With gay.com, manhunt, adam4adam, match.com, pof.com kind of old and dead now, where are you guys meeting dates?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 24, 2012 5:17 AM GMT
    If you are single or in an open relationship where do you guys find dates? I find the same 100 guys on all of gay sites or dating services. Wondering if most people are on phone apps now.

    Hey just wondering. Brought up the topic to see what else it out there. I've dropped all the sex sites myself, and looking for something more meaningful. I'm not an old guy by the way. Better shape than ever.
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    Mar 24, 2012 5:34 AM GMT
    Dude, you're older than me. Get the fuck off the internet and go meet people the old fashioned way...in real life (clubs, bars, parks, bus stops, airport restrooms, cathedrals, etc).
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    Mar 24, 2012 2:42 PM GMT
    Grindr always has a few surprises. I was surprised at the tiny overlap with a4a, manhunt, etc. Also guys driving through town who don't log into websites appear on Grindr. In Sacramento, lots of folks appear on Grindr from LA going north on I5 and others from Seattle going south on I5, others heading east on I80 from the SF Bay Area, still others heading west on I80 from Reno. Many of these folks would not take the time to log into websites to find a fuck or friend on gay.com or a4r or even their dumbed-down mobile application versions. Somehow though they are on Grindr.
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    Mar 24, 2012 2:49 PM GMT

    I kinda lean towards what Paul says, though I wouldn't put it quite that nasty.
    In MY opinion... the art of human contact, conversation and meeting in person is becoming a lost "art".
    I totally agree that it's the same people on each of the mentioned websites....so the short answer is: Get off your ass and get outside for a while.
    There ARE people who don't actually live in a computer out there, ya know. icon_rolleyes.gificon_rolleyes.gif
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    Mar 24, 2012 3:22 PM GMT
    I've had the best luck to find a "friend" to go out for "a drink" with on okcupid. It seems like the vast majority of profiles there have something to the effect of "Not looking for anything more than friendship" - although they are all generally the least reliable and flaky in terms of seeing them a second time.

    Grindr is hit or miss. I think it mostly comes down to what you look like, even to just meet for a drink or something, than anything else. Shocker. I know.

    I haven't been on a date since last November. So I am probably not the person to ask about that.

    Now I am going to keep hitting f5 to learn where to find guys these days.
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    Mar 24, 2012 3:48 PM GMT
    braddomo saidIf you are single or in an open relationship where do you guys find dates? I find the same 100 guys on all of gay sites or dating services. Wondering if most people are on phone apps now.

    I can't answer about using phone apps, those things didn't become really widespread until after I met my current partner, with whom I'm monogamous. I did download Grindr out of curiosity and in case some friend wanted to use it (now deleted) and concluded it would not be how I'd ever have met guys.

    I used to take a broad-spectrum approach, using all resources, live & online, not relying on just one. So I went to gay bars & clubs, joined a GLBT church, a local Equality chapter, an online regional gay social group, even joined a gay naturist (nudist) organization, spent time in live chat rooms like the old AOL ones for gays, networked within the local gay community, co-founded a GLBT Business Club, did crew on drag shows, attended gay political meetings & rallies, etc, etc. And almost every one of those avenues produced results, that included 2 partners (1 died), 2 LTRs, assorted BFs, and all the FBs, dates & tricks I could handle.

