Moodiness and/or a phase in mending my broken heart...

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    Jul 11, 2008 4:05 PM GMT
    I have to be upfront with anyone who reads these threads and stumbles on my opinions and tell you that though the point of view I've been stating for the last month or so have been mine, the attitude that I've spoken with has been as I see it, out of body.

    Ever since my break up with the love of my life I've been holding back a flood gate of volatile emotions so's not to destroy the only ex/bestfriend relationship I've ever had. And since this is totally unnatural for me cause I'm used to stating or showing my emotions clearly and constructively, I've been building up a lot of misplaced recentment and frustration. And only now having let some of my feeling out I've come to see what a jerk I've been in how I've expressed myself on this site lately. Sure, there are some things I said that I really meant and other things that were actually clear headed, but for the most part I'm sorry I offended anyone directly.

    Concidering my last 'good natured' post didn't make to the top of the boards I'm assuming this may also come to be ignored for the most part. But, nevertheless, I'm hoping someone will stumble upon it and understand where I'm now coming from.
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    Jul 11, 2008 4:20 PM GMT
    Aw, hell. Hugs, boiwunderkind...I think we all do that from time to time. We can't all be paragons of virtue and magnaminity all the time, no?
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    Jul 11, 2008 6:14 PM GMT
    You did disappear early this year biowunderkind, that left me wondering where you went to. icon_razz.gif You've been a bit curt with your posts lately but nothing really rude, so don't worry. I can be really snipish sometimes myself.

    Anyway, best of luck and glad you're on your way to recovering. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:09 PM GMT
    zdrew saidAw, hell. Hugs, boiwunderkind...I think we all do that from time to time. We can't all be paragons of virtue and magnaminity all the time, no?


    Thanks zdrew. I should really relax on myself sometimes. Although I do get far being a little intense :S And you're right, we all can't be perfect all time, but I'm still content with trying to be "ideal" as often as possible.. :!

    Oh yeah, changed my name after reading about some other guys kinky name change. RJ wouldn't let me be just "Q", so I had to go Epic; though I'm really more subdued in reality.
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:12 PM GMT
    Sedative saidYou did disappear early this year biowunderkind, that left me wondering where you went to. icon_razz.gif You've been a bit curt with your posts lately but nothing really rude, so don't worry. I can be really snipish sometimes myself.

    Anyway, best of luck and glad you're on your way to recovering. icon_biggrin.gif


    Woohoo! I love direct honest comments. Not too many people will tell me stuff like this, even when I've offended them[?]. I really appreciate it and oddly feel a sense of relief from that part of your comment.

    Thank you and I can't wait to be 100% again =D
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:17 PM GMT
    i don't really think there's a need to apologize for being human. it's the people on here who are INTENTIONALLY buttholes that should apologize.

    good luck working through it all!!!
    hogs and quiches!
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:28 PM GMT
    You're a bastard like me and you need to stand up and be proud of that you pathetic cock sucker. icon_lol.gif

    I'm going to slip out of my mean blunt bastard role to make a certain person on here happy and be nice for a second and tell you don't sweat it. You come off like a descent guy. Even nice guys have a moment. Your cool and sweet. I'd hug you right now and hump you to make you feel better.

    Back to being mean. Fuck off and have a terrible day. pass it on.
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:42 PM GMT
    Aha...gotcha sucka. Alpha's really just a little fuckin' pussy after all! icon_lol.gif

    To echo metroPAULitan, though...yeah, we're all human. Sometimes I fart butterflies, and sometimes I'm a walking douche with a capital D. The guys I get along with best in real life are the ones who can take my crap and sling it right back (or vice versa), let it all blow over, and not take any of it personally. Now that I think about it, some of my favorite people are ones I really disliked initially. I think it's cuz I have respect for people who are honest in their emotions and make no bones about being human, which entails occasionally being a punk-ass bitch. How odd is that?
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:46 PM GMT
    Epic_Q, you're human! It's ok, HOPEFULLY no one took/takes anything personally. I wouldn't worry about it!!

    BTW, hang in there, it'll get better!!
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:51 PM GMT
    zdrew saidAha...gotcha sucka. Alpha's really just a little fuckin' pussy after all! icon_lol.gif

    To echo metroPAULitan, though...yeah, we're all human. Sometimes I fart butterflies, and sometimes I'm a walking douche with a capital D. The guys I get along with best in real life are the ones who can take my crap and sling it right back (or vice versa), let it all blow over, and not take any of it personally. Now that I think about it, some of my favorite people are ones I really disliked initially. I think it's cuz I have respect for people who are honest in their emotions and make no bones about being human, which entails occasionally being a punk-ass bitch. How odd is that?


