You're hot and a definitely catch, yet still looking and single? What is wrong with you?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2008 7:19 AM GMT
    Sometimes we fail to ask this ourselves. We read one-sided stories of break-ups but never really get to hear what the other party has to say. There must be something wrong in the equation. Discuss, please.
    LOL@YOU
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    Jul 17, 2008 9:55 AM GMT
    There's something wrong with the equation of this thread. Which topic do you want to discuss? Being single? Breaking up? Judging from one-sided stories? What do you want us to talk about here? ... icon_rolleyes.gif
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jul 17, 2008 11:05 AM GMT
    Yeah... the question doesn't match the body of the thread

    Somebody been placing the box of wine next to the computer much?
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    Jul 17, 2008 2:58 PM GMT
    GQjock saidSomebody been placing the box of wine next to the computer much?


    But why keep box wine around the old fasioned way when you can download wine right into a glass!


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    Jul 17, 2008 3:22 PM GMT
    I'm closeted, I have low self-confidence, I live halfway around the world, I have too many bodyguards surrounding me, my fortress island is impregnable anyway, I'm too focused on my career atm (global domination), and I'm happy with my cookies.
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    Jul 17, 2008 4:45 PM GMT
    Sedative saidI'm closeted, I have low self-confidence, I live halfway around the world, I have too many bodyguards surrounding me, my fortress island is impregnable anyway, I'm too focused on my career atm (global domination), and I'm happy with my cookies.


    Low self-confidence and global domination in my mind contradict each other!
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    Jul 17, 2008 4:48 PM GMT
    Paint me confused with this one! icon_confused.gif
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    Jul 17, 2008 4:50 PM GMT
    LOLatYOU saidSometimes we fail to ask this ourselves. We read one-sided stories of break-ups but never really get to hear what the other party has to say. There must be something wrong in the equation. Discuss, please.
    LOL@YOU


    I am not quite sure what you are asking, but I think I agree with the irritating fact that most people have trouble being honest with themselves about their own flaws and role in the failure of a relationship.

    Not really any surprise there, most people live in a dream world when it comes to a sense of self. Either their self-confidence and self-esteem is lower than it should be, or they create their own reality and have a high self-esteem that is not warranted.

    After many years of thinking about this, I have come to the conclusion that loving one's self is a critical ingredient in a successful relationship, but self-love means being able to admit to yourself that at times you can be an asshole or jerk and need to apologize to your partner. Sounds easy but trust me it is not.
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    Jul 17, 2008 4:54 PM GMT
    icon_confused.gif

    Some people dont want to be in a relationship. They may have just gotten out of one or just want to have fun without the aspects of being in a relationship.

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    Jul 17, 2008 5:10 PM GMT
    The last time I checked, I didn't think that there was anything wrong with me, so I think it's just I haven't met 'the one' yet
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    Jul 17, 2008 5:16 PM GMT
    SurrealLife said
    Sedative saidI'm closeted, I have low self-confidence, I live halfway around the world, I have too many bodyguards surrounding me, my fortress island is impregnable anyway, I'm too focused on my career atm (global domination), and I'm happy with my cookies.


    Low self-confidence and global domination in my mind contradict each other!



    really? in my mind, they ALWAYS go hand in hand! look at napoleon, hitler, suddam, bush lol- they all have serious insecurity issues involving expectations they feel they must live up to at any cost, and complicated relationships with their fathers :p
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    Jul 17, 2008 5:19 PM GMT
    though in response to the TITLE of this thread lol- speaking for myself i can say its a perfect-storm combination of geographical isolation in crappy cities, introversion that keeps me away from the clubs and bars, along with high standards that i refuse to sacrifice for the sake of being off the market.
  • in773guy

    Posts: 89

    Jul 17, 2008 5:23 PM GMT
    Also in response to the title....
    I may just be way to picky and really like my independence....except at night....then you can lay with me....hehe
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Jul 17, 2008 5:30 PM GMT
    I don't date because I work too much and live in a wasteland. Even if I did get a date, I wouldn't likely make for good company considering how impossible my schedule and stress levels are.

    Fairly simple explanation.
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    Jul 17, 2008 5:45 PM GMT
    Because there is a sliver of happy medium I have yet to reach with anyone.

    I enjoy my life, where it is going, the friends I have, the city I live in, and the things I like to do. So my partner will need to integrate their own list of similar values without interrupting my flow too much. Granted, complete continuity is too much to ask and some compromises happen. I'm attracted to smart, motivated, intellectually curious guys. So they have their own flow that they are very protective of as well.

    However, you also get these guys who aren't future-minded about anything but who they marry, and will adjust their lives unconditionally. These are the ones who tend to fall in love too soon and for their own deep-seated reasons, not because there's a natural dynamic there. These situations create an unsustainable imbalance to which I am becoming increasingly resistant.