    Of course I was retired by then and could devote my time to discretionary activities, which greatly increased my effectiveness at meeting men. But it also helped that I didn't put both my eggs in one basket, like online alone, but tried to cover as many bases as I could (forgive the mixed metaphors). I would recommend that approach to the OP.
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    Mar 24, 2012 3:53 PM GMT
    Hey Brad.... Paul is right. I have hardly met anyone on a site including this one..... but go to a coffee shop, a gay bar, or in a gay area and they're are a lot of nice guys out there. The best thing to do is smile and say Hi.... if the guy checks you out from head to toe..... it could get interesting.
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    Mar 24, 2012 4:19 PM GMT
    I've never been without dates, and I'm older than most of you here. I've met guys in so many places - the current one right here on R.J. in Forums (a few years ago). Before that, here are some of the places that worked out for me:
    * In the gym or out running during my lunch hour.
    * Through other friends.
    * Through Rotary or my alumni association.
    * In my neighborhood - just by being friendly - cycling.
    * At Peet's or Starbucks.
    * A favorite: Outdoor cafes or lunch places where they'll let you have your dog with you. This is key! People will more easily speak to you if you have a dog (but is has to be a friendly looking dog - and a furry one is good too.) The dog is the ice breaker. If you have to - borrow a dog! Truly. This works!
  • neosyllogy

    Posts: 1714

    Mar 24, 2012 4:29 PM GMT
    Manhunt works great for me.
    For more relationshipy meets OkCupid is really awesome.
    Mileage will vary based on location of course.
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    Mar 24, 2012 4:31 PM GMT
    Seeing as the OP hasn't logged in today, I'm gonna rest on the assumption that he went out and either got laid or found someone to connect with. Or at least I hope so. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 24, 2012 4:41 PM GMT
    I've only up for meeting people from this site. A couple bad instances of meeting people on MH and others.
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    Mar 24, 2012 4:42 PM GMT
    must resist temptation to make remark about great places to pick up old and dead guys...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 24, 2012 4:56 PM GMT
    RealJock recently became the catalyst for meeting a nice and super hot guy icon_razz.gif
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    Mar 24, 2012 5:07 PM GMT
    Jockbod48 saidI've never been without dates, and I'm older than most of you here. I've met guys in so many places - the current one right here on R.J. in Forums (a few years ago). Before that, here are some of the places that worked out for me:
    * In the gym or out running during my lunch hour.
    * Through other friends.
    * Through Rotary or my alumni association.
    * In my neighborhood - just by being friendly - cycling.
    * At Peet's or Starbucks.
    * A favorite: Outdoor cafes or lunch places where they'll let you have your dog with you. This is key! People will more easily speak to you if you have a dog (but is has to be a friendly looking dog - and a furry one is good too.) The dog is the ice breaker. If you have to - borrow a dog! Truly. This works!


    You know of what you speak. I'd ratther meet guys your way than in bars, airport restrooms, parks, truck stops, etc. icon_smile.gif
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Mar 24, 2012 10:30 PM GMT
    Cam4.com
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 25, 2012 11:08 AM GMT
    Trollileo said
    Aggieboy saidRealJock recently became the catalyst for meeting a nice and super hot guy icon_razz.gif
    Pretty much. Met a guy here in the forums by accident. Out of a whim I extended an invitation to get coffee with him just to be friendly. Now I'm head over heels for him.

    Edit:
    I'm actually disgusted by the fact I used to hook up with people.


    Jesus and Rick Santorum would be proud of you. Well done! icon_rolleyes.gif
  • mrsmithers

    Posts: 213

    Apr 19, 2012 4:19 PM GMT
    I've noticed it's the same old people on a4a, manhunt, and CL.. They all seem to be dieing out, same people amongst the bogus profiles.. I've noticed a4a the numbers of online profiles have gone way down within the past few years.. I think the online thing is getting old.. In my area, the bars and clubs suck due to the bad economy, so not many people are going out around here.. Where are they? beats me.. And where are people looking? I have no clue..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2012 4:35 PM GMT

    My my my naughty naughty some of you!
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    Apr 19, 2012 4:45 PM GMT
    Jockbod48 saidI've never been without dates, and I'm older than most of you here. I've met guys in so many places - the current one right here on R.J. in Forums (a few years ago). Before that, here are some of the places that worked out for me:
    * In the gym or out running during my lunch hour.
    * Through other friends.
    * Through Rotary or my alumni association.
    * In my neighborhood - just by being friendly - cycling.
    * At Peet's or Starbucks.
    * A favorite: Outdoor cafes or lunch places where they'll let you have your dog with you. This is key! People will more easily speak to you if you have a dog (but is has to be a friendly looking dog - and a furry one is good too.) The dog is the ice breaker. If you have to - borrow a dog! Truly. This works!


