man, very true...but its hard not to take it to heart icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 9:35 PM GMT
    Take it as a compliment... you were better than them because you were different and they were just generic and boring. Embrace being different man!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 9:40 PM GMT
    you should be getting wasted
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Mar 17, 2012 9:47 PM GMT
    I get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 9:50 PM GMT
    Maybe it's just a way of politely saying they're not interested, I mean it's so difficult to let down a guy easy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 9:52 PM GMT
    mizu5 saidI get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.


    Oh thats my bday let me reinvent you
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 9:55 PM GMT
    Hypnotico saidMaybe it's just a way of politely saying they're not interested, I mean it's so difficult to let down a guy easy.


    I thought you never say no?
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Mar 17, 2012 9:59 PM GMT
    Anulap said
    mizu5 saidI get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.


    Thats good then I wont have to revoked you gay card.

    What type of guy is telling you "youre too different"?
    most. Especially once we talk about my hobbies, which on anduru on here knows about LOL as I've known him forever
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Mar 17, 2012 11:50 PM GMT
    Anulap said
    mizu5 said
    Anulap said
    mizu5 saidI get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.


    Thats good then I wont have to revoked you gay card.

    What type of guy is telling you "youre too different"?
    most. Especially once we talk about my hobbies, which on anduru on here knows about LOL as I've known him forever


    What about a guy that is exactly like you?
    Hrm I haven't met many?

    And I'm not so much my type.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 11:53 PM GMT
    mizu5 saidI get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.


    I like your "weirdness". It sets a guy apart from all them other gay menfolk out there.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 17, 2012 11:59 PM GMT
    We are all very different from one another and thats what makes each one of us unique.

    I mean these a-holes are not even giving you the chance to let them know you so why even care what they say. Also keep in mind that guys lie too much and can come up with any made up excuse for anything especially when they have something to hide.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:06 AM GMT
    You should try getting rejected as many times as I have because I'm black, lol~
    I don't even get to the point where people see that I'm weird, (tee hee hee)

    It does affect your spirit to when you are rejected on the basis of something that you can or maybe cannot change.
    "Should I change for him?" (No...)
    "Am I just that bad looking?" (HELL no... well... sometimes, lol...)

    Just know that if they rejected you based on such superficial things, then you simply dodged a bullet, lol~

    Oh yea, I'd date the hell outta you! Massages, breakfast in bed, cuddling and all icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:06 AM GMT
    mizu5 saidI get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.


    I feel the same way
  • xKorix

    Posts: 607

    Mar 18, 2012 1:11 AM GMT
    I've always been different. I've been lucky to find a partner as unique as I am, who isn't bothered by my eccentricities because he as equally eccentric. As well I'm lucky to have people in my family that are similar to me in their uniqueness and that I can connect and relate to them. I actually find mostly that children and the elderly easiest to relate too. They're the most authentic and comfortable with themselves and their uniqueness. I find most people fake and rigid, their personalities are extremely calculated(e.g. Masculine Jock, Quirky Vegan, Sports enthusiast, Catty Diva, Eccentric Artist etc.) I hate that shit it reeks of trying way too hard and is limited, people don't explore or express all parts of them selves, they just pick and choose how to present themselves in a manner that will get them the most attention. It's not completely real or maybe only slightly real.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:12 AM GMT
    opposites attract icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:13 AM GMT
    Only been rejected once in real life and that was because we had nothing in common other than wanting a shag. I'm good at reading people so I can usually tell whether I'm someone's cup of tea. I do know that a lot of gay men don't find me attractive because I'm too 'pretty' looking or as some Guy said here 'like a chick with a dick ' lol. Guess that's why I've never had a relationship with a gay man.

    Personally I love the way I look, if other people have a problem with it then fuck em!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:13 AM GMT
    yes
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:18 AM GMT
    Just be who you are. The right man who can accept YOU, as you are, will eventually come along. You will reach a point in time when you become "self-righteously" satisfied that you stuck to your guns. It's called self acceptance. Brace yourself for kissing a lot of frogs until then.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:21 AM GMT
    Anulap said
    whateveryo saidOnly been rejected once in real life and that was because we had nothing in common other than wanting a shag. I'm good at reading people so I can usually tell whether I'm someone's cup of tea. I do know that a lot of gay men don't find me attractive because I'm too 'pretty' looking or as some Guy said here 'like a chick with a dick ' lol. Guess that's why I've never had a relationship with a gay man.


    Not even a hook up?


    One or two yeah but I'm not a big hook up kinda guy. Plus I remember with one gay guy I had to send him packing cause I had beer goggles when he picked me up at a club. It didn't feel great and I felt like a cock tease for leading him on. So not had the best gay hook up experiences.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:31 AM GMT
    be yourself, dont conform to whatever else people want you to be
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 18, 2012 1:33 AM GMT
    ZennedDaFuckOut said...but I generally go for guys who are very different than me, from looks to personality and interests...who wants someone exactly the same as you?


    There is a difference between having someone that is exactly the same as you and having someone with similar interests. There MUST be some commonality in order to build a good relationship. Couples that have nothing in common will not survive long term.

    [quote]Anyways, have any of you been dumped or rejected for this reason? and does dating someone who has different interests than you and a completely different personality than you scare you off? [/quote]

    When I was still single, I heard it a lot, but it was more as an excuse not because I was really that different.

    In your profile you state that you are "a down to earth college dude." So,... if that's true, how can you be so different that no one wants to date you long term?

    Good luck to you.
  • Suetonius

    Posts: 1842

    Mar 18, 2012 1:38 AM GMT
    vanfreak said
    ZennedDaFuckOut saidI am getting frustrated...I just got dumped by my first bf about a month ago and his reasoning was that he thinks were "too different"..,
    stay different.We need to fight conformity at every opportunity.Never ever compromise who you are to make someone else happy.
    There isn't anything wrong with you, just wait you'll find someone who really appreciates the fact your not like everyone else, so dear God don't change!!!

    +1
    Of course be sad if you just got dumped; go listen to some sad music. If you were "country," I'd say go get drunk. But when you come out of your funk, realize that it is better for both of you that you do not remain in a relationship where one of you (him) is not happy (for whatever reason, and he might not even be able to articulate the reason accurately). There will be other guys. In the long run, most relationships that work out are between people who are different from each other. If you were entirely the same in everything, how boring it would all become.

    In my case, my own partner and I are very alike in some respects and totally different in others. We complement each other. There are even traits of each other that we almost can't stand, but we put up with them for the sake of the good things between us.

    Take heart - there are others out there who will be attracted by the differences between you.
  • Suetonius

    Posts: 1842

    Mar 18, 2012 1:41 AM GMT
    7Famark said
    mizu5 saidI get told I'm too diffferent. I don't here "we're too different' that often. More that I'm weird.

    And it's true. It's why when I move back to Toronto April 1st, I'm reinventing myself. It's time to be status quo.


    I feel the same way

    Guy, there's nothing wrong with seeming a bit "weird" to others. Lots of us appear to be a bit weird to others - even to our friends who put up with it.
    Much better than being boring. Be yourself.