Boyfriend driving cross-country alone, should I worry? Anyone done this? I'm freaking a little

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    Apr 06, 2012 6:33 PM GMT
    My boyfriend is driving from Minnesota to California. He left early this morning. He is driving alone. My preference was that he drive no more than 8-9 hours a day and stay at hotels (for which I offered to splits costs) and arrive on Monday or Tuesday, but for whatever reason he insists on being here by Easter Sunday. He says he will be fine "pulling over" and resting "a few hours" and then continuing on. icon_eek.gif

    I did the drive to from Illinois to Cali when I was in college with two frat buddies. I met many decent people, but I also encountered freaks and weirdos out there in the desolation/isolation -- a fun adventure when you're with the fellas but I shudder to think what might have happened were I alone at that age. I also know it is easy to sleepily zone out on those hypnotic stretches of open road.

    When we're together I can typically whine, threaten, and complain until he makes good decisions (i.e. caves in), but there is nothing I can do about this. Which he knows, and is enjoying. Should I push the issue or leave it alone? Has anyone driven cross-country alone before? Did you drive straight through?

    P.S. If anybody is a resident of Nebraska, Colorado, Utah, or Nevada, is not a serial killer, and would put up a knucklehead for the night, please let me know.

    *commence deep breathing/relaxation exercises*
  • Hulse15

    Posts: 121

    Apr 06, 2012 7:14 PM GMT
    Hey! My boyfriend is driving from NY to Florida right now, so I know how you feel!! However, he IS smart enough to pull over if he gets tired and rest. It's a little nerve racking I know! Do you guys have iphone? There's an app called find my friend which we both have. It shows you where exactly the person is.

    It's good to see where he is on a long trip like that!

    Just remember to breathe....

    icon_smile.gif
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:22 PM GMT
    Damn I wish I could spend time time with your bf during his pit stops ;)
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:22 PM GMT
    JPtheBITCH saidRunning11 is a cute guy, and he seems very nice. I hope you're happy together.


    He's alright I guess. icon_wink.gif Thanks.
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:26 PM GMT
    Hulse15 saidIt's a little nerve racking I know!


    To say the least. I remember the look on my parents' face when I told them I was driving cross-country. Didn't get it at the time. Now I get it.
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:33 PM GMT
    I've driven about 900,000 miles in 34 years. This includes several long distance trips, both alone and with others. Credit cards, cell phones, GPS, iPod, Starbucks locator make trips more enjoyable.

    But he needs good rest to drive safely. If he's a heavy sleeper, then rest areas are fine. I personally find it better to stretch out in a bed for a good night's rest. Alertness on the road is essential.
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:42 PM GMT
    White4DarkerFL saidBut he needs good rest to drive safely. If he's a heavy sleeper, then rest areas are fine. I personally find it better to stretch out in a bed for a good night's rest. Alertness on the road is essential.


    I knew it. I knew it.

    I'm going to call right away and nag him about it. This rest area thing isn't working for me.
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:44 PM GMT
    Depends on his age, his experience with driving long distances, and his knowledge of how to choose good places to pull over for food, gas & lodging. It's not that difficult or dangerous in the 21st-Century US, but some foreknowledge raises the comfort & safety levels, and can save some money.

    I've driven solo across the US, literally from one end to the other, both from the Atlantic to the Pacific coasts, and from the Gulf to the border of Canada. Sometimes by car, sometimes by motorcycle.

    In fact, my longest solo trip was by motorcycle, from Key West, Florida to Seattle, Washington, the greatest distance you can travel in the contiguous 48 States, a total of 4800 miles (I took some scenic detours).

    So if this gay guy can do it, and at ages that I assume were much older than your BF, then he can do it, too. I just wish I had known this sooner, I might have had some tips for him. But he'll be OK. My own Mother's epic solo car trips clear across the US 70 years ago put my own travel to shame, turn my travels into cakewalks. Your BF will be just fine. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:55 PM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    So if this gay guy can do it, and at ages that I assume were much older than your BF, then he can do it, too. I just wish I had known this sooner, I might have had some tips for him.


    Not too late for tips, please share.

    I'm really terrified of him being Matthew Shephard-ed by a group of thugs. I'm very much opposed to this sleeping at rest stops business. Why do people younger than 25 think they're invincible?
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    Apr 06, 2012 7:57 PM GMT
    southbeach1500 saidHe can fly from MSP to LAX for $250 on US Airways on Easter Sunday, which is probably less than what he'll pay in gas.


    Yes, but he's moving here and wants his car and his stuff. Also his stuff is piled in the car and he can't see out the back, he really should have rented a U-Haul trailer I kept telling him that.

