Gay Slut Phase

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 7:25 AM GMT
    So a few weeks ago, I was getting pretty serious with this guy. He was a couple years older than me, and a virgin when we met. So we slept together, shortly thereafter, the relationship falls apart, he calls me several times to show interest in hanging out and rekindling what we had, then ditches me to hang out with other guys.

    On top of stringing me along, he comes into my work at the adult toy store and needs a butt plug, "oh and what was that great lube we used to use?" he would never let me fuck him when we were together but now he's taking it for other guys? I feel totally played.

    doesn't he know that he's kinda hurting me by hanging around and not following through on any of his advances? Is he fucking with me or is he just that emotionally immature? I remember when i lost my virginity, going through a bit of a slut phase myself, calming down after a while.

    So what do we think of his behavior? Am i being oversensitive? Does he know he's being a dick? Should his behavior be accepted as normal considering his newly revoked v-card?
  • Muscle_Guy78

    Posts: 40

    Mar 31, 2012 7:32 AM GMT
    He doesn't sound worth worrying about. He's definitely trying to flaunt something with you in the store, that he's attractive, having sex etc. Don't pander to his ego by showing he's affecting you, I would say.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 7:59 AM GMT
    Glenn1388 said
    On top of stringing me along, he comes into my work at the adult toy store and needs a butt plug...


    Dear Penthouse forum...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 8:21 AM GMT
    ha ha ariodante. people always dont believe me about my job. i promise i'm not trolling for comments or anything. just tellin it like it is.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 10:23 AM GMT
    Ariodante said
    Glenn1388 said
    On top of stringing me along, he comes into my work at the adult toy store and needs a butt plug...


    Dear Penthouse forum...


    LOL
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 11:23 AM GMT
    Glenn1388 saidSo a few weeks ago, I was getting pretty serious with this guy. He was a couple years older than me, and a virgin when we met. So we slept together, shortly thereafter, the relationship falls apart, he calls me several times to show interest in hanging out and rekindling what we had, then ditches me to hang out with other guys.

    On top of stringing me along, he comes into my work at the adult toy store and needs a butt plug, "oh and what was that great lube we used to use?" he would never let me fuck him when we were together but now he's taking it for other guys? I feel totally played.

    doesn't he know that he's kinda hurting me by hanging around and not following through on any of his advances? Is he fucking with me or is he just that emotionally immature? I remember when i lost my virginity, going through a bit of a slut phase myself, calming down after a while.

    So what do we think of his behavior? Am i being oversensitive? Does he know he's being a dick? Should his behavior be accepted as normal considering his newly revoked v-card?


    Whatever his reasons, you're lucky you are not more closely involved with him right now. He emotionally clueless and it's not surprising you're feeling hurt. Be polite but distant till he figures out that his new-found sexuality is not the most important thing in the world.
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Mar 31, 2012 11:25 AM GMT
    Sounds like sex wasn't good for himicon_idea.gif
  • Buddha

    Posts: 1767

    Mar 31, 2012 12:18 PM GMT
    You're very young, when you get to my age you'll see it a whole new light.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 12:23 PM GMT
    Muscle_Guy78 saidHe doesn't sound worth worrying about. He's definitely trying to flaunt something with you in the store, that he's attractive, having sex etc. Don't pander to his ego by showing he's affecting you, I would say.


    I agree..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 1:03 PM GMT
    He's too much of a dick to know he's a dick...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 1:08 PM GMT
    TallsdDude saidHe's too much of a dick to know he's a dick...


    x 100

    Move on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 1:10 PM GMT
    IMO - I think you should just treat him as any other customer if he comes into the store and otherwise ignore him. He's obvious not worth any more of your time or energy.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Mar 31, 2012 1:22 PM GMT
    Where else do you go if you need a "butt plug"?

  • araphael

    Posts: 1148

    Mar 31, 2012 2:02 PM GMT
    Is there really such a thing as a gay slut phase? Damn, how did I miss that phase? I wish I had expereinced that part of the journey. I'm always missing out on stuff dammit!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 2:10 PM GMT
    If you want to be evil, bring some cayenne pepper into the store and have it handy for his next purchase. icon_biggrin.gif

    Muscle_Guy78 saidHe doesn't sound worth worrying about. He's definitely trying to flaunt something with you in the store, that he's attractive, having sex etc. Don't pander to his ego by showing he's affecting you, I would say.


    Otherwise, this seems about right. ^^
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 2:23 PM GMT
    Muscle_Guy78 saidHe doesn't sound worth worrying about. He's definitely trying to flaunt something with you in the store, that he's attractive, having sex etc. Don't pander to his ego by showing he's affecting you, I would say.


