"Straight" Guys

  • xandercs

    Posts: 5

    Apr 13, 2012 11:26 PM GMT
    I'd like to start off by saying I'm by no means a gay who says "I hate flamers" or anything like that... but I will say when it comes to my ideal partner it is someone who is completely masculine, or "straight" acting

    BUT, hardly anything frustrates me more than my interactions with guys who claim they are "straight" but are looking to get together with gay men. Just had a guy who i hung out with a couple times who just told me today he had a girlfriend and that he told her everything and we can't hangout anymore.

    I suppose shame on me for hanging out with someone who didn't identify as gay and expecting it to go anywhere (even a friendship).

    I was wondering if anyone else had encounters with guys who said they were straight or just curious and how they ended up, whether they "turned" gay or were just a fwb or one time hookup or are just friends.. or any other comments related to the matter
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13999

    Apr 14, 2012 12:28 AM GMT
    Spaghetti is straight until you boil it.
  • chi_rock

    Posts: 207

    Apr 14, 2012 2:01 AM GMT
    It sometimes takes time to form your own identity. Patience is required. Be true to yourself at all times.
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    Apr 14, 2012 2:08 AM GMT
    My straight friends are genuinely straight... It also helps that I'm not attracted to them at all.
  • tim_id

    Posts: 43

    Apr 14, 2012 2:15 AM GMT
    Timbales saidSpaghetti is straight until you boil it.

    hahaha. That's hilarious!
  • xandercs

    Posts: 5

    Apr 14, 2012 7:15 PM GMT
    yourname2000At the root of the problem, imo, is the incorrect assumption that gay guys can't be as masculine (whatever that word means to you) as any straight guy. That's just bullshit. But maybe you and your imaginary straight BF have that internalized homophobia in common: maybe that's what's keeping him in the closet and you thinking that's the best guy you'll ever get.

    Just to clarify, I don't assume that gay men can't be as masculine if not more masculine than straight men. The guy in my story was much "gayer" than me. But that kind of masculinity is definitely something harder to find among gay men, one because they don't stick out as gay so they are easily passed up, and second, 95% of the time they're heterosexual.