Given an option

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    Apr 09, 2012 12:01 AM GMT
    I was given 2 options from this guy. He basically told me the following:

    1) Be friends and forget any kind of possible romance in the future
    2) Say goodbye and move on

    Well I simply ignored his options. I am wondering how can anyone at the start of a relationship, it being friendship to start off would put such limits and completely ignore the other persons wants/dislikes? I think what he did was very selfish and closed all doors.

    Is this something you would do?
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:06 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI was given 2 options from this guy. He basically told me the following:

    1) Be friends and forget any kind of possible romance in the future
    2) Say goodbye and move on

    Well I simply ignored his options. I am wondering how can anyone at the start of a relationship, it being friendship to start off would put such limits and completely ignore the other persons wants/dislikes? I think what he did was very selfish and closed all doors.

    Is this something you would do?
    He actually was quite clear.. he does not want any type of romantic/sexual relationship by you or possibly anyone else. Those are his 'wants'.icon_wink.gif
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:10 AM GMT
    I understand but he wants a friendship but at the same time, talks dirty to me. I just don't get it icon_question.gif

    I have told him, I have no problem being friends but he keeps making sexual passes at me in his conversation and yet just wants a friendship.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:22 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI understand but he wants a friendship but at the same time, talks dirty to me. I just don't get it icon_question.gif

    I have told him, I have no problem being friends but he keeps making sexual passes at me in his conversation and yet just wants a friendship.
    LOL then run! The dude has serious issues!
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:31 AM GMT
    I did.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:33 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI did.
    Whew! You'll be alot better off! Thankfully you didnt get all caught up in its web!
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:37 AM GMT
    The similarities with my past x was so much alike, even he started calling me an F and then presenting me with the options.
    It scared me shit and I thought no way I am going to get caught up in this shit, no one puts limits on me or tells me to F off.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:39 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidThe similarities with my past x was so much alike, even he started calling me an F and then presenting me with the options.
    It scared me shit and I thought no way I am going to get caught up in this shit, no one puts limits on me or tells me to F off.
    LOL.. isnt it funny when we seem to be attracted to the same types that cause us such grief? I'm attempting to change that but it isnt easy! Maybe i should just date a hard core right winger.. Thats a 'change' from what my 'norm' is!
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:44 AM GMT
    I know, it is not me searching for them, they just come to me. Now i know better. Thanks to my X for teaching me how to avoid vampires.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:47 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI know, it is not me searching for them, they just come to me. Now i know better. Thanks to my X for teaching me how to avoid vampires.
    It took me awhile to realize that! I seem to attract the same losers too!
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:53 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI understand but he wants a friendship but at the same time, talks dirty to me. I just don't get it icon_question.gif

    I have told him, I have no problem being friends but he keeps making sexual passes at me in his conversation and yet just wants a friendship.

    I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. If I were in your place, I'd say, fine, let's just be friends. Then I would be aloof and not make much time for him. If you do spend time with him, I would completely ignore his sexual passes, maybe tell him it is not appropriate to do that between friends.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:55 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI did.



    Good. Sometimes you can find the obvious answer just by reading your own posts as if they were written by someone else.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:57 AM GMT
    socalfitness said
    graphicabc saidI understand but he wants a friendship but at the same time, talks dirty to me. I just don't get it icon_question.gif

    I have told him, I have no problem being friends but he keeps making sexual passes at me in his conversation and yet just wants a friendship.

    I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. If I were in your place, I'd say, fine, let's just be friends. Then I would be aloof and not make much time for him. If you do spend time with him, I would completely ignore his sexual passes, maybe tell him it is not appropriate to do that between friends.


    I told him once, but he repeated it again, his excuses were, sorry, or i was drunk. Not worth my time, too many good guys out there, better alone than in bad company.
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    Apr 09, 2012 12:58 AM GMT
    take option #2...don't waste your time, the guy has his own issues
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    Apr 09, 2012 1:02 AM GMT
    graphicabc saidI understand but he wants a friendship but at the same time, talks dirty to me. I just don't get it icon_question.gif

    I have told him, I have no problem being friends but he keeps making sexual passes at me in his conversation and yet just wants a friendship.


    I have a "straight" friend that pulled this crap on me for months. Now I call him a prick teaser any time he makes sexual comments. He doesn't like getting called on the carpet and knocks it off. For a while at least.