    Just move on and act like you would in front of any other customer. If he wants to hang out tell him you are busy. He is surely playing you and keeping an option open just in case. Do you really want to be that last option.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 5:35 PM GMT
    He's definitely playing with you.

    OR

    Maybe he never really took you seriously to begin with. I'm not trying to be an ass by saying this, but maybe the fact that you work in an adult store, he thinks that all you are is about sex and playing around.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 6:29 PM GMT
    araphael saidIs there really such a thing as a gay slut phase?

    There can be, but doesn't have to happen. In my case it was a result of my coming out very late, so somewhat atypical of most gay men.

    Once I tasted gay sex my horny/sluttiness level went through the roof. Something I had totally missed as a teenager and beyond, I assume because being in denial I wouldn't consider sex with men, and women didn't interest me, so I had no strong sexual desires or outlets, merely an undefined inner frustration. And even when I talked myself into dating women to placate my family, and even marrying, there was no deep passion there, not like I was now experiencing.

    As a newly-out gay man I couldn't get enough sex, as though a bound-up spring had been released, all those years I missed suddenly bursting out all at once. Now at last I began to understand what male randiness was is about, what I'd been missing, something I'd thought was just exaggeration, as I began my own wild ride.

    Yet even in the middle of it I guessed what was happening to me, a reaction to my years of denial, and figured it wouldn't last forever, that I would idle back to normal activity levels in about a year or so as my appetite was sated and the novelty wore off. But I wouldn't fight it, rather enjoying it to the max while it lasted.

    And that's exactly how it went. Hyper slutty for the first 6 months, then tapering off for the next 6, and finally leveling out to behave like my gay contemporaries at about the 12 month mark. Yet even so, still hornier than I'd been when living straight, just that now I was on a par with other gay men. And loving it! icon_biggrin.gif

  • Mar 31, 2012 6:43 PM GMT
    He's not ready to settle down. It may be because he wants to explore, or because he's not emotionally ready for a relationship. Be friendly with him, but you're obviously looking for something more substantial, so don't spend too much time thinking about him. Move on to someone else.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 7:05 PM GMT
    Wait.....You are sexually liberated enough to work in an adult bookstore but can't wrap your mind around the demise of a recreational sex relationship?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 7:22 PM GMT
    Glenn1388 saidha ha ariodante. people always dont believe me about my job. i promise i'm not trolling for comments or anything. just tellin it like it is.


    I also worked in an adult store.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2012 7:59 PM GMT
    I alawyas say communication is the key to most problems but most people don't want to go that route becasue there can be confrontations and arguements, but that's the way communication works. It can't all be Mr. Roger's Neighborhood all the time.

    Tell him how you feel and ask him if he needs some time to expereince the gay world before being more serious about dating a single person and if he is actually a nice guy you may want to just be friends and be there ot help him through things since there isn't really a manual for this.

    Speaking as one who supports relationships but finds the whole monagamy thing to be a load of crap, I'm less worried about taht as long as everyone is clear on it. I would say he is definately not ready for a relationship if he is just getting a grip on his newly discovered sexuality. But, communicate thsi with him. Standing behind the counter and being quietly hurt sin't really solving anything and neither will ignoring him since he is likely oblivious to what he is doing...just don't ahve the conversation at work.
  • Beeftastic

    Posts: 1747

    Mar 31, 2012 8:24 PM GMT
    Ok, so you meet and date a virgin. You have sex. He finds out he likes it. He starts to see other guys and explore his sexuality. You are hurt that he is continuing to do what you started, but without you.

    Give the guy a break. As you say he is older, so he probably has lost time to make up for.

    You say: " I remember when i lost my virginity, going through a bit of a slut phase myself,"

    Why are you applying a higher standard to him, then to YOU? Hypocrite!

    Let the guy figure it out for himself, it might take a while. If you like him, don't you want what is best for him? You can't predict what might happen to a virgin, and neither could he.

    Seriously, you shouldn't be all butthurt over all of this. Just be his friend.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 02, 2012 1:43 AM GMT
    araphael saidIs there really such a thing as a gay slut phase? Damn, how did I miss that phase? I wish I had expereinced that part of the journey. I'm always missing out on stuff dammit!


    +1
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 02, 2012 2:01 AM GMT
    See that cute guy, over there in the corner, looking at nipple clamps? Mmhmm, your next boyfriend. Frollick yonder, jubilant creature, go forth and make love in the field!