Could You Be Friends with Anti-Gay People

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 25, 2012 9:43 PM GMT
    There are people on this earth who don't believe in homosexuality, or gay marriage, gay adoption etc as we all know. That does not necessarily make them bad people, but I wonder...could you still be friends with those people as long as the topic did not come up, or as long as they did not force their opinion on you?

    Just because you have a different belief system does not mean you cannot get along or have other stuff in common right?

    Or do you feel like it is not right to be friends with someone who essentially does not want you to be happy in a sense?

    I am a Christian (despite what others say about being gay and being a Christian) and I can be friends with an Atheist as long as my beliefs are not insulted and i won't do the same in vice versa.

    So reguardless of the issue..can you be friends with those people, or would it be to painful for you?

    Or make you feel like a hypocrit even?
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    Mar 25, 2012 9:53 PM GMT
    JamieJfromtheA saidThere are people on this earth who don't believe in homosexuality, or gay marriage, gay adoption etc as we all know. That does not necessarily make them bad people, but I wonder...could you still be friends with those people as long as the topic did not come up, or as long as they did not force their opinion on you?

    Just because you have a different belief system does not mean you cannot get along or have other stuff in common right?

    Or do you feel like it is not right to be friends with someone who essentially does not want you to be happy in a sense?

    I am a Christian (despite what others say about being gay and being a Christian) and I can be friends with an Atheist as long as my beliefs are not insulted and i won't do the same in vice versa.

    So reguardless of the issue..can you be friends with those people, or would it be to painful for you?

    Or make you feel like a hypocrit even?


    Well... I know we live in the same state so we're used to a lot of people who are Anti-Gay

    I'm still in the closet so I deal with it a lot, especially with friends from work. I'm always really quick to shut them up and prove them wrong though. A lot of the hate comes from Biblical stuff so I'm quick to prove my point about it (I'm Atheist myself).

    So in short, yes. I have many friends who do not believe in homosexuality and that's fine. I can't say I respect that at all, but they're human and I can only hope that one day there minds will change. Sexuality (I think) is something so small and shouldn't define who we are, and so if that's something people choose NOT to like then I can't change that. Again, I'll lost a bit of respect points, but they're still my friends.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 25, 2012 10:36 PM GMT
    Life is to short to waste it on bigots.

    That means; "NO"
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:11 AM GMT
    Nor would I associate with anti-Semites.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:12 AM GMT
    But isnt saying no..means you cant be friends with people who disagree with you?
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:14 AM GMT
    JamieJfromtheA saidCould You Be Friends with Anti-Gay People
    Exchange in a civil and mild mannered dialogue, yes.

    Enjoy their company on a regular basis, no.
  • UVaRob9

    Posts: 282

    Mar 26, 2012 2:15 AM GMT
    JamieJfromtheA saidBut isnt saying no..means you cant be friends with people who disagree with you?


    It's saying that you can't be friends with people who see you as being someone less deserving of rights, which I think is perfectly fine as justification for telling them to fuck right off.
  • BlackBeltGuy

    Posts: 2609

    Mar 26, 2012 2:20 AM GMT
    yes, because there is a way to show them what a stereotype is not. Also what is not familiar is not something to fear.

    I see them at work everyday. EVERYDAY.
    Slowly, I have changed a lot of opinions and core beliefs on more than a handful of people.
    If that isn't good spiritual work I don't know what is.

    (((((hops off soapbox with a back tuck)))))


  • xKorix

    Posts: 607

    Mar 26, 2012 2:30 AM GMT
    JamieJfromtheA saidBut isnt saying no..means you cant be friends with people who disagree with you?


    No. Why would you make that connection? Why would you think just because I'm choosing not to be in relationships with people who disagree with me over the fact that, I think I deserve human rights but they don't, means I cannot be in ANY relationship where people disagree with me? A little black and white don't you think?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:31 AM GMT
    Friendship goes two ways.
    I'm willing. Are they?
  • BlackBeltGuy

    Posts: 2609

    Mar 26, 2012 2:32 AM GMT
    GAMRican saidFriendship goes two ways.
    I'm willing. Are they?


    that's right GAM..
  • safety43_mma1...

    Posts: 4251

    Mar 26, 2012 2:35 AM GMT
    hell no i have to agree life is too short to deal with ignorant people.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:36 AM GMT
    Could You Be Friends with Anti-Gay People

    No. They do harm to others. I may try to engage them, educate them, and persuade them, but friends with them never, while they hold such anti-social positions.