    P.S. I appreciate how difficult it must have been for you to not reference the President when you brought up gas prices. *golf clap on your self-control*
  • Pontifex

    Posts: 1882

    Apr 06, 2012 8:03 PM GMT
    I do solo big road trips all the time. I've never run into trouble. I always stop at hotels though and know when I need to stop.

    Hopefully he has good judgement and can tell when he needs a rest. It really isn't that hard to drive for 16 hours straight(gay?) if you have something to keep you entertained, take breaks once in a while and are capable of concentrating.
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    Apr 06, 2012 8:06 PM GMT
    Cross country alone? Been doing it all my adult life. Drive 20 sleep 4 then do it again..

    Leave L.A. on friday afternoon, arrive NYC sunday eve!

    A little slower as I age, but always drive hard!
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    Apr 06, 2012 8:07 PM GMT
    TroyAthlete said
    P.S. I appreciate how difficult it must have been for you to not reference the President when you brought up gas prices. *golf clap on your self-control*
    I LOVE it! Now that is funny!icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_cool.gificon_cool.gificon_cool.gificon_cool.gif
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    Apr 06, 2012 9:31 PM GMT
    TropicalMark saidCross country alone? Been doing it all my adult life. Drive 20 sleep 4 then do it again..

    Leave L.A. on friday afternoon, arrive NYC sunday eve!

    A little slower as I age, but always drive hard!


    icon_eek.gif

    120924_o.gif
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    Apr 06, 2012 9:36 PM GMT
    I drove across the country alone several times when I was in my 20's. Didn't have any money for motels. Usually, I'd drive about 16 or 20 hours a day and catch a nap in the cab of the pickup. Or roll underneath if it was warm and dry. I also had a few relatives scattered along the way that I could sometimes drop in on. Never really had any problem. Except...

    One time the pickup died in the middle of the Dakota Badlands. No shade for miles and no telephone for even more miles. After a couple of hours, some really rough looking guys on beat-up Harleys passed, then circled back and stopped. Just like in one of those movies... icon_eek.gif

    They took a look at the problem then waited until their sag-wagon came along - which happened to be pulling a trailer with a complete mechanic shop inside. They fixed up my truck, gave me a cold beer and roared off into the distance. icon_razz.gif
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    Apr 06, 2012 10:00 PM GMT
    I've criss-crossed Canada and the US many many times most only my motorbike as well as driving a 28 foot Uhaul truck hauling my car on a trailer behind. All of it without a GPS or phone (gps). Although I have one now. It's an adventure and really there's nothing to worry about. There are very few places anymore that you would have to worry about running out of gas, finding a safe place to pull over and snooze or getting a Super 8 etc for the night.
    Only once in all my years did that happen. I'd been driving all day and figured on spending the night in Bimidji MN. I got there about 10pm and I don' t know what the hell was going on in town but there was not one single solitary room available in town, not one. So I just headed out on the highway and drove about 25 minutes west on hiway 2 and came across one of those ancient old motels sort of in the middle of nowhere near Bagley). It was a little creepy I'll admit but it was fine.
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    Apr 07, 2012 2:30 AM GMT
    beneful1 said
    Only once in all my years did that happen. I'd been driving all day and figured on spending the night in Bimidji MN. I got there about 10pm and I don' t know what the hell was going on in town but there was not one single solitary room available in town, not one. So I just headed out on the highway and drove about 25 minutes west on hiway 2 and came across one of those ancient old motels sort of in the middle of nowhere near Bagley). It was a little creepy I'll admit but it was fine.


    Yikes, I know exactly where that is. Sounds like the beginning of a slasher flick:

    "You ain't gonna find no rooms in this town tonight, stranger. But there used to be an old place 'bout twenty minutes up the road out yonder near Bagley. Course, most folks don't head up that way no more. Not since...well...maybe you oughtta try to make on to Grand Forks, huh?"

    My boyfriend is just now entering Colorado. I got him a hotel in Denver for the night. 2.5 hours, he should be good and I can rest. I haven't been able to accomplish anything today. icon_sad.gif
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    Apr 07, 2012 2:59 AM GMT
    TroyAthlete saidMy boyfriend is driving from Minnesota to California. He left early this morning. He is driving alone. My preference was that he drive no more than 8-9 hours a day and stay at hotels (for which I offered to splits costs) and arrive on Monday or Tuesday, but for whatever reason he insists on being here by Easter Sunday. He says he will be fine "pulling over" and resting "a few hours" and then continuing on. icon_eek.gif

    I did the drive to from Illinois to Cali when I was in college with two frat buddies. I met many decent people, but I also encountered freaks and weirdos out there in the desolation/isolation -- a fun adventure when you're with the fellas but I shudder to think what might have happened were I alone at that age. I also know it is easy to sleepily zone out on those hypnotic stretches of open road.

