How do you feel about....

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2012 9:53 AM GMT
    ...guys who lie about their age and you know they lied it and they know you know they lied about it?

    Does it bother you that a man has to lie about his age (or anything else for that matter) in order to get noticed? I always thought that women were the ones who hid their age whereas men embraced it and showed it off like a badge of honor. Am I wrong to think this and I am I wrong to be turned off by a guy who can't keep it honest and just own up to who he is and how old he is regardless of whether someone would or wouldn't do anything with him?

    Discuss.

    There's a story to go with this topic but I just wanna see a few responses first before I tell it.
  • Laurence

    Posts: 942

    Mar 22, 2012 9:57 AM GMT
    People can be quite prejudiced when it comes to age, especially in personal ads. So most people knock a couple of years off to attract more interest.

    It's not the end of the world, or lie of the century.

    If you're a gay guy who looks after yourself. Then chances are you look younger than your years.

    If I'm dating someone for a while though, I'd expect the guy to come clean about their real age and certainly wouldn't hold it against them for a little lie.

    If they say they're single and they're not. That's a different kettle of fish.

    Loz
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    Mar 22, 2012 10:59 AM GMT
    If you're just hooking up - who cares.

    But if you're actually trying to meet people and forge a relationship - even a casual friendship - even online - it's lame. It's not a deal-breaker, but you've gotta come clean fairly quickly.

    To keep that lie going is unacceptable. You're proving yourself to be a bit shady and untrustworthy. Who wants a friend like that?
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    Mar 22, 2012 11:08 AM GMT
    I hate it. I really want to date someone my age and I've wasted two years with guys who lied about theirs.
    By the time I'll date someone my age I'll be 30. I'll never even know what it's like to be with someone to whom all the sexual things are new and exciting.

    For example, my first time wasn't magical at all, I just met with some guy (who was probably cheating on his wife) and he just did me, it was shallow crap.
    (If you ask, I did him, because I couldn't get anyone else online (nor offline).)

    Guys, quit lying about your age, you're ruining how special it could be to explore sexuality for some kid.
    When I was 16 - 19 I wished for sex so much, then when I got laid at 20 it now seems as special as taking a dump.

    Sorry, guys, but lying about your age isn't "making other people more openminded" it's you being a complete asshole, thinking you deserve whoever you want (over someone else who might be an honest guy, even).
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    Mar 22, 2012 12:51 PM GMT
    It's symptomatic of the greater issues in society, and beyond my control. There's so much pressure on us to be something other than we are that we all buckle at some level or another to conform. Maybe that's in the clothing we wear, cars we drive, careers we select, age we portray, weight we try passing as, etc. I guess I'm saying it doesn't matter to me, but it does has an effect on a larger scale, i.e.: what's believable?
  • tautomer

    Posts: 1010

    Mar 22, 2012 5:03 PM GMT
    It pisses me off and I have (and will) call the guy out for it. Honestly, I am going to eventually find out. Lying actually makes it worse because if there is something about them that doesn't meet a requirement I have then I won't allow it.
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    Mar 22, 2012 5:35 PM GMT
    If someone lies about their age and turns out to look a very different age in person, then that's an issue. The bait and switch isn't a good thing to go with.

    But if someone lies about their age BUT they look like the incorrect age. I have no problem with that. Especially if the person is just a hook up or a FWB/FB. Not every contact starts of with an agreement of a relationship. If you are starting on that footing, then be honest.

    Think about it this way. Peoples weight changes every so often, does everyone go on every single of their online profiles and correct that info and always keep it upto date? no? well, that a lie, isn't it?
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    Mar 22, 2012 7:27 PM GMT
    alright already! i'll come clean; i'm really not 91. ok, you happy now? you've ruined my changes of bagging a centenarian.

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    Mar 22, 2012 9:51 PM GMT
    Honestly, I don't think I'd hold it against them too much. Then again, I haven't met someone like that...or maybe I have and I just haven't figured it out icon_eek.gif
    I'd say it depends on the context on which the lie was made.
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    Mar 22, 2012 9:56 PM GMT
    It's silly, but then so is not wanting to date anyone because they are older than ___ fill in the blank.
    Plus, I'd much rather someone lie about their age prior to meeting and then when we meet they come clean, than say, lie about being monogamous, being STD free or not having a criminal record. If the age lie is the big one, I'd pick that one every time.
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    Mar 22, 2012 10:16 PM GMT
    strapguy said... It's not a deal-breaker, but you've gotta come clean fairly quickly.
    +1
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    Mar 22, 2012 10:28 PM GMT
    Before I started losing weight people thought I was in my late 40's. Lately, I have been accused of being in my 20's.

    I am comfortable with my age and not afraid to tell the truth.