    Why should they be rewarded with my friendship, when they attack me and my gay community? What a spineless, cowering and subordinate worm that would make ME. I may engage them, but I will not befriend my sworn enemy. When they abandon their anti-gay hatred & prejudices, and accept the entire human community as equals and with equal respect, then I will consider their friendship. But not before.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:38 AM GMT
    do you get paid for posting so many questions ? icon_lol.gif

    to answer your question , NO, I do not want to associate with prejudice people. dealt with one for 8 months had enough for the rest of my life.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:39 AM GMT
    I would love to.

    But the reality is I wouldn't have the intellectual or emotional energy to maintain that friendship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:39 AM GMT
    wow you sure ask us a lot of questions.icon_confused.gif
  • disasterpiece

    Posts: 2991

    Mar 26, 2012 2:43 AM GMT
    They wouldn't deserve my friendship.
  • FredMG

    Posts: 988

    Mar 26, 2012 2:44 AM GMT
    I'd say the answer is "NO, I would never try and start up or maintain a friendship with anyone who's anti-gay"
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Mar 26, 2012 2:44 AM GMT
    I'm sure I have clients who are anti-gay, but they aren't my friends.
    It would be difficult to be a friend to someone like this... but if they are "anti gay", they probably have a whole host of issues about "hate" and the like.
    Probably would rather avoid them and their problems.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:44 AM GMT
    I could be civil, but not friends. I don't get to spend enough time with people who actually care about me, why would I waste it on someone who doesn't?

    I do agree with what was said about breaking stereotypes... the only way peoples' opinion will change is by first-hand experience with people that don't reflect their flawed beliefs. But I wouldn't elevate someone to the category of "friend" until/unless they'd already had that epiphany.

    The difference between this and having friends with whom you disagree about religion or politics is that those are abstract things and -- unless they are themselves in a position of power -- their opinion doesn't hurt people, whereas if someone outspokenly was anti-gay, or sexist, or racist, I wouldn't want anything to do with them. But chances are I would probably not be close friends with someone whose opinions on abstract matters were so different from my own anyway, because what would we have in common? People's politics and morality help shape how they treat others or think they should be treated. Just because it doesn't affect me personally doesn't mean I'd be okay with it.
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:56 AM GMT
    I am friends with many anti gay people, but its to show them that I am a person, I am an individualicon_biggrin.gif with the same wants, needs, and goals as they have, and when they find out I am gay, maybe that small perspective they have in their mind about how a gay man is a sex crazed petoifeliac maniac out to sleep with as many men and boys as they can. It puts a little into perspective for them, and maybe they will one day realize well, "Jeff wasn't like that, so maybe I am being wrong". You lead by example, and show others there is hope. icon_smile.gif
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    Mar 26, 2012 2:58 AM GMT
    graphicabc saiddo you get paid for posting so many questions ? icon_lol.gif

    to answer your question , NO, I do not want to associate with prejudice people. dealt with one for 8 months had enough for the rest of my life.


    I wish but I wonder alot of stuff, Im a new out guy..so I just have so much to ask. I feel like a new world is out there now..so forgive meicon_biggrin.gif

    I could be/have been friends with an Anti gay because before I was out and dealt with my feelings , I thought gay was wrong..truth be told alot of us did. That is one of the reasons we have it so hard because our initial ideas of gay and stuff, but then when we realize how we feel, and realize it's not so simple, but for those who havent dealt with it personally can you really blame them for how they feel(especially if they are religious). They feel in their mind they are right, because of what they believe.

    but isn't the idea is to love people and be friends reguardless of our differences.

    I mean just because someone does not support gay rights does not mean they hate gay people. Anti-Gay does not mean hate.

    but I do see why people would be against it.
    I am not saying those who don't are wrong by any means.

    Just wondering if people was for or against it.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2012 3:00 AM GMT
    I wouldn't want to be friends with them. But like the OP said, not all anti-gay people are bad people.
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    Mar 26, 2012 3:01 AM GMT
    GAMRican saidFriendship goes two ways.
    I'm willing. Are they?


    My best friend is hardcore Christian and doesn't believe in anything associated with homosexuality but then I don't agree with many of the things he says and does either. You can't judge and expect not to be judged as well.
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    Mar 26, 2012 3:01 AM GMT
    i have two anti gay friends but funny thing is they know im gay and dont seem to mind iticon_neutral.gif