    When we're together I can typically whine, threaten, and complain until he makes good decisions (i.e. caves in), but there is nothing I can do about this. Which he knows, and is enjoying. Should I push the issue or leave it alone? Has anyone driven cross-country alone before? Did you drive straight through?

    P.S. If anybody is a resident of Nebraska, Colorado, Utah, or Nevada, is not a serial killer, and would put up a knucklehead for the night, please let me know.

    *commence deep breathing/relaxation exercises*


    I’ve done it 45 – 50 times over my life. There are few things I love more than the open road. Nothing much to worry about, assuming that if he does get sleepy, pull over and nap for 30 minutes. Nothing worse than fighting the head bobbing as you start to sleep. Nothing will prevent it either other than getting some exercise or pulling over for a nap.

    I’ve done almost straight through before and usually in the winter time when I was trying to get back here for Christmas. I’ve left LA heading east on I-40, hit bad weather in Fagstaff and was snowed in until morning. Then I will admit that I’ve done the other 1,800 miles to Columbus straight through and a few times in terrible weather. Nothing like 35 hours behind the wheel. I don’t do that anymore and most of the reason is that I’m self employed and can pretty much do what I want, when I want so I get off of the interstates and take the two-lanes. If it takes me three days, fine or five days, fine. There’s nothing to see on the interstates because remember that they put these through where it was easiest to do so.

    I wouldn’t worry about it much other than if you’re tired you usually won’t drive yourself out of it unless you nap or go workout someplace.
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    Apr 07, 2012 3:01 AM GMT
    JPtheBITCH saidI drove from Detroit to L.A. with a friend many years ago. We did it way too fast; it is easy to get zonked on those long empty stretches of highway.

    But you know that nagging him will do no good. Cross your fingers, pray if that's your thing, distract yourself, and Easter morning he will show up on your doorstep.

    And good luck to you guys. Running11 is a cute guy, and he seems very nice. I hope you're happy together.


    "We did it way too fast"

    one of the best reason to do it. Take electronic countermeasures though.

    http://www.escortradar.com/passport9500ix-details.php

    https://www.escortradar.com/store/laser-shifter-zr4.html
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    Apr 07, 2012 3:03 AM GMT
    yourname2000 said
    mindgarden saidI drove across the country alone several times when I was in my 20's. Didn't have any money for motels. Usually, I'd drive about 16 or 20 hours a day and catch a nap in the cab of the pickup. Or roll underneath if it was warm and dry. I also had a few relatives scattered along the way that I could sometimes drop in on. Never really had any problem. Except...

    One time the pickup died in the middle of the Dakota Badlands. No shade for miles and no telephone for even more miles. After a couple of hours, some really rough looking guys on beat-up Harleys passed, then circled back and stopped. Just like in one of those movies... icon_eek.gif

    They took a look at the problem then waited until their sag-wagon came along - which happened to be pulling a trailer with a complete mechanic shop inside. They fixed up my truck, gave me a cold beer and roared off into the distance. icon_razz.gif

    There's a porno script in there somewhere. icon_twisted.gif
    Yup.. we met in a rest area and had awesome sex!
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    Apr 07, 2012 3:04 AM GMT
    southbeach1500 saidHe can fly from MSP to LAX for $250 on US Airways on Easter Sunday, which is probably less than what he'll pay in gas.


    WAY too much to see that many miss for their entire life. I fly too much anyway so a road trip is a very welcome break.
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    Apr 07, 2012 3:24 AM GMT
    Awwhh... the softer, vulnerable side of Troy... He'll be fine man. As for stopping along the way, tell him to pull over into a hotel parkinglot and sleep there versus the side of the road or a rest stop. Good luck.
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    Apr 07, 2012 3:40 AM GMT
    Tell him to get off of I-70 in Cisco, a hundred or so miles west of Grand Junction, CO and follow 128 south west to Moab, UT, then take 191 south to Blanding and then 95 up to Hanksville. Then 24 to Torrey then 12 up to through the back of Bryce.

    This is one of the world’s most beautiful drives in the world and well worth the extra day or so. And where I shot most of this. This was early Feb. two years ago



    Spring is magical in southern Utah.

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    Apr 07, 2012 4:03 AM GMT
    You should totally be worried. With all the retired people, texters, and all all-around stupid drivers, there's a whole world of shit he could get himself into. He might even get his door scratched in a parking lot! icon_eek.gif
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    Apr 07, 2012 4:06 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidYou should totally be worried. With all the retired people, texters, and all all-around stupid drivers, there's a whole world of shit he could get himself into. He might even get his door scratched in a parking lot! icon_eek.gif


    Get off on some of the two lanes and you won't even see another car for an hour or so.