LONG DISTANCE LOVERS

  • VOLCANOMYTE

    Posts: 13

    Apr 17, 2012 12:27 AM GMT
    mensagens-para-namorado-mora-longe.jpg

    What is the problem?
    Every time I meet a guy who makes my heart beat faster, which I feel like staying with him all the time and lie on his chest exchanging caresses.

    This guy lives so far .. more so far ..

    This happens with you too?
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    Apr 17, 2012 2:19 AM GMT
    Well I've never been in a trans-Atlantic relationship but both my ex-boyfriend and current boyfriend live out of state. The distance is definitely a problem during the work week. Weekends aren't as bad but still it would be nice to have a short drive instead of a long one.
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    Apr 17, 2012 2:46 AM GMT
    is it possible? I think dont !
    Because many things about a guy you can't know! And if you dont know cpmplete a guy you can't really love! But if you really like you can travel to know him and in this moment you can decide if him could be your lover!
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    Apr 17, 2012 2:48 AM GMT
    Most of the guys I have crushes on are out of this state; and they guys in this state are either only capable of asking me to fuck, married or unwilling to speak to me.
    I don't do LDR, or care to try again. Friendship is good enough for now. I've got another 6 months or so before I've got uncontrollable desires for a hookup to fight.
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    Apr 17, 2012 2:49 AM GMT
    ya - it seems to be an issue with every gay man at one point or another...
    why? because compared to the breeders we have slim pickings... so when we finally do find that someone chances are he lives in a different location.
    Hard to do it? Very. Impossible? Nah... but I think it'd only work long-term if one guy eventually relocates... can't stay distant forever.
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    Apr 17, 2012 2:54 AM GMT
    Yes. It is life playing a little joke on you. icon_confused.gif
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    Apr 17, 2012 3:35 AM GMT
    I feel the same way... there's only so much of them that you can learn about through the computer screen. Also another reason why I tend to not msg guys when they live on the other side of the country. icon_neutral.gif. As for the nearby ones that I like, they never msg me back icon_sad.gif.
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    Apr 17, 2012 4:48 AM GMT
    JPtheBITCH saidDid he take your head with him as a keepsake when he went home?


    341545_o.gif
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    Apr 17, 2012 5:31 AM GMT
    It's because fetish is driving your sexual desire not what is normally called a human relationship. It's kinda typical in gay men that incidental stuff triggers lust. Its also contradictory to the belief that we are "born this way" . How could a gay man be born having a thing for leather, jock straps and guys that live a thousand miles away?
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    Apr 17, 2012 5:35 AM GMT
    I've been in a relationship where we were long distance for part of the time. It didn't work out, but not because of the distance. I would be willing to be in an LDR, but I would have to know that we could be together at some point in the future. It's a hard way to have a relationship, but if the guy is worth, then you make that sacrifice.
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    Apr 17, 2012 5:52 AM GMT
    Alpha13 saidIt's because fetish is driving your sexual desire not what is normally called a human relationship. It's kinda typical in gay men that incidental stuff triggers lust. Its also contradictory to the belief that we are "born this way" . How could a gay man be born having a thing for leather, jock straps and guys that live a thousand miles away?
    Wtf? That made almost no sense, and the part that made sense was just stupid. Of course people arent BORN with fetishes. They develop and manifest over time with experience and exposure. For example, I find underwear sexy because I see a lot of hot guys posing in underwear. I dislike sm because as I grew up I noticed that I dont like pain. And what kind of fool has a FETISH for long distance RELATIONSHIPS? You can have a fetish for foreigns guys, or guys whose type arent found in your area, but not a fetish for the fact that they live far away, or the relationship itself. Lastly what is the "it" you are referring to?
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    Apr 17, 2012 6:02 AM GMT
    My man lives in Florida and I live in Nevada. It is very hard sometimes, but we talk every day and we travel back and forth once a month. It's tough, but we're making it work until we can be together full time.
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    Apr 17, 2012 2:03 PM GMT
    LDR can work but it requires a lot of effort from the parties invovled. Complacency, lack of communication, and distrust tend to be the most common causes of LDR breakdowns.
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    May 29, 2013 6:57 PM GMT
    LDRs suck
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    Jun 02, 2013 4:24 AM GMT
    In a LDR now, and it's a bitch. Emotions run high because you barely have time together, you make the few days you spend together perfect, and the stress is unwieldy.