    I know I'll find that sweet spot with someone amazing. I'm patient...after all, this is the rest of my life.
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    Jul 17, 2008 5:50 PM GMT
    Why is the assumption that there's something wrong with anyone?!?!?!?
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    Jul 17, 2008 5:58 PM GMT
    czarodziej said
    SurrealLife said
    Sedative saidI'm closeted, I have low self-confidence, I live halfway around the world, I have too many bodyguards surrounding me, my fortress island is impregnable anyway, I'm too focused on my career atm (global domination), and I'm happy with my cookies.


    Low self-confidence and global domination in my mind contradict each other!



    really? in my mind, they ALWAYS go hand in hand! look at napoleon, hitler, suddam, bush lol- they all have serious insecurity issues involving expectations they feel they must live up to at any cost, and complicated relationships with their fathers :p


    My thoughts exactly. Look at Anakin Skywalker. icon_lol.gif
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:00 PM GMT
    a1972guy saidWhy is the assumption that there's something wrong with anyone?!?!?!?


    Seriously, there's some freaking hate in that assumption, either self-hate, or self-hate turned against someone else. Quite a telling assumption indeed.
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:05 PM GMT
    Sedative, I differentiate between low self-esteem and low self-confidence.

    Low self-esteem = "I am a shitty person that nobody loves".

    Low self-confidence = "I am not capable of doing this".

    Napoleon and Hitler had a lot of self-confidence and drive when it came to reaching their goals of conquering other nations and people. They also did not mind being ruthless to get their way.

    Saddam Hussein was a cold-blooded pyschopath like Stalin, and Bush is a mistake!
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:07 PM GMT
    XRuggerATX saidBecause there is a sliver of happy medium I have yet to reach with anyone.

    I enjoy my life, where it is going, the friends I have, the city I live in, and the things I like to do. So my partner will need to integrate their own list of similar values without interrupting my flow too much. Granted, complete continuity is too much to ask and some compromises happen. I'm attracted to smart, motivated, intellectually curious guys. So they have their own flow that they are very protective of as well.

    However, you also get these guys who aren't future-minded about anything but who they marry, and will adjust their lives unconditionally. These are the ones who tend to fall in love too soon and for their own deep-seated reasons, not because there's a natural dynamic there. These situations create an unsustainable imbalance to which I am becoming increasingly resistant.

    I know I'll find that sweet spot with someone amazing. I'm patient...after all, this is the rest of my life.


    Now, the singlehood of Ruggers is totally incomprehensible to me. Look at him! A total hunk of masculinity! The man is the quintessence of manliness. *sigh*
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:15 PM GMT
    Caslon5000 said
    XRuggerATX saidBecause there is a sliver of happy medium I have yet to reach with anyone.

    I enjoy my life, where it is going, the friends I have, the city I live in, and the things I like to do. So my partner will need to integrate their own list of similar values without interrupting my flow too much. Granted, complete continuity is too much to ask and some compromises happen. I'm attracted to smart, motivated, intellectually curious guys. So they have their own flow that they are very protective of as well.

    However, you also get these guys who aren't future-minded about anything but who they marry, and will adjust their lives unconditionally. These are the ones who tend to fall in love too soon and for their own deep-seated reasons, not because there's a natural dynamic there. These situations create an unsustainable imbalance to which I am becoming increasingly resistant.

    I know I'll find that sweet spot with someone amazing. I'm patient...after all, this is the rest of my life.


    Now, the singlehood of Ruggers is totally incomprehensible to me. Look at him! A total hunk of masculinity! The man is the quintessence of manliness. *sigh*


    Actually, I think I am pretty close to having found this person. However, as an old-school Red Sox fan, I also must say that he could very well get trampled by a pack of wild elephants. Sox fans over 30 should "get" this anti-jinx mentality.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:23 PM GMT
    and why are all of you assuming that YOURE the hot one and the definite catch? he was talking about me people.

    :-P
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:25 PM GMT
    maybe i'm too gassy...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:26 PM GMT
    txguy1605 saidand why are all of you assuming that YOURE the hot one and the definite catch? he was talking about me people.

    :-P


    Not an assumption, a fact. Therefore it is my duty to reply. :-P
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2008 6:26 PM GMT
    SurrealLife saidSedative, I differentiate between low self-esteem and low self-confidence.

    Low self-esteem = "I am a shitty person that nobody loves".

    Low self-confidence = "I am not capable of doing this".

    Napoleon and Hitler had a lot of self-confidence and drive when it came to reaching their goals of conquering other nations and people. They also did not mind being ruthless to get their way.

    Saddam Hussein was a cold-blooded pyschopath like Stalin, and Bush is a mistake!


    Well... hmm...

    I am a shitty person that nobody loves and I'm not capable of conquering the world, so I'll go and conquer the world anyway! icon_twisted.gif

    Muaha

    Muahha

    MUAHAHAHHAHAHA! icon_wink.gif