    I am a happy 36.
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    Mar 22, 2012 10:30 PM GMT
    To me there's a huge difference between lying online and lying in person.
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    Mar 22, 2012 10:33 PM GMT
    I don't understand the root cause of it, to be honest. Why bother lying about your age? It's just a damned number...
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    Mar 22, 2012 10:36 PM GMT
    If I knew they were lying its kind of offensive to me. I mean do they think I'm stupid? lol At the same time I feel sorry for them, having to lie to pick up is just wrong. Who does that stuff anyways, lying about age?
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    Mar 22, 2012 11:09 PM GMT
    Jewlicious saidIf I knew they were lying its kind of offensive to me. I mean do they think I'm stupid? lol At the same time I feel sorry for them, having to lie to pick up is just wrong. Who does that stuff anyways, lying about age?


    Wanted to say something about you never having to lie...but...Da'hm.
  • araphael

    Posts: 1148

    Mar 23, 2012 3:29 AM GMT
    Guy101 said...guys who lie about their age and you know they lied it and they know you know they lied about it?

    Does it bother you that a man has to lie about his age (or anything else for that matter) in order to get noticed? I always thought that women were the ones who hid their age whereas men embraced it and showed it off like a badge of honor. Am I wrong to think this and I am I wrong to be turned off by a guy who can't keep it honest and just own up to who he is and how old he is regardless of whether someone would or wouldn't do anything with him?

    Discuss.

    There's a story to go with this topic but I just wanna see a few responses first before I tell it.


    I understand your question. But you have to understand that western culture is the most unusual and up side down culture in human history. Being old is bad and being young is good. No other culture that has lasted for thousands of years ever thought in this perverse way. But then our culture has what's called a "media" which is only about money. So that may explain your frustration possibly. Oh yeah, that may also explain the lies people tell, ha, ha.
  • Montague

    Posts: 5205

    Mar 23, 2012 3:33 AM GMT
    Just turned 236 years old this past November along with my brother TropicalMark.
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    Mar 23, 2012 3:39 AM GMT
    I could care less if I'm 40 or 50, but though I'm slowing down a bit, I'm doing alright for 30 myself.
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    Mar 23, 2012 3:41 AM GMT
    I could never understand why men do it, esp since the other one will find out when you meet. So far the only reason I can see is to land younger guys to talk with them.
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    Mar 23, 2012 3:46 AM GMT
    I dumped a guy once for lying to me about his age, and he was absolutely in love with me. His justification was that as long as he looked the age he advertised to me, than there is no harm done to me.

    I think it's wrong that people lie, but I think that we sometimes need to forgive / understand the insecurities people have about themselves and help them overcome them. We all been there.

    And I learnt not to prejudice people based on their age. One is only as old as he feels.
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    Mar 23, 2012 3:50 AM GMT
    Trollileo said

    Hey, man. Gay, man. Pick up the soap.
    Get on your knees and pray.
    You promise?
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    Mar 23, 2012 3:54 AM GMT
    It's a relatively minor lie, but it makes me wonder what else they've lied about.
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    Mar 23, 2012 5:11 AM GMT
    Interesting thread...begs some questions.

    1. What is one someone oldER to think, when profile after profile makes rude, insensitive, unnecessary statements, not even quantified with any numbers, of "no old" people, not into "older guys", etc.? Older is a comparative adjective between TWO figures: therefore, a 20-year older is "older" to an 18-year old, and so is a 52-year old to an 18-year old. Hello?

    2. Aging in fact does occur at different rates. Some 20-year olds look as if they're 30, and may look 70 when they're 45. Some 60-year olds may look 40, too. So, given the prevalent ageism evident in the profiles for a 50-year old who looks 35 who'd like to meet the widest number of possible guys, is it any wonder that he may consider to shade the age on the post to get at least a foot in the door, so to speak?

    THINK about it before you mouth off. You, too, believe it or not, will one day also be "older."
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    Mar 23, 2012 3:30 PM GMT
    smartmoney saidIt's silly, but then so is not wanting to date anyone because they are older than ___ fill in the blank.
    Plus, I'd much rather someone lie about their age prior to meeting and then when we meet they come clean, than say, lie about being monogamous, being STD free or not having a criminal record. If the age lie is the big one, I'd pick that one every time.

    Agree^^^

    If I put my real age I'll get remarks like "Really? no you dont look like it! whats your secret? are those pics yours? are those pics recent or 10 years old... etc etc.. ?" I have to go through that drama every-time! So I pick and age which most guess i might and that usually gets few questions asked! e.g. "well you look good for ___".

    Seriously can anyone tell the difference between 10-15 lbs extra weight? unless a person has a very low body fat level, you wont be able to do so. Do you keep updating people of your weight everytime it changes? no? so lying by omission?