    Fuck off you hot bastard. I'm mean. I bite the heads off little kittens.
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    Jul 11, 2008 7:56 PM GMT
    Alpha62667 said
    zdrew saidAha...gotcha sucka. Alpha's really just a little fuckin' pussy after all! icon_lol.gif

    To echo metroPAULitan, though...yeah, we're all human. Sometimes I fart butterflies, and sometimes I'm a walking douche with a capital D. The guys I get along with best in real life are the ones who can take my crap and sling it right back (or vice versa), let it all blow over, and not take any of it personally. Now that I think about it, some of my favorite people are ones I really disliked initially. I think it's cuz I have respect for people who are honest in their emotions and make no bones about being human, which entails occasionally being a punk-ass bitch. How odd is that?


    Fuck off you hot bastard. I'm mean. I bite the heads off little kittens.


    Holy crap! If you guys trying to cheer me up it's working icon_biggrin.gif Now quit it. I'm still enjoying your previous replies. LOL xS
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    Jul 11, 2008 8:43 PM GMT
    Oh, f....errr...I mean...hell, I just got back from the gym. Gimme a sec to get back into RJ persona...


    ...okay. Hugs, butterfly kisses, and rainbow fuzzies to you all! Love ya love ya love ya YAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!


    I hope you're effin' feeling better now, Q, cuz I'm gonna go puke.







    icon_cool.gif
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    Jul 11, 2008 8:46 PM GMT
    zdrew saidOh, f....errr...I mean...hell, I just got back from the gym. Gimme a sec to get back into RJ persona...


    ...okay. Hugs, butterfly kisses, and rainbow fuzzies to you all! Love ya love ya love ya YAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!


    I hope you're effin' feeling better now, Q, cuz I'm gonna go puke.


    icon_cool.gif


    Aww, you're sick from being so sweet. You should post in the last thread about ** it'll make you feel better. Hell yeah.
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    Jul 11, 2008 8:50 PM GMT
    Coincidentally, I just did. And by the way, a couple of you here are my new personal heroes for the day. These f-bombs are therapeutic...I got called 'nice' and 'kind' about half a billion times in the latest ego-boost thread. It's flattering, but a little funny too...cuz I wouldn't have thought guys thought that of me.

    Let the puking continue.

    Oops. I think I just puked up a bunny.
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    Jul 11, 2008 8:53 PM GMT
    Well I can understand why breaking up with a guy who you had strong emotions for can make you moody. Being in a relationship has made me realize there are emotions in me I did not know I had (and neither did my partner after I lost my temper icon_redface.gif). Fortunately you have enough self-awareness to realize what is behind your moodiness. Not all guys are like that.
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    Jul 11, 2008 9:02 PM GMT
    JBE60 saidWell I can understand why breaking up with a guy who you had strong emotions for can make you moody. Being in a relationship has made me realize there are emotions in me I did not know I had (and neither did my partner after I lost my temper icon_redface.gif). Fortunately you have enough self-awareness to realize what is behind your moodiness. Not all guys are like that.


    Yeah my emotions can easily be strong or subtle. Learn that back in junior high when I beat my bully after I snapped(not my fingers). But the mostly the issue with my emotions is having to contain them away from him cause it doesn't make sense to be loving and warm to the degree or manner I used to do. It's repression that's got me all messed up.

    Honestly, I never had to much awareness of my emotions before this last relationship, where my emotions, mind and abilities flourished more than ever before. If I was like most people I know I'd turn these feeling towards drinking, or direct anger, but I'm the type to turn my destructiveness inward first. I don't like knowing I hurt someone when it wasn't neccessary. Unfortunately, I become detriment to myself until I let go again. Thankfully these guys and a couple others have helped me chillax today. It's worked wonders, believe me ;)
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    Jul 11, 2008 9:05 PM GMT
    Alpha62667 saidYou're a bastard like me and you need to stand up and be proud of that you pathetic cock sucker. icon_lol.gif

    I'm going to slip out of my mean blunt bastard role to make a certain person on here happy and be nice for a second and tell you don't sweat it. You come off like a descent guy. Even nice guys have a moment. Your cool and sweet. I'd hug you right now and hump you to make you feel better.

    Back to being mean. Fuck off and have a terrible day. pass it on.


    I think someone needs a hug.

  • SoDakGuy

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    Jul 11, 2008 9:06 PM GMT
    Hugs kiddo! My heart was broken earlier this year and I still miss him. He's still a wonderful guy, but we're too much alike and he held his angst towards me until it was too late.

    It does get better. I know right now if exceptionally hard right now, but it does get better.

    Hell, my hearts been broken so many times, you think I would be use to it by now.

    But I'm not. I have learned though to call friends (true friends) to chat or even go to the gym and lift to get your mind off things. Hell, even travelling to see a buddy of yours that's out of town helps immensely. It sure did for me! icon_smile.gif

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=4lFyTmQxgro