    Plus, trust is key, essential to any relationship but even more so in LDR.
  • RangerJoshD

    Posts: 50

    Jun 02, 2013 4:36 AM GMT
    VOLCANOMYTE saidmensagens-para-namorado-mora-longe.jpg

    What is the problem?
    Every time I meet a guy who makes my heart beat faster, which I feel like staying with him all the time and lie on his chest exchanging caresses.

    This guy lives so far .. more so far ..

    This happens with you too?


    OMG!!! Yes it does!!
  • aj101

    Posts: 1842

    Jun 02, 2013 4:38 AM GMT
    I have been in a long distance relationship for the past year. It is a very hard thing to maintain and do, however if you truly care about the person you can make it work.
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    Jun 02, 2013 5:01 AM GMT
    i've been in 3 long distance relationships. Well i'd really only count the 1 as a true relationship. The other 2 were just a few months if that.

    But it's stressful as shit- and I personally will not do it again. My last one was 2.5 years- oof!

    I'm not saying it won't work for others...but there's a lot of trust, dedication and hard work that needs to go into it. You really need to figure out your priorities and get them in order before investing in something like that.

    best of luck though.
  • BryUSC88

    Posts: 198

    Jun 02, 2013 12:35 PM GMT
    Yep...that seems to happen to me too. Every time I seem to find someone cool, they live far away. But here's my philosophy on that. Being gay, we have a MUCH smaller "pool" to pick from. So if you limit yourself to ONLY dating people in your city, your pool of potentials is that much smaller. Most of us don't live in NYC, Chicago, or LA...so we don't have tons of guys to pick from. I live in the southeast US...so I'd like to find someone that at least lives in the region. Long distance to me doesn't matter that much as long as you both would have a long term goal of living in the same city. Just my opinion...I'm sure some only want to date guys that are living in their neighborhood.
  • cara87

    Posts: 35

    Dec 28, 2013 8:19 PM GMT
    This happens to me too and currently I am knowing a guy in another state but we both are willing to date even far away. I hope it will work.. icon_exclaim.gif
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    Dec 30, 2013 1:53 AM GMT
    my ex and i just broke up this month.. he lives in virginia and i live in toronto, ontario (Canada).. the thing is he came to me every month driving 10+ hours to see me.. and i flew to him and stayed with him for 2 months during the summer.. both of us arent out and he eventually was breaking down cause of his family.. he became scared of us.. and it was breaking my heart to see him like that.. the skype dates became painful and a lot of crying.. LDR are hard.. but in our case it didnt matter.. he didnt care that he had to drive 10 hours to see me.. nor did i care about having to fly to the u.s to see him xP (im not that gud at driving).. but LDR work if both sides are willing and truly think something is special.. in my case he felt like he had to choose between his family and me so it didnt turn out that well..
  • cara87

    Posts: 35

    Dec 30, 2013 2:03 AM GMT
    keho92 saidmy ex and i just broke up this month.. he lives in virginia and i live in toronto, ontario (Canada).. the thing is he came to me every month driving 10+ hours to see me.. and i flew to him and stayed with him for 2 months during the summer.. both of us arent out and he eventually was breaking down cause of his family.. he became scared of us.. and it was breaking my heart to see him like that.. the skype dates became painful and a lot of crying.. LDR are hard.. but in our case it didnt matter.. he didnt care that he had to drive 10 hours to see me.. nor did i care about having to fly to the u.s to see him xP (im not that gud at driving).. but LDR work if both sides are willing and truly think something is special.. in my case he felt like he had to choose between his family and me so it didnt turn out that well..


    Yeah, he chose his family but maybe someday his mind changes and you both will be together again, but keep going with you life
  • zalcland

    Posts: 51

    Dec 30, 2013 2:07 AM GMT
    I met a guy online who lived in another state. We dated for about 3 months. I flew and visited him and it was a week of wonderful bliss. Both being in college, distance killed it. We were too consumed with our lives and it fell apart.
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    Dec 30, 2013 2:15 AM GMT


    hmmm okay continue.

    *just browsing
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    Dec 30, 2013 2:31 AM GMT
    Yes it has happened, and I would avoid it. It seems to always end in frustration.