Is flirting bad on a first date / meet up?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 01, 2012 5:58 AM GMT
    So, I'm curious. Is it good or bad to flirt when you first meet a guy? Like I have met these two guys before (one of them I am interested in seeing if a relationship is possible) but the two have told me that they see me as a good friend / "bro". So at first I was glad that I made a good impression on them and that I wasn't a weirdo icon_lol.gif

    However, it soon dawned on me that one of the guys I wish I kind of flirted with him. Since it was our first time meeting and talking I was nervous about whether I should flirt with him or not and if he would take it in the wrong way. He was shy (more shy than me), so I thought that flirting would make him more shy and not want to talk to me, but on the other hand I now think that it could make him a bit more confident to talk to me more since he knows I'm interested in him. The two of us still talk from time to time.

    So here are my questions:

    1) For future references, is it good to flirt on a first meet?

    2) So when I meet with this guy again (he is coming home from college soon), should I flirt with him the next time (even if he is still a bit shy)?

    Thanks guys.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 01, 2012 6:49 AM GMT
    I think you have to assess the situation. If you flirt with them and they are clearly uncomfortable than scale it back or stop it.

    I usually start really really light and if they are responsive I'll keep going.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 01, 2012 2:58 PM GMT
    Why not flirt. Show him your interested. Or if he is flirting with YOU, thats a good sign too.

    But if he is flirting with other dudes (or heck, even chicks...) that is bad sign. ( this crap has happened to me!) icon_smile.gificon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 01, 2012 3:05 PM GMT
    hell yeah you flirt on the first date, i flirt on the first second of meeting a guy.
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    Apr 01, 2012 3:51 PM GMT
    Flirt on the first date to show him you're interested. He agreed to meeting you for the date so why not reciprocate by flirting a bit? If he flirts back that's a very good sign.

    And definitely flirt it up on the second date. It's not only that you're flirting it's how you're flirting on the initial dates- very important to send clear signals of interest and not being hard to read.

    Just make sure it's a date and not a friendly meeting as sometime guys while put you in the friend zone if they don't think you're a good match and you won't realize you see him flirting with his new dates. Happened to me once before icon_confused.gif
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Apr 01, 2012 6:06 PM GMT
    WTF!?

    Why are you on the first date? To demonstrate your knowledge of quantum physics?
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    Apr 01, 2012 6:26 PM GMT
    What do you mean with flirting? Like making intensive eye contact or something?

    Is making jokes about them (in a positive playful manner ofc) flirting? In that case i'm doing it constantly icon_lol.gif (so also on first meet)

    I feeel as a result of that, I have a tendancy to unwillingly immediately place new guys that I meet in the "friend zone". I think i'm very bad at this. I very easily befriend new guys, but taking it a step further makes me feel a little uncomfortable...
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    Apr 01, 2012 6:28 PM GMT
    LJay saidWTF!?

    Why are you on the first date? To demonstrate your knowledge of quantum physics?

    +1