    This varies considerably with location.

    No one has ever hit on me as I went about my normal life.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 19, 2012 4:48 PM GMT
    Jockbod48 saidI've never been without dates, and I'm older than most of you here. I've met guys in so many places - the current one right here on R.J. in Forums (a few years ago). Before that, here are some of the places that worked out for me:
    * In the gym or out running during my lunch hour.
    * Through other friends.
    * Through Rotary or my alumni association.
    * In my neighborhood - just by being friendly - cycling.
    * At Peet's or Starbucks.
    * A favorite: Outdoor cafes or lunch places where they'll let you have your dog with you. This is key! People will more easily speak to you if you have a dog (but is has to be a friendly looking dog - and a furry one is good too.) The dog is the ice breaker. If you have to - borrow a dog! Truly. This works!



    LOL!! So Gregg, if I want to meet new friends, I take my beagles to an
    outdoor cafe? Sounds interesting....

    icon_surprised.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2012 4:52 PM GMT
    I wish i knew where to find someone.



    I live in a town full of prudes or muggers.. And most people I have met are fake and liars to boot. Gee they can't all be the same. icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 20, 2012 7:31 AM GMT
    Webster666 saidCam4.com


    So you're that guy on cam who was...


    OMFG...







    lol. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 20, 2012 8:40 AM GMT
    Larkin said
    Jockbod48 saidI've never been without dates, and I'm older than most of you here. I've met guys in so many places - the current one right here on R.J. in Forums (a few years ago). Before that, here are some of the places that worked out for me:
    * In the gym or out running during my lunch hour.
    * Through other friends.
    * Through Rotary or my alumni association.
    * In my neighborhood - just by being friendly - cycling.
    * At Peet's or Starbucks.
    * A favorite: Outdoor cafes or lunch places where they'll let you have your dog with you. This is key! People will more easily speak to you if you have a dog (but is has to be a friendly looking dog - and a furry one is good too.) The dog is the ice breaker. If you have to - borrow a dog! Truly. This works!


    This varies considerably with location.

    No one has ever hit on me as I went about my normal life.


    Why the fudge would no one hit on you, you're fricking gorgeous!
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    Apr 20, 2012 9:43 AM GMT
    Well, I was interacting with people here on RJ - and I was led to believe those relationships were real - until another thread yesterday explained that this virtual world is not the same as real life...

    I am thinking of filing a law suit - sort of like I sued McDonald's because - how was I supposed to know fries would make me fat???

    I am devastated...

    icon_twisted.gif


    Here is the link to that thread...

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2312484


    Truthfully, I am uncertain in my current location where to meet people. No one hits on me in my normal life either - but that's OK. I am gradually working up the courage - I may become the instigator...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 20, 2012 12:57 PM GMT
    Try a new revolutionary way to meet guys
    Go outside and actually meet them somewhere. This way, you can see them, touch them, hear them, smell them, see their smile, body language, and make a decision.
    You may discover that you have to speak, put a sentence together, carry a conversation and show someone that you have a genuine sense of humor........in other words....show em what you are made of instead of hiding behind online correspondences and texts..

    Here's another brilliant idea..... phone numbers can be used for actual talking and speaking to one another, I know it's a frightening concept but speaking by phone may pay off.

    One real date who you hang with is a lot better than 50 hot online dating profiles and 1000 facebook "friends".

    For me, hearing and seeing a man's laugh is a lot more satisfying than "LOL" and "ROFL". An actual kiss is better than typing the emocion. But for other guys, the illusion of popularity and promise without actually having it or doing it is more important than reality.